What's your favorite non-human fictional character that you find sexually appealing ?

I'll go first: Jake Sully from Avatar.

Bonus: the robot from Lost in Space oops

I have long struggled with my sexuality and a huge reason is my enjoyment of fictional romance and erotica. Even without the romance/erotica part, I still thoroughly enjoy being immersed in worlds beyond our plane of existence and falling in love with characters.

But it is not what I love, but what makes me uncomfortable, that helped me connect the dots. I’ve found that I tend to gravitate away from characters that I can relate too much to, stories that hit a little too close to home, and fanfiction in the second-person. Basically if I have to think about my life and me in fiction, I tend to dislike it. That is not to say I don’t like stories that invoke introspection on how I live my life and reflections on other philosophical, anthropological, etc matters, but I feel very uncomfortable if I am asked to imagine myself directly transported into the story. It’s also why I tend to enjoy novels in the third-person than the first-person.

This is the same with my enjoyment of romance/erotica, in that it must be strictly limited to people who are not me, and preferably anyone that is not on the same plane of existence as I am. It is what led me to conclude that “aegosexual” is currently the most suitable label for my sexuality.

My question for other aegosexuals is whether you can relate to my general dislike for being directly involved in fictional settings. I do wonder if there’s some sort of connection there and if anyone is willing to share their experience.

I've been digging around the asexual community trying to get answers. I thought I was asexual with an aesthetic attraction and so-so on sex but after digging for a bit I realized I might be aego....

The part for me that sold it was the disconnection... It isn't me involved in these sexual acts but I'm a viewer or disconnect from the physical in some sort of way. In reality I would never.... Eww....

The part that was also true for me was the OCs in my head... Like sims or my own series, where all these sexual actions can happen to them.... I watch porn mostly when I'm lonely or when my libido is too high and I can't just ignore it...

I was looking for answers but I got some more questions... So is life I guess

I've been struggling for a while regarding my actual desires towards sex and similar. I do have sexual desires, needs and do have a rather high libido regarding masturbation and such. But when it comes to actual sex or even the thought of it being a potential topic between me and someone else, I just feel uncomfortable. I can't imagine myself in a sexual situation and instead use my OCs as "representations". This even blocked me off from actually progressing into potential romantic relationships because I fear the aspect of copulation. I always thought that I'm just repulsed by it because I'm scared of accidentally getting pregnant. But even when not given the risk I just feel uneasy about it. Especially since that caused a break up between me and my ex-girlfriend. I only heard of Aego yesterday and it does seem to fit. So I guess I'm ace?

hello dudes, ty for reading.

(UPDATE) THANKS TO YALL IVE DISCOVERED IM MIRANSEXUAL TYSMMMMMMMMM AAAAAA :))))))))))))))) big up u/Broken-Poet

i find ppls priv@te areas absolutely disgusting and i dont understand how peoples bodies are attractive its just skin. i watch alot of nsfw content and engage in solo stuff but the thought of doing anything irl makes me want to throw up. i fantasise about irl crushes and celebs doing things to me but i wouldnt ever want that to happen irl. some ppl say u can only be aego if u fantasise in 3rd person but since i fantasise in 1st and imagine it all happening to me (not an alt version of me) but me in my head, am i considered aego???? im very very very confused.

i currently identify as aroace , i am 100 percent aromantic for sure but ive hesitated with the asexual label as im not 100 percent ace . ive always had a complicated relationship with the concept of sex but when i heard about aegosexuality ive wondered if ive finally found a ace-related sexuality that fits me .

im mostly irl sex repulsed and sometimes fictionally too, but i get intense romantic feelings for fictional characters and with certain ones i have vivid and frequent sexual fantasies about me and them . i have read smut before with previous crushes and with my current one suggestive x readers and as i have read in one of them i really enjoy the idea of him being sexually attracted to and having sexual fantasies about me (self-insert character) . i would like to add that i cant imagine myself engaging in sexual activities in real life and i’m scared to do so , and sexual content involving real people grosses me out .

im not sure if im aego due to to fact that my fantasies do involve me but not directly myself but more me in the same universe as my fictional crush , any help would be greatly appreciated !!!

Hello wonderful humans,

After struggling to identify my sexuality pretty much all my life (31F), I came across the term aegosexual and it pretty much slapped me in the face. I immediately felt like something described me, and as an AuDHD person, labels are sooooo comforting.

For context - I’ve always been considered the “token straight” in my friend group (a very endearing term) so I’m not at all worried or ashamed of discovering myself to be of a different sexual orientation. In fact, my best friends are probably going to be in “we told you so!” mode for awhile. Plus, everyone in my life are staunch supporters and advocates for the LGBTQ+ community, so I’ll have a great support when I decide to come out.

The one person I’m struggling to figure out how to come out to is my husband (31M). He is VERY pro LGBTQ+ and is a great ally, so I’m not worried about him looking down on me or anything. My concern is just based on his personality, I’m pretty positive he’s going to feel like it’s his “fault,” like he couldn’t sexually satisfy me or something. He already has a lot of confidence issues surrounding sex (that I really don’t want to get into details about unless he consents to me talking about it, even anonymously).

My other concern is that he’s going not going to be honest with me about sexual compatibility. He’s 100% going to want to make me as comfortable as possible, even if it leads to him not getting what he needs.

For additional context, I believe I’m “sex neutral,” in the sense I find sex just kind of a chore, but it’s something I’m totally willing to do with him if he wants it. I believe he’s heterosexual with a pretty normal sex drive. We have sex about once a week, but I can tell he wants to be a little more “spontaneous”

So with all that, here are my questions:

a) how can I come out to him in a way that lets him know about me and who I am, without him thinking it’s his because of something he’s done? With his confidence issues, he puts a lot of emphasis on “pleasing” me, which is so sweet, but I really don’t need it. I don’t want him to think I don’t want to have sex with him.

b) how can we balance our sex lives so we can both get what we need? My executive dysfunction is pretty bad, and since I see sex as a chore, I always feel terrible about turning him down when he’s feeling it.

If you got this far, thank you from the bottom of my heart for your labor. Any insight is much appreciated. 💕

I've never had sex, or really the craving for It I do enjoy NSFW content, and even get off to asmrs and sometimes Imagine scenario with fictional chatacters I adore. (Not real people)

I did get a few crushes on people, but that was after I became friends with them and go to know them over time Yet, when my (now ex) boyfriend tried to kiss me a few times, I immediatly backed away. I do read lots of romance and dream of kissing a lot, yet everytime I have the chance, I feel terrified and just don't

I don't know if maybe it's by trust issues or somenthing else.. (my ex was someone I knew I woulndn't date forever and probably liked a friend of ours too) I just don't know if it's normal or maybe I should go to therapy

Hello all,

I am M(27) and I have been feeling extremely turned off by having sex. I masterbate only to relieve stress. I find people attractive and can imagine sex in my head but when it comes to actually doing it I get turned off. I don't read smut or anything like that for fun, I use it as a means to an end to relax and go about my day. I am in a relationship with a F(26) who's love language is physical and it upsets her that we don't have sex that often. I force my self to have sex (using viagra) but it is causing a rift in our relationship. I try and meet her needs but when she comes on to me nothing goes on down there. I enjoy making out, cuddling, holding hands, etc. Just not sex itself. Any help would be appreciated!

I just recently learned about this label and find that I fit the profile. I was wondering why I had such a disinterest in initiating sex with my significant other as I am extremely attracted to him. I just never really have the urge unless I'm pleasuring myself. And even then, I have to have a specific scenario in my head which never involves myself. I just struggle because I really want to improve my sex life but I feel like I have to think really hard about specific stories, and I can't really concentrate when in the moment.

Hello!

We are interested in understanding how someone’s lived experiences differ from their online identities and experiences. Our research aims to understand how people create social media profiles or video game characters, and the decisions people make around creating these personas. We are recruiting in this group, r/aegosexuals, because we are interested in responses from people who use social media, dating apps, and role-playing video games. For this study, we are interested in interviewing people on Zoom for 30-45 minutes about the website, dating app, or game that they use most.

https://forms.gle/LzbRqofSRcPWHsHn6

Please click the link above if you would like to participate. The link above contains study information, a consent form, and a place for you to submit your contact information. Please let me know if you have any questions below this post, or directly to my email in the link. You will be contacted shortly after submitting your contact info for next steps.

Thank you for your time,

The Research Team

I (late 20s woman) have never really been sure what I am. I've never had sex or anything close to it, and not because I've never been in a position to do it. I've had boyfriends and gone out with men before who have expressed sexual desire towards me, but I can't reciprocate. In fact, I become extremely uncomfortable around any sexual situation. Even at my age I still feel like a child where it comes to sex. I read posts about other adults engaging in casual sex and sex positivity and it genuinely sounds alien to me; I can't relate with it at all. I can't even relate with the desire to have sex. The more somebody treats me sexually, the harder I dissociate from them and our relationship. I don't suffer from childhood SA or anything like that so it's been hard to understand why I feel so stunted. I'd be happy having a romantic relationship without any sex, or to compromise for the sake of my partner, but even then, I wouldn't be interested in receiving any reciprocation beyond just meeting their needs. I remember having a crush on a boy when I was a young teenager but I haven't felt like that since. But today I read about the label Aegosexual, and it seems to describe me perfectly. Even though I have a low libido it's not none, and I can get aroused by drawings and fantasize about fictional characters. I have enjoyed reading and writing smut, but never inserting myself into it. The thought of self insertion or imagining myself having sex repulses me. Basically, Aegosexual seems to completely describe me. And my friends seem to agree that I'm clearly on the ace spectrum. I think that's just what I am.

I thought I might be ace for a while now (thinking about fantasy sex is fine, but thinking about actually having sex, yuck, I was never really interested), but I always felt it wasn’t quite right because of constant sexual fantasies. I just discovered that aegosexuality exists today. I am trans (mtf) and startet HRT 2 months ago. Before I started I had a very high libido, read smutty transformation storys to do it and had constant extreme sexual fantasies. Often in first person, but always as a woman. Since I startet HRT (literally since the first day) I haven’t had a single sexual fantasy but I still enjoy the stories, but I don't self insert anymore. (Thinking about) Sexual fantasies in first person feel really weird now. So, probably aego. It honestly felt really freeing.

Hey, all! So, I (25M) am beginning to believe that I am aegosexual.

While I do enjoy masturbating every couple to several days (urge or not), sometimes experience sexual attraction, and imagine scenarios involving random people (not necessarily OC's) participating in sexual activities from time to time, outside of self pleasure, I do not have any interest or desire to pursue in any sexual activities with anybody at all, including my girlfriend (22F), who is ace. Hell, I can't even begin to imagine just how uncomfortable performing the action would be and the pressure and sensitivity that may arise from it. In fact, I'm not even sure if it would feel all that good, personally. As far as erotica or smut fanfictions, well, they honestly just don't appeal to me at all, nor do I really care or see the need to read this kind of literature. I also currently identify as greysexual, as I much, much prefer non-sexual affection in real life, and so does my girlfriend (cuddles for the win!).

All the above means that I am aego, correct? Any answers are greatly appreciated. Thank you!

So for the longest time I’ve identified as aromatic and asexual, I also considered myself sex repulsed. But I’ve been questioning if im aego lately because I’ve recently been enjoying a ship. I enjoy reading smut fics abt these two characters and fantasizing about them doing naughty things together, but I don’t necessarily get aroused or need to touch myself when reading/thinking about them? If that makes sense. I enjoy thinking about them in intimate situations just like i enjoy thinking about them kissing.

Do you think I’m aego or just ace?

edit: forgot to mention that i dont fantasize myself in any sexual/romantic situations, only my ships. Even if i tried i’d feel really grossed out and repulsed

I’m a sucker for doujin, manhwas, webtoons, fanfiction and works of fiction in movies/shows and I fangirl over these things all the time. But when it comes to going outside and looking at all of the PDA between real life couples, hugging, kissing, all of that kind of stuff, it’s just…bleugh?

It’s a really weird feeling, to feel super sex and romance-positive/favourite towards fictional ships, but feel extremely sex and romance-negative/repulsed towards people in relationships irl. I mean, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being in a relationship and I understand that love is a really important and sweet feeling to have, but I just prefer it when it’s on a piece of paper or on a screen, made up from the minds of a group of people.

I’m really sorry if this comes out as rude to anybody or offends anyone that is in a romantic or sexual relationship/enjoy irl relationships. I’m just curious to see whether people feel similarly to me or if this is a rare opinion to have.

What do you guys do when you feel bad about being it? I came out over 10 years ago but every once in a while I get into a slump where I feel upset about being different than everyone else. What do y’all do to build your confidence back up?

My current partner and I experience sexual attraction to one another in person. This has never happened in my life or theirs. We have been dating for a while before being physically intimate and knew each other even longer before that as friends.

I always had the classic signs of being aego especially never having my fantasies be about people I know or include me. However, with my current partner it is practically reversed. I can't fantasized about them alone even if I try. It kills any drive I had going. I felt very comfy and confident in the aego label and still do as this is just one person and previously I tried with quite a few people before finding the aego label. Just wondering if anyone else has experienced this? Am I demi- aego? I'm quite confused and thought I'd never experience this in my life and am doubtful I will again with someone else.

i’m truly having a hard time trying to figure out what exactly my sexual reactions to certain things mean and if they means anything at all. i know that feel romantic attraction. and i’ve gone through the whole confusing ordeal of men’s sexual interest in me as romantic attraction. whole 9 yards. feels bad. but. i know that part quite of myself well. what i don’t know is how sexual feelings tie into it. i can get aroused by people, i can think they’re hot. but i don’t want to have sex with them. i just don’t want to be in the picture. it feels horrendous to think about it. that’s why i can and prefer to engage in smut or erotic media where it’s about other people. i can sometimes imagine the acts and how’d they’d feel, but i don’t actually want it to be real because then i’d have to be there. with another person. horrendous.

So usually I identify as asexual but romantic, since I have no real desire to have sex with anyone, but lately there’s someone who shakes stuff up. Now I feel they are a sexually attractive person, and I get butterflies and smiley around them but it’s not a crush I don’t like them, and don’t want to date or kiss or hold hands. But I do however find myself like in an aegosexualish feeling where I’m absolutely disgusted at the thought of sex with them but also catch myself thinking “oh damn I wanna rail them” but like in my head not irl. Also it’s very icky in my head too…

So like idk what I’m feeling?! Is it an aromantic sexual attraction or an aromantic aegosexual attraction to this person?? I’ve never really felt like I wanted to bang someone before so it’s very weird to me cuz I identify as ace but also this doesn’t feel like a true sexual attraction either since I feel disgusted at the thought of actually doing anything but then I still feel a bit tickly when I’m around them.

Lol idk if this is the right place for this, sorry if it all sounds like word vomit!!

So I've been thinking I might be ace-spec since, I want to say, the start of 2022. I initially thought I might be Demisexual, then found this label and it really resonated with me. There's a moment from when I was a teenager that I kind of want to share because looking back at it, I'm not sure how I didn't realize I was at least ace-spec since.

When I was with my first girlfriend between 13-14, I realized very quickly that she was more interested in sex than I was. I had fantasized about sex before at the point, in third person, but I never had the desire to actually pursue it. And I still don't even at 24. But one day I thought about what it'd be like if we were to have sex, and here is what my brain came up with. We were at her house and going at it. I imagined it in third person, and she was very much into it. The "camera" then zoomed in on my face and I just looked bored. I clearly wasn't into it as much as she was.

Looking back I think that should have been my first clue that something was different. I assume most teenage boys if they were to think about having sex with their girlfriends wouldn't imagine themselves being bored. I just think that's a kind of funny story, and if anyone else has similar stories, I think it'd be really fun to share.

(first time posting on reddit and I'm nervous to post this)

I have been starting to question whether I am aegosexual?

Originally, I started questioning whether I was ace like 3 years ago but pushed it aside bcos I thought maybe I was feeling that way because I had never experienced anything sexual, never kissed anyone and have never had a bf (I still haven't done/had anything to this day) and the thought of doing stuff (kissing included) makes me feel a bit weird. Cuddling and forehead/cheek kisses I'm fine with but idk abt anything else.

I can imagine sexual scenarios, sometimes where I'm involved, always from a 3rd person pov, but I don't think I want to actually do it irl or maybe I'd do it if I had an emotional connection with the person first. The idea/thought of sex is ok but actually doing it? I'm not sure where I stand.

I can consume sexual content like visual stuff (mostly solo stuff with dirty talk) or smut when I read books and its fine, I can imagine the scenarios, but I don't think I can ever imagine myself doing them with someone in reality.

Overall, I'm just very confused and I don't know what to do to figure myself out.

23F, just recently found out aegosexuality is a label that explains so much for me and have been actively trying to embrace it as part of my sexuality and personality in general. Also,I have been coming to terms with the fact that in the past, I actively tried to get myself into sexual situations just to try and force myself to enjoy it, and that that doesnt have anything to do with how i experience my sexuality and identify as an Aego. I have minor traumas related to being slut shamed a lot of times, which in the context of my aegosexualism it affects me to other levels it just makes my brain flatline. The thing is that now I don’t know if it is worth it or a big deal to come out as aego/ace to my parents and friends because of two main reasons: 1) im afraid when i tell them, that they will try and convince me that im not right and "how could you be aegosexual if you did x and y" (which doesnt represent me at all), contradicting all my efforts to come out. 2) should I come out as aegosexual? Like, is that a thing people need the necessity to come out for? Like I think I experience some guilt on the fact that I don’t like to be involved in sexual contexts but I also like to consume sexual content, like I’m in the acespec but I’m not a full ace, I’m aego. Also, this is a very specific sexuality that almost nobody has ever heard of at least in my country, so if I try coming out people wouldn’t get it as well and might think I’m crazy. Please help me find some reason in all of this. I’m very interested in hearing the experience of fellow aegos that came out and how that went and how did that make them feel. Also, I’m new in posting things here on Reddit and it makes me kinda anxious so please don’t be mean :3

So, as the title suggests, I told my mom I'm aego, and she took it surprisingly well. She's a devout Catholic; a nun if we're going to be hard core about it (she's a lay order nun). The conversation was centered around her vows of chastity, which are optional in a lay order since she can still live a secular lifestyle, such as marriage and family for example. Somehow the topic drifted to what I wanted in a partner in terms of intimacy, and I came out with it. She was like, "weren't you bi?" I explained everything to her, and we had this long conversation about how times have changed and how she felt bad about how her generation viewed aces if they bothered viewing them at all (she's a boomer). I don't think she felt personally guilty or that she was a failure as a parent. I think she felt like people from her time were ignorant and it bugged her. She didn't really understand my attraction, but she accepted it. I assured her that I would still like to have a partner in the future, do the domestic thing but with Pomeranians instead of kids; wholesome cuddles instead of sex; and companionship instead of typical romance. She still doesn't want to hear my yaoi fics though. Lol.

I feel like this question will be a niche in a niche, but any RPG players here? I love playing pen and paper Role Playing Games but loooog ago I discovered I hate playing characters that are similar to me and really like to play those who I usually imagine in exciting, hmm... aego scenarios (not involving sex, because things that excite me are something else). Then I’ve red about aegos not liking first and second person fiction and separating themselves from the characters of their fantasies and the connection suddenly became obvious for me.

What do you think? Do yo have similar experiences? Or maybe completely different?

So, I when I was a preteen I was really really insecure with the idea of sex, I tried to push myself into listening to more adult songs, to wear more revealing clothing, to learn how to dance to impress people and etc, all that because I thought sex was the most important aspect, and if you had a good sex appeal people would like you, even though I was just a child (I was also very isolated in my childhood)

But now I have a big number of friends, I like myself and my life. I never thought about being ace since I imagined about sex, but then I discovered what aegosexual was. I realized I liked read and fantasize about things, but I never put me in the scenes in 90% of the times, and I never imagined it with real people, I also never touched myself, I think if I feel like aegosexual bcs I never had sex, but when I think about doing it I feel strange and grossed out :'] so I will respect my body and explore more of this world about aegosexual people, honestly the idea of sex not being necessary in some relationships is a relief ^-^