RULES

So my 5+ relationship ended last year and I haven’t stopped thinking about him ever since. There’s not been one day where I haven’t thought about him. I just got done with a major exam this year and I have some time before I join a college and with all the free time, the thoughts have been getting worse. I’ve been analysing everything that happened and I wonder if it’s my fault.

My ex used to be the most understanding person and someone who I shared everything with. He was the kind of person who mostly kept things to himself but I would say whatever he shared, he did with me. Anyway, he was very very strong academically and when I was preparing for the said competitive exam, he always used to encourage me, guide me, help me. He was the one I shared allllll of my frustrations with and he would always listen. The first attempt went horribly bad and when I told him, he was not judgemental at all. He encouraged me to write it again and so i did. The second time i was doing it with a job and a lot of things were going wrong this time. My manager was the most toxic person to ever exist and I would get yelled at everyday. I would come home crying almost everyday. My dog got sick at the same time and well, within 3 weeks of getting sick, he passed away. Luckily, my ex had come back home from college around this time and he was around me most of the time. My boss still yelled at me everyday though, and my exam prep had taken a backseat, all of this was taking a toll on mental health. And honestly, my ex was there by my side through it all and i felt more loved than ever.

But I’ll admit, that i had started heavily trauma dumping on him by this point. I had even asked him if it was fine by him bc i understood how it could be frustrating but he told me that he was okay with it. After he went back home, he had gotten very busy with his thesis as he was graduating. Our conversations had become shorter and less frequent and I did not have a problem with it. In fact, even with his busy schedule he’d call me everyday at 10pm when he got a little time for himself. At this point, with whatever time he had left at college, he was also trying to make the best use of it and going out with his friends as much as he could. With so much going on, our conversations had really diluted (so much so that I had a severe toothache for which i couldn’t eat followed up by a wisdom tooth extraction that he completely forgot about) but i didn’t have a problem with that. Also, I tried my best to not trauma dump atp because i wanted him to enjoy himself to the fullest. But he’d still keep me posted about important things

But things went south suddenly after he came back. He had one month till he joined a college for masters. He came back a changed person. He was not willing to meet me alone and if it were alone, he wasn’t willing to meet for more than 2 hours. We were arguing over this and he’d just tell me that he didn’t have the energy to argue. At the same time, when i didn’t talk to him for an entire day (he had friends over so i didn’t wanna bother them) he asked me if i was mad at him (???). Literally the next day, after repetitively asking what was wrong, he told me he didn’t have feelings for me. OVER TEXT. I asked him to come over and he didn’t want to and I literally had to beg him. In person, he was very cold. But weirdly enough, when i told him i would block him, he wanted to be in touch and asked me if our relationship meant nothing to me, that i’d block him so easily (???). He told me that he had lost feelings about a year back but he pretended to like me. He wanted to break up with me the last time he was home but couldn’t bc of my dog’s death. It’s been 8 months since and we haven’t talked.

My problem is that he had sufficient time before my dog’s death to break up. Also, when he had come over, i had felt more loved by him than ever. He had even offered to come home and tutor me everyday for my exam. We had met almost everyday. Before this, he had mentioned me (alongside others) in the acknowledgment of his research paper. He would call me whenever he’d get free time. I had told him I was happy that i was getting comfortable with his family, especially with his mom, and he had told me that he liked it. All this time, he had no feelings for me? The only time I felt weird was when he had gotten distant in his last month at college, but even then, he called me everyday at 10pm. And he told me he couldn’t find the right time but he broke up with me 3 months before my exam, over text. Upon asking him what i had done, he said that it was nothing i had done, just that he had lost feelings. But why didn’t it show in his behaviour? Is it that easy to lose feelings? The only reason I can think of is the trauma dumping and the shit I was dealing with got to him. I wasn’t taking care of myself and was depressed af. I have gotten no closure, he didn’t even meet me once before leaving.

I keep telling myself that i must’ve done something wrong for something so drastic to happen. But I cannot think of anything. I’m going crazy.

disclaimer: i do not personally like the "all men are scum/shit" or "good men don't exist/are hard to find" etc remarks. ive had my fair share of bad and creepy experiences. and i know it's sad that these experiences are common among a lot of women but i do think men are precious and deserve so much and they're also harmed by the patriarchy. so any men hating remarks are not welcome

also sorry if this kind of nsfw is not allowed

on to the actual thing: for a long time ive been unlearning and relearning a lot of stuff that's ingrained and im conditioned to. for example the shame around sex, ingrained beauty standards, male dominant narrative around sex and trying to prioritise my own self. this has been going on before my ex, my ex, break up and prioritising myself and now my current relationship. i made the decision to end my last relationship cos i felt like he didn't respect my physical boundaries. though he did help in boosting my self esteem a lot (but sometimes in an overly sexual way that made me feel pressurised). because of all of this heavy stuff i felt like i had to complete all of this healing shit before being able to be intimate with anyone.

my current relationship, in general has been very comfortable, slow, respectful and patient (from both ends). basic info: im 21(22 in few months), my partner/bf is (recently turned) 24. we've been dating for 10 ish months and official since 6 months. we're (not extremely far) long distance. we've had privacy a few times before (one night together and few hours here and there) and it's always felt so effortless to be physical with him. from non-sexual cuddles to steamy make outs. i love how i feel in my relationship but especially in physically intimate times. for eg. all of the previous times we've checked in with each other if we're comfortable with what's happening, what we like, what we'd like to change and if we want to slow down. it has felt very comfortable and respected. i know my partner has no pressure or judgment. but im still unlearning the ingrained shit. and he's been very understanding of it all. the thing is: i crave physical intimacy but all of the ingrained shit holds me back. im trying to explore and unlearn it all but not pressuring myself. it's heavy.

so the actual thing is: he made plans to visit me. we booked a hotel for a weekend. we've both planned everything together. for eg. researching couple friendly hotels that fit in our budget. we've discussed what we both want and expect and what specifically are we looking forward to with the privacy we'll get. we've discussed our insecurities and what we're conscious about so we can understand each other better and love and touch each other how we want to be. we've discussed the technicalities of protection (condoms and what kind/brand etc) and lube. we've made a menu of sorts(of sex acts) of our options are. i feel good about it all. (penetrative) sex is not mandatory but an option kept open if things heat up and we're in the mood. if it matters, this will be my first time with penetration. ive fingered myself (and improvised dildos lol)

the problem is: discussing it all with him makes me feel soooo excited and comfortable. but uptil that weekend ill just keep overthinking about all of the ingrained stuff and the pressure to perform and give and receive pleasure. i know we'll both be happy even if we just end up cuddling for the whole weekend. but i crave so much more but my mental block holds me back. so any tips for first time. any feel good stories to help. any reassurances. or anything else that could help. thank you!!!

Hi guys! I’m about to move into a hostel for college very very soon, and because it’s my first time living away from home I’m really clueless and thus quite paralyzed when it comes to preparing to move.

Anyone who has lived in hostels in Indian colleges, do drop your tips and advice for moving out and hostel life in the comments. Id be indebted if I could just get a push in the right direction with what essentials I need, what I should be buying, what I absolutely shouldn’t take and what I can expect.

If it’s relevant I’ll have my own room but a shared bathroom. Please someone un-paralyse me and tell me where to start😭

Dear corporate girlies. My previous job was remote and this is my first internship post PG which is WFO. I felt unsafe at work on Friday and I want your help on what to do next.

I was working till 7:30pm on Friday. Most people had left except 2 men and 2 women. My manager was out to grab snacks. Now, one of the men and the two women ( who report to him), were leaving for the day. I was busy finishing up the report and I was in a hurry. He came and stood next to me and kept staring at me+my screen. I got scared and squeaked with surprise. Since I was in a hurry, I didn't pay attention to him. So, he continued staring at me untill I finally looked at him to see if he wanted something. He said something to me about going home yada yada and left. In the background I could hear his subordinates laughing and telling him that they knew what he was trying to do.

Now, I don't know whether he wanted to just peek at my screen and look at my report or he was just being "friendly". But I am not his friend. I am not his anything! It was very unprofessional of him to stand so close to me when most people had left the office. It was even more disheartening to see the other women finding this amusing.

Am I in overacting to this? Or should I tell my manager about this and leave work before 7pm? Should I tell him the incident or avoid talking about it? One of the recruitment interns told me how she was asked by someone to fill a role, but it had to be a man because women can't take the pressure! I don't want to perpetuate this thing that women need to leave early just because they "feel unsafe". What a world do we live in ;(

Just thinking out loud here so some or all of it may not make sense. I've been a lil sick so hadn't been intimate with boyf for the last week. I'd been feeling better for a couple days so I suggested I'll maybe surprise him today or something.

So I called him a couple hours ago(we are ldr) and we had a pretty normal conversation- my roomate jumped in and we were chilling and all, then after she left I sorta tried starting something but he mentioned something we were talking about last (which he thought I may still be a lil upset about) and we stopped to talk things out. Now, after being done with that pretty serious conversation we again started trying something I'm not even sure how something came up which lead to something else and somehow I ended up discussing some past sexual experience with him. He did not pry, it was my stupid ass which thought it'd be a great idea to share that. And bam, instant regret. He was still very nice are normal about it, made a joke here and there but nothing disrespectful or even jealous. For some reason I was an awkward potato for an hour after that and just could not get over my stupidity. I'm not someone who has been ashamed of my choices or anything like that but I also don't share them with almost anyone. I feel like I have been judging myself from his eyes after that. Ki what if he sees me differently now. It was not even a big deal but idk. I know I'm being very silly rn but I tried to recover the night but he sorta left after that as he had earlier plans which I did know about. But he seemed a lil frustrated. (Which is fair cis I tried again but my head just wasn't in it and he said he is bored and has to leave). Now I feel bad about it.

Tldr- overshared with boyfie now overthinking my own past and present while he is chill. Lesson learnt - stop saying everything on your tongue. Nit all of them are smart decisions.

So, met this guy on bumble and have planned to go over his place. I'm a virgin, basically and I'm worried what if he has cameras or something there like they show in news. I've met him a couple of times before and he seems to be a nice guy but I'm just paranoid

(Posting here because r/IndianSkincareAddicts isn't entertaining personal queries)

Request: please don't be "politically correct" in this discussion. For once, I want honest answers and and not ones that'll make me "feel nice".

I have damaged, low volume, curly hair where curls fall apart and are mixed with waves in the lower/behind the head region. I fucking hate it. HATE IT. It makes me hate the way I look.

Here's my routine:

1. Bblunt coconut shampoo
2. Curl up conditioner
3. Arata hair cream when damp

(4. Sometimes, Plum hair serum)

Air dry after scrunching them up a few times. I can't bear my hair open so I end up tying them, and then then lose whatever curl pattern they have.

They end up looking like shit no matter what. Wtf are my options?

(Also processing a serious breakup so I am feeling low about how I look. SO I REALLY WANT TO LOOK GOOD)

Getting a bunch of creepy and uncomfortable texts from men that stalk the TwoXIndia sub reddit. I'm not a very active reddit participant and have 2 different accounts on reddit. However, whenever I use reddit I'm mostly commenting or engaging with posts on TwoX and really like the community. So fact is that men love stalking twoX, it's mostly for hateful purposes ofc and they resent all of us, but I've been getting allot of texts from men that start with "I really respect your opinion on TwoX and all women should stand up for themselves! Also what's the hottest dress you own? Can I see it?" and it's just, well comforting to know that I'm right about the fact that most men are scum but also stupid bc I walked right into being harassed by this dude. Now ik men that are hate scrolling TwoX rn would see this as a triumph, but I'm honestly too jaded to let this affect me, I go on any social media and observe some kind of hate from men always.

I'm just tired, and weary. Men really hate the fact that we have our own space, where we can call out their hypocrisy and harassment and help each other. They cannot see us be in peace. All I want is to be away from them, honestly.

Okay, rant over! Sorry if you scrolled this far.

Dear ladies, what should I pack or carry with me? I’ve been there as a tourist but this time I’m considering living there for 3-4 months.

Any other suggestions which you consider to be useful is welcome.

Backstory: I(26F) stay with my significant other(27M) in a rented apartment. We are unmarried. Our landlord is very casteist and misogynistic. He has asked us about our castes multiple times and our broker did hint us that he interrogated previous tenants about their inter caste marriage a lot. We came to know about this incident after we paid the security deposit so there was no way out for us. We have been planning since then to leave once we can afford.

Every month he comes to our apartment on weekends unannounced and creates havoc about "cleanliness". Now, both my S.O and I work full time and we only get weekends to relax. Our apartment is not unclean by any means. He just likes to complain. Never to my bf only to me which comes of as very misogynistic as if I am the only person responsible for household chores. Not to mention his tone is quite condescending.

Today he came to our apartment and started his regular. "It smells" "It's not clean". None of those comments were true by the way. I had just woken up and had not even started my day. I decided to stand up for myself. I told him off and said "Just give me some time I just woke up" and "Do you come every time just to start drama?". The second statement of mine kinda triggered him and he ran upto 3-4 inches away from my face, his fists tight, teeth all jittery, aggression in his eyes and voice, as if he wanted to hit me so bad. I told him "back off. why are you so close to me?". He didn't budge. He held on to his aggressive stance. My bf heard all of these commotion from washroom and came out midway to take a stand for me. He saw him and backed off.

Now it's past 1 am and I am still thinking about that incident. I was so scared in that moment. What if he had actually hit me? I am worried for all the women in his house. I am scared.

I have come away from home to a different city for studies, and ever since I have come to hostel, just like many hostelers I lost weight rapidly (according to my fam and friends), it changed my body shape, increase of hairfall, my dresses started to become loose for me and collar bone started to become more visible (I like it honestly that my collar bone is visible), but I still wish to lose more weight.

Recently my parents came to visit me and my mom and dad became shocked seeing me, and it honestly scared them very much.
I do agree that I was skipping meals more often and sleeping more (idk but I have become more sleepy and tired always ever since I have come to hostel), but I don't think I lost much weight and I still wish to lose more.

Before coming here, I used to be healthy but I didn't like the way my hands looked before, now they look thin and nice. I lost my face cheeks according to my dad and look tried always.
My parents are like order whatever I wish to eat and just it's okay to ditch studies and just to eat good food. And they are now asking me to send pic of my plate before and after eating (I just lied that I can't take my phone to mess to eat, so instead they call me after I eat to check whether have I eaten or not and ask my roommate to conform).

I feel that I am still heavy and I still wish to lose more and more weight, but I am struggling with lose of appetite, I can't eat in quantity I used to eat before at home. Honestly, I didn't properly check my weight on the weighing scale as I am scared to do so and don't know how much I lost weight in past 3 months but yes I do know that I did reduce my weight according to my family and friends and how loose my dresses have become.

TLDR: parents and friends think I lost lot of weight but in my opinion I didn't loose much and I wish to loose more in hostel but skipping meals is making sleepy and tried always.

I am 24(F) and I have just passed out from dental school. Now I am back to my town and living with my parents. Slowly it feels like it’s getting into my head! I am not confident enough and I am losing my control over my temper and getting triggered here and there! I feel like even though I am an adult they will control my life and will deny whatever I wanna do just because th try will simply think I can’t do it or may be they are parents and they are not comfortable!

So I have been in 3 relationships of around 2years each. so in the last 6 years I have never been single. Since the last 6 months I have not had that kind of emotional or physical affection.

Now I have recently had 2 interactions with guys which made me feel something.. like butterflies maybe? One just started drawing something on my hand with his fingers while he was driving, idk where that came from but he was so focused on drawing, we ended up missing our turn. He didn't do it again possibly because I was confused and never responded to his touch and he's a smart dude so understood I am probably not interested. Other one was at a party where someone who was literally only looking at me the whole party finally approached me and we hit it off. He somehow told me I am one of the best people he has ever met at a party. He has some sort of gaze where he was either looking nowhere or at me directly, he would especially look if some other guy came closer to me. at the end of the party when it was almost morning, he just stood next to me while I was blabbering and just let his hand slightly touch mine. I removed my hand but somehow our hands kept touching ugh. Post the party he even texted me if I would like to see the sunrise with him because he eavesdropped a convo I was having about how I love sunrise/sunsets. I ended up saying no because we did have a lot of chemistry. Both of these guys are interested in me but I really do not have the time Or strength to date and hookups dont align with my morals.

Idk how to stop this silly butterfly feeling which me making me crave physical initimacy so much. This is so silly but its always the small touches that drive me insane, like I can feel it throughout my body gosh. My ex and I's knees touched and I couldn't control my weird ass smile once. How do I stop feeling sooo touch deprived and lonely and not take the wrong step or diverge from my morals? I am having super impulsive thoughts because of the habit of touch I have had in the last few years. It has kind of become the only way I get comforted. These incidents are so silly but it's giving me this whole domino effect where I feel like I should let the touch happen

[29F] married [AM] for 3 years. We stayed with my in-laws for a little more than 1 year of our marriage. Husband is an only son & is very attached to his parents.

EXERTING DOMINANCE

I spent my early 20s ( after my masters) preparing for one of the toughest competitive exams with no luck. Wanted to attempt again after marriage, but my MiL thought otherwise.One day, soon after our wedding, she barged into my room and saw me studying. She clearly told me it was a bad idea ( 3 failed attempts) & I should do something that I am good at. She had this authoritative tone & must have spent close to 1 hour trying to change my mind. She asked me to decide in a week on what to do. Asked me to choose between attempting the exam again or doing a course that she suggested. I cried after she left. I didn't tell my husband about it, fearing it would put him in a tough spot. Anyways, I told her that I would do the said course. She was elated. I landed a job after that, didn't enjoy it one bit. It was highly exploitative as well. Everybody saw my plight and asked me to quit, saying it's okay. I am currently doing a distance course in a subject that I love along with preparing for the competitive exams secretly.

• DOESN'T LIKE ME VISITING MY HOME*

When we were staying with them, her face used to get clouded whenever the topic of me visiting my home came up. She used to even find reasons to stop that. Once we went to my home after 2 months, since DH was working remotely, we planned to stay for 2 weeks. His father called him back after a week, I thought there must be some emergency, but no. Such things have happened repeatedly. I don't tell her before I book my tickets now, I tell her one or two days before. Phew. Once I had to go home while they were visiting us ( my mother had a back injury and my father was going through a tough time personally, though my brother and wife were there, he asked me to come for few days), so after 3 days, my husband started telling me to come back & visit again once his parents have left. Apparently Mil complained about feeling lonely when he leaves for work.

I have tried talking to my husband about all this, but he gets extremely defensive and says she only wants the best for me & treats me like her own daughter ( complete BS). From wanting to spend every major festival at their house to giving unwarranted opinions on my outfit choices, I simply fail to like her even when she is nice to me. I wish I could genuinely like her, but I am not comfortable in her presence at all. Help!

Comment down your favourite cocktails. I'll be in charge of getting everyone drunk on my bestie's birthday and i want to do it right hahaha. Please don't mind the flair, i could not find any flair appropriate for this🥲

He says they weren’t, but he did ask me out 3 times and I always said no. He was my friend until he kept asking out. He said some unhinged racist things about my husband. Like he’s really insecure about my husband so he makes fun of him but calling him slurs related to his ethnicity. I called him and told him that I’m going to report him and he insists they weren’t for me but idk why I don’t believe him. I found his mother’s Instagram profile should I send the screenshots to her?

So i attended my friends wedding today. She is a dear friend and i was so eager/happy to see my friend getting married to her high school sweetheart.

Both have been dating since class 12th. Worked in same MNC after which the guy went to Paris, France to pursue his higher studies.

I was so elated to see that despite all the hurdles of long distance relationship, they still showed up strong. But i always noticed that she and that guy never really hung out together so much. I also saw very less activity on Instagram. Anyway i ignored it thinking that maybe thats the way they like it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Fast forward to the wedding day, until i reached the venue i was so happy. And then i saw swanky Audi A4 40 all dolled up at the venue.

and then saw few clippings where the dude is taking a hell lot of gold as “gift”.

i was shocked.

Despite being so progressive, there was still need to give dowry? and that too this is typical Love Marriage!!

I really respected the dude thinking that even when he was abroad he still chose my friend but seeing all these gifts/dowry gives me a feeling that maybe, he only strung it all along cuz he wanted Money? ☹️

So I see this a lot on the internet how creators etc talk about people only with bad mental health resort to hook ups however I know many people in personally (not very close tho) who get involved into all this but don’t seem to have mental health problems/ attachment issues.

They seem to have have casual sex (actually casually) without any problems or regretting it later.

What do you guys think? Would love to know your personal experiences on this.

The title

Long post with TLDR at the end.

Not generalising, just my experience. Not every older guy is a creep but most are. I did talk to guys my age & few years younger too, even they say silly things/ were annoying/ immature but never creepy. I’m not saying guys my age or younger are better, just that they don’t seem super desperat (probably have options), would give up if you end things and won’t say traumatising things. By older I mean people who are 3 years older or more than me.

First guy: 9 years older (met cause of work, I was an intern). He looked young for his age & was nice (till he started flirting). During this phase, I was more into older guys cause they were the ones approaching me more than guys my age + don’t know why but media romanticises older guys for teen girls so I blame that too. Back to the guy, he kept trying to sext and I was stupid enough to give in, the sexting was going fine till he talked about how he wanted to “drag me and force me to give him a blowjob & if I didn’t do it properly, I’d get mild slaps”, I didn’t reply to this so then he says how he’d do things to me while I’m sleeping. I was petrified and made an excuse about the age gap and avoided him. I know people are into such kinks but this is creepy if you’re saying that to someone you hardly know.

Second is the stalker, met him on b umble, was 4 years older and acted really nice for a week. Sent me pictures of girls he dated (one such pic was of them in bed and half naked) cause I called him a liar as a joke. He would brag about his desirability and money so much that I started avoiding him. I ended things so he created fake accounts to text me, even got a new number. He said it was my fault that I made him fall in love with me and now I ain’t reciprocating. He showed up at my college once and saw me with a male friend and concluded I was two timing. To get rid of him, I had to apologise for texting him on b umble and wasting his time. He ended up slut shaming me and said the worst possible things but then thankfully left.

Now, the creepiest one, obv met him on Reddit, texted me pretending to help. He was okay till he started flirting. Asked me if he could see me and I sent him my picture (without face, still a stupid move) and he said he likes how thin and tiny I am, kept trying to sext & get the “bold side of me out”. My reply was “WHAT?” and he goes on to explain his type, which is thin/ skinny girls who are really short (under 5’3), he knew I was 4’11 and said “you’re exactly my type, I’m assuming you have a very young looking face too”. This guy was almost 30, I gave him a chance to explain himself better but he kept on adding weird details. I assumed, he was probably under 5’6 and skinny so wanted someone similar out of his insecurity but then he sent me his picture, man was 5’8 and over weight. He legit looked like a father of two kids and was already balding but wanted a partner who looked like a child but of a legal age. I fought with him and blocked but he started cursing me from his alt and new account, I ended up deleting my account cause it was too exhausting.

These weren’t the only ones, been three years since I’m single and have talked to enough guys to reach this conclusion. Some older guys were homophobic, some kept forcing me to sext or meet them once, others were straight up rude and creepy. If I mention every creep I’ve met, this post would be never ending. Didn’t even realise how it was always the older one who left a bad taste till I was talking to a friend and she pointed out.

Most number of unsolicited dick pics I’ve received are from older ones and most of the groping or inappropriate actions I’ve faced in public were by again, the older ones, never a guy my age group.

I’m honestly traumatised and get icky whenever someone who’s even 4 years older tries to flirt or get close. I hate how I’m looking at every older guy with suspicious eyes cause obv not all of them are creeps, it’s hard to filter.

TLDR: sexted with a 9 yr older guy who wanted to drag me & force me for a blowjob + wanted to fuck when I’m was sleeping. Another older dude stalked me and then another one wanted a thin and tiny girl while he was balding and overweight, basically wanted a legal girl who looked like a child. Been three years to all of this so traumatised and genuinely scared of facing anyone who’s more than 3 yrs older.

So this is something personal, deeply intertwined with my thought process and probably not a sensible and logical line of thought. And I do not know how to not feel this way, not think awfully less of myself and feel decently good about myself.

In my earlier serious relationship with my ex I was physically intimate which I seriously considered will workout and we will end up together. However there were issues that couldn't be solved and we had to breakup. He turned verbally abusive and never really seemed to make efforts or care much about me.

Now I 24F, kind of regret the decision I took to be physically intimate with him. I believe I wanted to do it with someone 'more special, more right, more loving, more compatibile'. I have obviously completely given up on giving dating another chance and have decided to stay alone. But I feel somewhere this incidence and whole history of my past is also barrier preventing me from starting anything related to love. I feel less about myself, I regret my decision, and I feel I am not lovable anymore because of my past? I ideally wanted one person always kinda situation but it all went to trash. He would have probably moved on, will build a life with someone else. Why does he get to not have such a burden of chastity but I do?

I am a female in my teens and I think life.....is just not worth it.....everyday...life is just shitty as hell......I even wanted to run away from home sometimes....but always returned back....Study pressure is just too high for me....Family says to be scientists while I want to be in the Entertainment Industry...doesn't help the fact that I am a topper and that's why people, teachers and coaching teachers force me to study even harder....I have tried to end it all a few times but at the last moment I always stopped as I know how much high hopes and love and care my parents and teachers have towards me....whenever I meet my teachers.. they look at me and there is almost all the times a genuine smile on their face as they are happy to meet me always and they also chat with me in a friendly way ......my father separately made an area to hang all my medals and achievements as he is proud to display them...But me, I am just a fucking disappointment......I act terribly to my loved ones and I just hate myself.....I am just so confused now.

This thread is for all of you late night owls. All and any random discussions go. Post goes live everyday night at 9.00PM.

Be kind and be civil.

I'm so mad and fuming right now. I can actually feel the flames coming out.

I am visiting my family, and here we have the shared auto system. The auto fare was 10 rs and the auto driver tried to give me a torn 10 rs note. (I gave him 20rs note.) When I got the note, I inspected it, and thank God that I did, as it has a visible tear at the side of the note.

I had gone out with my friends, so I was dressed up to 9s and 10s, complete with glitter eyeshadow and visible lipstick.

I was traveling with 3 other random uncles (shared auto) all of whom paid the driver 10 rs each, and the auto driver claimed that he didn't have any change to pay me?! He even had the audacity to tell me that if you won't take the torn note, pay 10rs in change, even when the other 3 uncles paid him?

I'm pretty sure that he was thinking that just because I was dressed well, he could take advantage of me, as I wouldn't care if I loose 10rs? He even had the audacity to tell me that I can return him the money the next day, as if I would be there the next day?!

I got down at the auto stand (near my house) and got into a full fledged verbal argument and paid him in coins. That f-er even had the audacity to ask me how much I've paid him in coins?! I mean, it's 5 2rs coins, are you blind?!

He was saying that things like these happen regularly here, and everyone adjusts, still I didn't see you trying to take advantage of anyone else. If it's this common, why didn't you give that torn note to your 'regular' customer?! I know he wouldn't try and give that note to the people who is minimally involved in the political parties this close to the elections, but I'm okay?!

What bothered me the most is that my 20rs note wasn't torn. He could have gave that note to literally anyone. When I told him to change it, he should have done just that. He argued and tried to push me to accept it, when he could have literally given it to other customers in his next trip. If he accepted the note from someone else, it's his fault. He didn't give it to any guy who was on the shared trip. And I was expected to shut up and take it, because I look like it?!

Anyway, I'm glad that I argued and create a scene. I'm glad I didn't let anyone take advantage of me today. My family is a very old family in the locality. Since we are not living here anymore not everyone recognises us everytime.

Anyway, to all the makeup and fashion loving girlies out there don't let anyone take advantage of you because of how you look. If you are a local, let them know. Argue back. We are not walls who would accept their paan spit without fighting back.

32 ,F . I was in a relationship with a man last year. Long story short, he gave me the greatest heartbreak of my life. He was the centre of my universe. My days were only about him. But that SOB was cheating on me throughout the relationship while showing me dreams of our wedding. I was a virgin before and I had my every first with him. We were together for 1 year. And he broke up this January with him moving on immediately after the breakup. He didn't even have the courtesy to tell me that he doesnt want to be with me anymore, rather he put a picture of a girl on his private instagram story mentioning that she is the love of his life. The amount of shock I felt that day was beyond comprehension. It's been more than 4 months . I've spent so many days crying for him and grieving the loss I've felt. I really thought he was my forever. I feel guilty for ignoring the red flags. Now I'm at a very bad state mentally and emotionally and I really don't want to be with anyone right now , but there's a lot of pressure to get married. Infact for the very first time in my life I've seen a slight change in my parents behavior when I asked them to delay the process of AM. I had to give up and start looking for arranged marriage matches. The problem is first of all I don't find anyone attractive. Secondly If I find anything good about them , I somehow feel like I'm a fraud. Like I'm going to cheat on my shitty ex by forgetting the grieving feelings associated with him. Strangely I feel like I'm moving on too fast!! I feel bad for the man I'll end up with. And the worst of all , I see my ex in my dreams . Such intense dreams about him giving explanations for cheating, or him getting married , I'm often jolted up by such dreams and spent rest of the morning sleepless. And the entire day is ruined. I don't know what to do and how to deal with this. It feels like I'm trapped and I'll die like this. What should I do?

Thinking of creating a group chat here. I'm a smoker looking to quit. Also need to get a grip on how much I am drinking. Let me know if you want to be added! Larps stay away!

what do u girlies do with the bouquet of flowers that you get from your someone special or loved ones? :) (like next day and further on)

thank u :) <3

Pretty much same as the title only. How to deal with overthinking? I know a lot of people struggle with it..just putting up this question here so that the ones trying to get rid of it can help others by sharing what helped them. ✨✨

My friends from Europe are visiting, and they booked an AirBnB for over a month. She's an Indian women married to a French man. He was cooking for her, cleaning the place, doing dishes and basically everything without an ounce of ego and was so sweet.

My friend dated a lot during college, to the point where my other friends called her a bad words and stopped being friends with her. They told me to stay away from her because she will spoil me and what not. I admit, at one point her partying and drinking had me worried too.

But I feel so wholesome having seen her settle, so while we both went out for shopping I asked her if her past relationships were ever a problem, basically I wanted to know did he ever judge her for her past.

I know, wrong thing to ask. But she went to Europe after her fiancé called off the engagement because he thought she was used and she couldn’t love him and all. So I was a little curious.

She said this is a problem only in the Asian countries - men treating women like they own them, and not letting them have freedom or refusing to see them as a human being. For Indian men equality feels like discrimination.

Getting judged for partying, wearing short clothes, smoking, drinking, enjoying ourselves in any way possible is a problem for most men in India.

I do see extremely promising change in Gen Z and the newer generations, but I do feel Gen Z women (atleast the ones I have talked to) are against the idea of marriage, they want a partner but they don’t want to confine themselves to society's expectations for a women.

Ladies, I am in a city where I have no friends. I have been preparing for an exam and I haven’t been out in over a month. I need a break. I am thinking about going out for a beer or an LIIT alone. Kind of on the fence about the whole idea, if it will be awkward or people would be judgy?

Any of you have any experience going out alone for a drink or two?