Okay, just going to be honest for once; I was depressed for my sophomore and junior year in hs- fat, covid, no friends. But then my senior year of HS was the best year in my life- i got into my dream college, lost weight, got a beautiful girlfriend (still with her).

But ever since I started university (I am a sophomore now), I will be honest: I have not been happy. This is my dream college, but it is so hard, and the people around me seem smarter than me. I haven't had any internships and have had bad grades, while my friends have great internships and good grades.

I am writing this because I just took another test which I actually studied so much for but i didn't understand one question out of 5 so I'm already at a 80 (They make the tests extra hard bc Computer Science at t10 school) . I am crying right now and haven't felt good honestly since high school :( / been using drugs and stuff to cope.

IDK what to do i feel horrible and not content and have imposter syndrome; i want to win, get an internship get those grades, i feel like god doesn't want me to succeed no matter how much i put in the effort; I have been trying to stay stoic but this test i just took and honestly this semester made me break down; please help any advice is appreciated

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Discover timeless wisdom from Stoic philosophers with powerful lessons on resilience, focus, and inner peace. This video dives into the teachings of Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and others to help you face life’s challenges with strength and clarity. Perfect for anyone seeking a grounded mindset in today's chaotic world.

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“So, for instance, the distress I feel in learning that I have heart disease involves my mind’s assent to the proposition that illness is both present and something bad – where ‘bad’ carries the eudaimonist connotation of being deleterious to my happiness (Cooper 1999b). This thought is false, of course: disease is dis-preferred, but not bad, and its presence makes no difference to my happiness. My case of distress, then, involves a cognitive failure, according to the Stoics: in suffering this passion, I have incorrectly evaluated illness and misjudged its connection to my own personal flourishing. As part of my distress, I may also experience anxious internal constricting and start to weep, as a result of my mind’s assessment that such actions are appropriate responses to my present illness (element (ii) above). On the Stoic view, this assessment is also false, for these are not objectively appropriate reactions to the presence of something bad (cf. the more complicated Alcibiades case, discussed by Graver 2007, ch. 9).”

•	Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy.

Reading this really does it for me. I’m so done. I’ve been told over and over again that being a Stoic does not require one to be unfeeling, uncaring, or sociopathic, but the more I read about the philosophy, the more I feel confident that the negative things I’ve heard about Stoicism are true.

I struggle heavily with depression, anxiety, OCD, suicidal ideation, and trauma from my past. Whenever I am experiencing a difficult emotion, whether it be sadness, anger, jealousy, I want to feel through it, understand it, process it, learn from it. This is in contrast to the view of the Stoics, which states that those emotions are merely troublesome passions which one should aim to eliminate.

I couldn’t disagree with them more. While those feelings are definitely burdensome, I believe they have their worth; they can even serve us if we interact with them in a wise manner.

Sadness is painful, but it is also beautiful; it helps me to understand myself better, reconnect with the things and people I’ve lost, and heal and grow as a person.

Anger can be problematic if it leads to wrath, but if managed in a healthy manner in can also be ordered towards righteous purposes. In my opinion, feeling frustrated or angered by injustices in the world is not a bad thing – if anything, it’s a sign of a good moral compass. What matters is what we choose to DO with that anger and how we let it affect us.

Anxiety and fear can ruin us if they are left unmanaged, but if they are kept in check they can also be experienced in a healthy manner. Fear can show us where the edge is, anxiety can show us threats in our vicinity. The natural purpose of these emotions is literally to protect us.

In my opinion, feeling and indulging these emotions is not the problem. The problem arises when these emotions cause us to behave immorally. We mustn’t let feelings of anger lead to wrath, feelings of sadness to defeat, feelings of envy to ungratefulness or resentment.

Like, the quote at the top of this post is really what gets me. It’s basically saying that experiencing a possibly life-threatening illness cannot be considered bad, but feeling scared and crying about it is bad. That’s literally sounds like something a sociopath would say.

What about the people who have suffered through abuse, neglect, sexual assault? Are they just supposed to tell themselves “the things that happened to me are not bad, I’m bad for feeling bad about them. I am hurt the moment I believe myself to be. It is not things that upset us, but our perceptions of those things”?

I’m getting so tired of this philosophy and I just want to give up.

I would just like to have some input and hear your thoughts.

I just put in my two week notice at a job I genuinely enjoyed. I’m spending my last days as a Sergeant with my local Sheriff’s department. I was a shift supervisor at the correctional facility and supervised 20 Deputies. I could use stoicism to be a calm decisive leader, I built their leadership and decision making skills. My deputies did great work and they were calm and helped people. I really felt like i was creating a great environment for them, while also creating great officers that genuinely cared for the public. I loved being part of the solution for problems police face.

I was a squad leader for CERT (corrections emergency response team). I de-escelated barricaded inmates, and riots. I stopped alot of people from getting Hurt. I conducted training as well as operations planning. Many inmates have thanked me for helping them.

Not only that but i talked one-on-one with inmates and gave them great advice. We have GED and job training programs and I really helped alot of those people and got thanked regularly by inmates, as well as meeting them after their incaceration in public and seeing them turn their lives around.

For the most honest selfless and genuine reasons, i loves my job.

But hours were horrible, i missed birthdays and holidays, i switched from day shift to night shift every month. And worse of all we were living less than paycheck to paycheck. I know money is not everything, but we own the bear necessities and didnt make enough money. I wasn’t supporting my family like i should have, and i can no longer supplement our income with Overtime because my wife is sick.

It was a job i spent half a decade working towards and two years loving my positive impact. Im leaving the brothers and sisters I met, struggled with, helped in crises both professional and personal.

But i know my duty to my family supersedes these things

I took a job in my fathers company as a construction worker with plans on carrying our company to the next generation.

I know these things shouldnt matter, and i know i’ find purpose in my new career. It was the only choice for my family, but its still upsetting. I wish my career with the sherrif’s office supported my family but it doesn’t and it would have been selfish to stay.

I just wish it could have worked out.

If you took the time to read any of this I thank you. Any and all feedback would be appreciated.

Amor Fati <3

Manipulation breaks me and makes me want to cry. How do you deal with stress. I fear the outside world a lot . Or being out in the world

• A person who always lived a sheltered life.

Discover the timeless wisdom of Marcus Aurelius on finding peace by accepting life's challenges. Learn how to let go of constant desires and embrace the power of acceptance in a world that’s always changing.

https://youtu.be/aLmz3x0jEBo

In this video I discuss how stoic philosopher's use certain principles and habit to escape the vicious cycle of lust and how to master self control over your own mind

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