Assalamualikum, looking for a life partner. I am south Asian and an engineer. Reach out if you are interested.

As-salamu alaykum wa ramatulahi wa barakatuh, ekhwati and akhwati.

Just wondering what has been everyone’s experience and if perhaps the generations before us did things the right way. Or perhaps things better now?

In places like India and Pakistan and some others, the culture of arranged marriage is still very strong and very prevalent.

All opinions are welcome.

Salaam,

I’m hoping to find a partner to build a loving and trusting marriage together.

I am currently studying in the UK and would like to settle down within the next year inshAllah.

Hello sisters.

I am 25 year old. Looking for a life partner.

A software developer working with Google.

Have my own house. Looking for someone to build a life with and have some fun in life.

Please reach out should you be interested.😊

Salaam everyone,

After spending time on this platform and speaking to people from different backgrounds, I’ve come across something that deeply concerns me. Many wonderful sisters here are looking for a sincere, God-fearing spouse. But I’ve noticed that some men approach marriage without genuine intentions, using manipulative tactics to attract interest, only to disappoint and hurt in the end. It pains me to see this pattern, and I feel a responsibility to share what I’ve observed so that, insha'Allah, it may help you make more informed decisions.

Here are some key signs and strategies I’ve learned that may help you discern a person’s true intentions. Remember, these aren’t foolproof, but they can provide guidance to help you recognize sincerity and protect your heart.

1. Look for Depth and Consistency

• What to Watch For: Sincere individuals don’t rush things, and they approach marriage thoughtfully. Someone who genuinely cares will have consistent actions and words over time. Be cautious if his behavior changes depending on his mood, your reactions, or who else is watching. Consistency is a foundation of integrity.
• Why It Matters: Someone who changes their behavior frequently or acts in a “too good to be true” way might be putting on a show. Authenticity tends to remain steady, while false intentions will fluctuate.

2. Genuine Interest in Your Values, Not Just Surface-Level Qualities

• What to Watch For: Notice if he’s curious about your beliefs, goals, and values, not just your appearance or basic details. A sincere man will take the time to get to know what matters to you and will encourage discussions about compatibility, faith, and family.
• Why It Matters: A man who focuses only on the superficial often lacks depth in his commitment. Marriage is about partnership and shared values, not just initial attraction. Someone interested in building a future will ask questions that reflect a genuine curiosity about who you are.

3. Respect for Boundaries and Comfort Zones

• What to Watch For: A man who respects you will honor your boundaries, both emotional and physical. He won’t pressure you for personal information early on, and he will respect your timeline for involving family members or having deeper conversations.
• Why It Matters: Respect is non-negotiable. When a man respects your limits, he’s showing that he values your comfort and autonomy. If he pushes boundaries or makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s a sign that he may lack the respect required for a balanced, loving relationship.

4. Transparency and Honesty in Communication

• What to Watch For: Pay attention to whether he is open about his own background, life goals, and even flaws. If he avoids certain topics or gives vague answers, it might indicate he’s not being fully transparent. Sincerity often comes with vulnerability; a genuine person won’t be afraid to share details about his journey.
• Why It Matters: A marriage is a partnership that requires honesty. A person who avoids transparency might be hiding aspects of their life, and you deserve someone who’s willing to be open, even if it’s difficult.

5. Willingness to Involve Family and Friends

• What to Watch For: While everyone’s timeline is different, a sincere man won’t avoid family involvement indefinitely. A healthy relationship includes building bonds with family and friends as a way to form a strong support network. If he avoids bringing family into the conversation, ask yourself why.
• Why It Matters: Family involvement in marriage discussions often solidifies intentions and provides accountability. A man who is genuinely invested will not hesitate to include those closest to him, showing that he’s proud to introduce you to his life.

6. Open to Discussing Challenges and Differences

• What to Watch For: Marriage involves navigating life’s ups and downs, and a serious man will be open to discussing potential challenges, even if they’re uncomfortable. Avoiding real-life topics like finances, family expectations, or values differences is often a sign of immaturity or avoidance.
• Why It Matters: Facing issues head-on is a sign of maturity and readiness for marriage. A person who isn’t ready for these conversations may not be ready for the commitment that marriage requires.

7. Trust Your Intuition and Take Your Time

• What to Watch For: If you have doubts, listen to them. Your intuition is a powerful tool, especially when coupled with guidance from prayer and reflection. Don’t ignore small red flags or any uneasy feelings. If he’s truly interested, he will respect your pace and won’t rush the process.
• Why It Matters: Many people have a “gut feeling” when something is off, and often, this feeling is there for a reason. Give yourself the space and time to observe fully, and let your intuition guide you.

These observations aren’t meant to create fear or suspicion, but rather to equip you with the knowledge to identify sincerity and protect your heart. You deserve a partner who values you deeply and shares a vision for a meaningful, faithful marriage. Remember, you are worthy of respect, love, and honesty. Trust that with patience, faith, and clarity, you will find someone who embodies these values.

May Allah guide you to a spouse who brings out the best in you, respects you wholly, and helps you grow in faith and love. And please, if you have other insights, share them here. Together, we can support each other in finding the right person, insha'Allah.

I am a Shia muslim 42 year old divorced man with no kids living in USA. I am well educated and working as Director in fortune 500 company. Looking for a girl prefereably divorced with no kids and aged 30 - 35 having an educated background and good sense of humor.

As Salam Alaikum,

I am 34 M based out of the East Coast in the US(Separated and waiting for legal divorce). I am 5'8" in height with average built. Completed Master's in engineering with a job paying job in a multinational company. I am Indian by ethnicity but wouldn't mind other ethnicities too. Please reach out if interested.

Male US Citizen currently living in Karachi, DHA 29, BA from University of Texas at Austin

Height: 5’11 Sect: Shia Syed Siblings: One sister, married Father’s occupation: Business owner Mother’s occupation: Housewife/runs a salon

About me: I graduated in 2018, and have since lived in various USA cities, including New York City, Chicago, and Atlanta. Currently in Karachi for a career shift.

Skills: Cooking, Art, Writing

Requirements: Well-settled with a career. Preferably abroad (USA, UK, Europe), but willing to consider locals as well. Seeking ambitious, clear-headed and emotionally intelligent individuals. The more educated, the better.

38 M, US physician looking for someone to join my family. Older or younger is ok, good muslimah is important. PM for details

Looking for a friend: She is in love with her fate, 31 years old, beautiful, successful, best family background, European citizen. Entrepreneur. Absolutle discretion assured. A dedicated and educated Shia male would be her choice. Please send a pm. Thank you.

salaam everyone,

In Shia teachings, marriage is often described as a union not just of two people, but of two souls committed to supporting one another in faith, love, and personal growth. Imam Ali (AS) said, "A woman is a flower, not a servant"—a reminder that marriage is a partnership rooted in kindness and respect. Similarly, it’s taught that spouses are “garments” for one another, meaning they offer comfort, protection, and dignity.

After a 10-year marriage that ultimately ended in divorce, I found myself reflecting on the entire journey—what went right, what went wrong, and all the lessons that could have made a difference. When I first joined this community, I was hoping to meet someone new and start fresh. I spoke with a few people, both men and women, and it hit me: many people are searching for a spouse but may not fully understand the depth of what marriage truly is.

I’m sharing my experiences here, not to discourage anyone but to shed light on what I wish I’d known. Hopefully, these insights will be helpful to anyone seriously considering marriage or looking to strengthen their current relationship.

1. Intentions Matter More Than We Realize

When I first got married, I thought love alone would carry us through anything. But over the years, I realized that the foundation of a relationship isn’t just emotions; it’s intentions. Having clear, shared intentions from the beginning what we both wanted from life, our values, our commitment to support each other would have helped us steer through the tougher times. Start your marriage with sincerity and know why you’re committing to each other.

2. Don’t Overlook Small Acts of Kindness

It’s easy to assume that grand gestures will keep the spark alive, but I found that small, consistent acts of kindness build a stronger bond over time. A gentle word, a little patience, or even just a smile after a long day speaks volumes. The daily, quiet kindnesses we often overlook are the glue that holds everything together. Over time, I think we forgot this, focusing too much on what wasn’t working rather than nurturing each other in small ways.

3. Communication is Hard, But it’s the Backbone

People say “communicate” all the time, but let’s be real—it’s not as easy as it sounds. For years, I didn’t know how to express my feelings without holding back or without frustration. We had different communication styles, which sometimes made us feel worlds apart. I learned that communication is a skill you work on continuously. It means being honest, patient, and humble enough to listen without ego. If I had practiced this earlier, maybe we could’ve navigated conflicts better.

4. Value Growth in Yourself and Each Other

One of my biggest regrets is that we didn’t focus on growing together as individuals. Marriage should be a journey where you’re both evolving, learning, and pushing each other towards personal betterment. I learned too late that a healthy marriage is one where each person is supportive of the other’s growth not threatened by it. If you see your partner growing, encourage them. Celebrate their wins, and let them do the same for you.

5. Don’t Carry Resentments; Address Them Early

Over time, small grievances and unspoken feelings can turn into resentment. I let issues pile up, hoping they’d resolve on their own, but they rarely do. When you let them fester, they turn into silent barriers. Now I know that when something bothers you, you need to bring it up respectfully and work through it together. An open heart, no matter how difficult the conversation, will save you so much pain down the line.

6. Understand That It’s Not Always About Winning

Looking back, I wish I had focused less on being “right” and more on understanding my partner’s perspective. Sometimes, in the heat of disagreements, I felt the need to prove my point, and it drove a wedge between us. Remember that you and your spouse are on the same team. There’s no winning if it comes at the cost of peace in your relationship.

7. Patience and Forgiveness Are Your Best Friends

Marriage is full of moments where you’ll need patience and forgiveness. There were times when I was quick to point out flaws and mistakes, but rarely stopped to think about the effect of my words. Learning to forgive genuinely—not holding grudges—is key to a peaceful relationship. Forgiveness doesn’t mean ignoring what hurt you; it means choosing to move forward without bitterness.

8. Remember That Faith is a Guiding Light

Throughout my journey, the principles of patience, compassion, and mutual respect kept me grounded. Whether it was enduring hardships, finding compassion during disagreements, or simply reminding myself of the blessings we shared, my faith reminded me of a bigger picture. Leaning on these values, even in the hardest times, gave me peace and perspective.

My Takeaway

While my marriage ultimately ended, I carry these lessons with me. I hope sharing them can help anyone else out there trying to build or sustain a marriage. Every relationship has its ups and downs, and none of us are perfect, but we can always learn from each other.

If there’s one thing I’d say to anyone getting married or working through marital challenges, it’s this: cherish and respect each other, forgive easily, and grow together. Because even if things don’t work out in the end, at least you’ll know you did your best.

Curious if this subreddit is even worth the time.

In the DFW (Texas) and Irving, Dallas, Mid Cities area... where can we find Outings for toddlers or the general family members such as mom & dad with or without thr kids; that replace western activities and holidays (Easter/thanks giving & 🎃 Halloween). Things for 3-6 year olds to interact and do in a halal way that the whole family can enjoy together?

Age and gender: 27. Male Age range: 20-27 Location: Sydney, Australia. Not willing to relocate Ethnicity: Lebanese - open to mixing Marital status: previously engaged. Ideal marriage timeline: around 1 year or less inshallah Characteristics:

1. caring
2. compassionate
3. humour
4. family orientated
5. affectionate

Religiosity: prayer, fast, attend masjid regularly.

Alhamdulliah I’m still on my journey everyday. I take my religion very seriously and inshallah am looking for someone who does too.

After a woman who is feminine and wants a man to lead. Also supporting the Palestinian cause is essential, whether it is through protests, donating etc whatever is in your capacity.

Kids: I want kids inshallah

3 hobbies:

1. gym/exercising I value healthy lifestyle
2. hiking/adventures
3. tennis

I am very open to try new things and am excited to grow together with my future wife inshallah :)

Assalamu Alaikum!

I have been reflecting on the beautiful diversity within our Shia Muslim communities, especially when it comes to marriage traditions. Each culture brings its unique flavor to weddings, from the customs surrounding the Nikah to the celebrations that follow.

I recently explored various cultural practices around Shia marriages with Azwaaja to Connecting Shia Muslims Worldwide and it sparked my curiosity about the specific traditions that hold special meaning for all of you.

What are some unique rituals or customs in your community that you feel enrich the marriage experience?

Let’s share our experiences and learn from each other’s cultures.

Salaam everyone,

Over the years, I've noticed how challenging it can be to find a partner who aligns not only with our faith but also with our personal values and goals. I’ve seen how many of us are torn between upholding the deep-rooted traditions of our community and navigating the realities of modern life. Whether it’s living in a place with a small Shia population or balancing career, family, and spiritual growth, the journey can feel overwhelming.

From my own experience, I’ve realized that the pressure to conform to certain timelines and expectations often leaves us feeling rushed or even inadequate. There’s this unspoken pressure to marry at a certain age or in a certain way, which can sometimes overshadow what should be a thoughtful, personal decision. The idea of marriage in Islam is sacred, built on mutual understanding, compassion, and shared faith, but it’s easy to get caught up in external expectations.

I’ve also come to believe that while tradition is important, it’s equally important to find someone who sees marriage as a partnership of growth spiritually, emotionally, and intellectually. It’s about building a life together, where both people respect and encourage each other’s journey, and not just ticking the boxes of what's expected. This requires patience, openness, and sometimes the difficult task of not rushing the process.

One of the hardest things for me has been finding someone who genuinely values deep conversations and is willing to take the time to really understand and grow with their partner. Many people are supportive, but it’s rare to find that deeper connection where both individuals are working toward the same spiritual and life goals.

It’s a journey many of us in the Shia community are on balancing faith, personal growth, and the realities of today’s world. For those who have been on this path, I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences. We’re all navigating this together, and it’s always encouraging to know that we’re not alone in these challenges.

Posting again:

Salam, im a Pakistani based in Germany pursuing my post graduate studies in Electrical Engineering. Im 6’0 ft in height. Im searching for a practising shia partner to settle down and start my family.

Some further details about me: Im a Kazmi Syed (we have our maintained and documented family tree tracing our lineage to Imam Musa Al Kazim as). Im a practising shia and my beliefs are at the core of my personality. A taqleedi and follower of Sayyed Khamenei (if this is important for you to know).

My parents are based in Pakistan along my elder siblings.

Dm if you are interested :)

As-Salaam-Alaikum

About me: I'm a 25 year old software engineer, currently doing post graduate studies in Dublin, Ireland. I'm a 6'1 guy, religious(not extremely) try to pray 5 times a day, value faith, I'm originally from Pakistan, Also I'm a sushi .i.e my mother is a converted shia but a syed(maternal family still sunni), looking to get married within a year after completing my degree in 2025. Hobbies: Likes to hangout with friends, watch movies and tv shows, go for a queit walk sometimes, playing fifa sometimes, Likes to try different foods and cook myself sometimes, and traveling

Looking for: Someone similar my age +- and same education will be preffered as its easy to understand eachothers jobs and careers Prefers someone from Pakistan back so that it'll be easier for communication and understanding cultural values Someone with moderate religious values and try to be become a better person together

If you're serious and interested in getting to know each other then send me a DM with some details about yourself

Salam everyone

I’m 25 years old living in Southern California from Lebanon seeking marriage. Born and lived in California my whole life. Fluent in Arabic.

• graduated with a business degree and have been working for about 4 years now.
• Looking for a Lebanese girl preferably between ages 22-25
• I am 5’10, workout out and exercise almost everyday
• I don’t drink, don’t smoke. I pray/fast/ only eat halal

Feel free to dm me.

Assalam Aliakum forty eight year young female seeking a spouse for never ending roller coaster. I have found it hard to find a husband my age due to the fact that I am a convert and many Muslims believe I should craw inside myself put on black and die. Life is a beach!

Salaam everyone,

I'm a 24-year-old Shia Muslim, living in the US and working as a software engineer. Alhamdulillah, I recently bought my first house and am really excited about this new chapter in life. Now that I’ve got a solid foundation, the one thing missing is someone to share it with.

A bit about me: I’m hardworking, family-oriented, and enjoy learning new things (both in tech and outside of it). In my free time, I like spending time with family, exploring new places, and improving myself in different ways. I value faith, mutual respect, and communication in relationships, and I’m hoping to find someone who shares similar values.

If you think we might be a good match or would like to know more, feel free to reach out!

Best wishes to everyone in finding their right partner, inshaAllah!

Hello everyone,

My name is Reza, and I’m excited to introduce myself here. I’m 30 years old and originally from Tehran, Iran, but I’ve called Brisbane home for the past 18 years. Life has taken me on quite a journey, and I’m grateful for the experiences that have shaped me into who I am today.

A bit about my background: I’m deeply involved in marketing, business development, and operations. Over the years, I’ve gained hands-on experience in a variety of fields. From starting my own branding and marketing business to working in sales and other roles, I’ve learned a lot through self-teaching and dedication. I enjoy exploring new areas, understanding business challenges, and helping companies grow by leveraging unconventional strategies.

One of my greatest passions in life is helping people and understanding human consciousness how we think, feel, and connect. I’m especially drawn to supporting others mentally, and I find great fulfillment in making a positive impact on people’s lives.

I was married from the age of 18 until 28, but unfortunately, things didn’t work out. However, this experience taught me a lot about relationships, myself, and what I hope to find in a future partner. After taking time to focus on personal growth, I feel ready to open my heart to someone new.

I’m looking for someone with similar values and who’s ready to build a relationship based on trust, mutual respect, and growth. I value kindness, empathy, and a positive outlook on life, and I hope to find someone who also believes in those qualities.

If this resonates with you, or if you’d like to get to know me better, feel free to reach out. I’d love to connect and see where it leads.

Thanks for taking the time to read my post, and I wish everyone here the best on their own journeys!

Warm regards, Reza

Former part-time warehouse worker.

I am looking for a wife with kind heart and chill.

Religiosity doesn’t matter but I hope she could

hold same position in faith.

I don’t drink alcohol and never touched a pork except in very rare cases.

Jazakallah!

Well I met a girl in app and she said what is my sect. And I said does it matter and she said positively, so I said I don’t want to debate here.

And… she unmatched me.

So sad. She was absolutely my style.

Wish me luck!

Salam, im a Pakistani based in Germany pursuing my post graduate studies in Electrical Engineering. Im 6’0 ft in height. Im searching for a practising shia partner to settle down and start my family.

Some further details about me: Im a Kazmi Syed (we have our maintained and documented family tree tracing our lineage to Imam Musa Al Kazim as). Im a practising shia and my beliefs are at the core of my personality. A taqleedi and follower of Sayyed Khamenei (if this is important for you to know).

My parents are based in Pakistan along my elder siblings.

Dm if you are interested :)

Hi

About me: I will graduate in 2026 from medschoool, and currently I'm living in Italy (originally Iranian) but after I graduate I'll move to UK and start my residency I'm looking for someone preferably seeking ambitious, clear-headed and emotionally intelligent individuals. The more educated, the better.

Giving this a try, planning on shifting to the states or UK for residency.

Gender: Female Age: 34 Nationality: British Location: Glasgow, Scotland Origin: Pakistan Occupation: Works at Solicitors M-Status: Unmarried Family: 3 sisters and 1 brother, live at home with parents in Glasgow. Father: Ex-Pakistani Air Force employee(early retirement), currently working as a taxi driver. Mother: Carer Education: IT BSc Height: 5’7 Caste: Rajput/Shia

I have been living in Glasgow with my family for the past 17 years, I am a devout Muslim, observe regular prayers and follow Islamic principles. I work full-time and on my days off I spend time with my family and friends. I had health concerns in the past, but Alhamdulillah I am well and believe in maintaining a healthy lifestyle, regularly attend exercise classes, go out for long nature walks and occasional hill climbing. I am looking for a partner who is a practicing Muslim and has similar values to me. Someone who is established in their career and has attained higher education. I would like to travel some more in the future, perform Umra and Hajj as soon as possible and would love the opportunity to go back to Arba’een in the future.

Aslam Alikum, I'm Syed Hur, a 26-year-old Data Scientist living in West London. My life revolves around faith, upholding moral values, and showing deep respect for elders. I strive to maintain a balance between embracing modern thinking while holding onto the wisdom and traditions passed down by our ancestors.

I’m a caring and hardworking individual with a passion for writing, staying active through sports, and exploring nature through hiking. I hope this gives you a glimpse of who I am, and I look forward to connecting with someone who shares similar values.

Male US Citizen currently living in Karachi, DHA 29, BA from University of Texas at Austin

Height: 5’11 Sect: Shia Syed Siblings: One sister, married Father’s occupation: Business owner Mother’s occupation: Housewife/runs a salon

About me: I graduated in 2018, and have since lived in various USA cities, including New York City, Chicago, and Atlanta. Currently in Karachi for a career shift.

Skills: Cooking, Art, Writing

Requirements: Well-settled with a career. Preferably abroad (USA, UK, Europe), but willing to consider locals as well. Seeking ambitious, clear-headed and emotionally intelligent individuals. The more educated, the better.