Hello everyone - this community is in need of a few new mods and you can use the comments on this post to let us know why you’d like to be a mod.

Priority is given to redditors who have past activity in this community or other communities with related topics. It’s okay if you don’t have previous mod experience and, when possible, we will add several moderators so you can work together to build the community. Please use at least 3 sentences to explain why you’d like to be a mod and share what moderation experience you have (if any).

Comments from those making repeated asks to adopt communities or that are off topic will be removed.

Hello everyone, My first post so I'm sorry if I screw anything up. I need help with the guilt I feel when I spend money on things I enjoy. The reason is that I'm a big animal advocate and I donate whatever I can to various organizations and charities. If I could donate all my "extra" money to help as many animals as i could. Any advice is greatly appreciated!

Hi everyone,

I'm not sure where else to turn, so I'm reaching out here for advice and insight. Lately, I've been struggling a lot with myself, and I feel completely empty inside- emotionally, mentally, and even physically drained. I have tasks to complete, like school projects and games I've bought, like Minecraft, that I used to enjoy. But now, nothing feels meaningful anymore.

Over the past few weeks, I've been reflecting on my behavior and feelings, and I suspect I may have multiple mental health conditions. After sharing everything in detail with ChatGPT, it suggested that I might have traits or symptoms of depression, ADHD, autism, and possibly something else. I know it's not a diagnosis, but based on what I've read and experienced, I think these could be possibilities:

• Depression: I feel numb, unmotivated, and hopeless. I have a lot of suicidal thoughts that come and go, and I've started losing interest even in things I used to love, like anime, manga, and gaming.

• ADHD: My mind feels chaotic. It's hard to stay focused, I get restless, and I often jump between tasks without finishing anything.

• Autism: I've always been socially different. I avoid relationships, hate most interactions, and have never had real friends in person. I also talk to myself or imaginary characters instinctively, even though I know they're not real.

• Emotional detachment: I struggle with anger, and I often think about how peaceful death feels. I don't feel connected to my family or friends, and even though people talk to me, it feels like love and respect are conditional.

There's more to it. I don't remember much about my past, especially after 10th grade(Currently at the end of 11th grade). I can't recall things clearly, and it's like my memory is fading. I've also grown tired of the societal norms and expectations that seem unfair, especially as a man.

Right now, I can't afford professional help because my family isn't well off, and we already struggle with basic physical health expenses. So, I feel stuck. I know I need help, but I don't know where to start.

PS- I live in Delhi,India

18M. Hello everyone. I'm at a stage where I no longer feel like myself. I've lost interest in everything, I doubt that I really feel anything. There are people I enjoy communicating with and it brings me pleasure, but I think I attach too much importance to it. I don't have any friends or relatives. There is a person with whom I enjoy communicating and I would like to become closer, but I don't really see same initiative in my direction. I want to find, accept and love myself. I would appreciate book recommendations. No need to write that I am still young and don't need to worry. I want to solve this problem now or in the near future, I don't want to close my eyes to it.

no one knows of this acc so screw it. it seems like no one actually wants to talk to me anym and i cant talk to someone bc they end up just brushing me off which honestly, sucks ass

100 reasons to leave, 1 reason to stay

1. my body
2. my acne
3. my personality
4. academic pressure
5. doubt
6. lack of trust
7. too quiet at times
8. exhaustion
9. no excitement
10. fake friends
11. overthinking
12. problems with my self esteem
13. feeling like people hate me
14. fat
15. pressure to fit in or be normal
16. being overwhelmed
17. unanswered questions
18. social media
19. society
20. always sensitive
21. jealousy
22. ugly
23. expectations by people
24. unfufilled goals
25. trapped in a friendship i wanna leave
26. toxic people around me
27. getting shit talked about
28. stress
29. poor communication
30. not smart enough
31. being left out
32. not good enough for anyone
33. fear
34. not being able to do things other people feel easy
35. unatheletic
36. my weight
37. my height
38. my size
39. my body
40. my life
41. lies fed to me
42. being gullible
43. hatred towards many things
44. I cant change
45. change
46. disrespect
47. not given enough opportunities
48. slow growth
49. weird voice
50. lack of empathy for others
51. constantly tired
52. bad habits
53. heavy heart
54. cluttered mind
55. being ignored
56. lack of appreciation
57. the world around us
58. disregarded opinions
59. lonliness
60. weird
61. friendships
62. being misunderstood
63. hated by peers
64. negative self talk
65. academics
66. burnt out.
67. no purpose in life
68. school environment
69. lack of motivation
70. trust issues
71. feeling of being used
72. annoyed
73. anger at the simplest things
74. unhappy
75. lack of support
76. teachers
77. fazing out
78. irritation
79. question myself why
80. lack of effort in everyday tasks
81. cries easily
82. sick and tired
83. my body
84. my body
85. my body
86. what others say
87. being so stupid as to trusting someone
88. effect of social media
89. screentime
90. feeling empty
91. all i think about is the words she said
92. being greatly affected by others
93. fast to anger
94. feeling useless
95. wanting to sleep all day
96. unsatisfied body goals
97. fatshaming
98. loss of peace
99. being forgotten
100. My weight.

Reason to stay:

1. myself?

Quitting weed

I guess this is more of a venting post. But any advice or anything, is more than appreciated. It will be a long post.. sorry not sorry. Thanks for even reading let alone responding.

I just turned 30 a few days ago, not that it matters all that much. I've had and still do have anxiety since I was in elementary school and wasn't diagnosed until middle school by a psychiatrist and psychologist. Dropped out in10th grade and started working construction and have been the past 10-12years.

I've used weed from about 15yr old to 27yr old heavily and it seemed to "help" my anxiety more than it doesnt... or atleast that's what I gather from it. The past 2 or 3 years, I've been in a cycle of stopping smoking weed for about 3-4 months and then using it again for about 3-4 months. I love my sober self more although I'm a lot more irritable even months and months after stopping, which is about the only thing I've noticed in terms of a downside. The first week or two sucks after quitting but it gets better and evens out fast.

I'm at a point in my life where I have no idea what I'm doing. I have no direction nor structure. I let my anxiety still bother me and hinder me no matter how hard I try to manage it. My dad went to prison for 7years when I was about 2 or 3 yr old and my mom married my stepdad. My stepdad and I have absolutely never had a good relationship, ever. Unfortunately?..

I connected with my dad when I was about 16yr old and it was all strange to me since I never really knew him to begin with. My dad has always had a painting company even before he got locked up and still does to this day and has done and still is doing great for himself and his family.

This anxiety I struggle with kills me when it comes to working a job. I go to bed around 7:30p or 8:30p and wake up early around 4 or 5am every single day. If I sleep past 4 or 5am, it gives me bad anxiety when I wake up and I can't seem to catch my balance.

Throughout middle school and the little bit of high school, I was prescribed every SSRI under the sun, adderall and three different benzos and nothing seemed to help me other than weed?? Idk tbh. I really don't.

Where I'm getting at is.. when I go work for my dad in east texas (I live in North tx), I don't have the anxiety like I do here. Even though me and my dad never really had a relationship... I don't feel near as much anxiety when I work with him or when im out in east texas in general.

I'm the type of dude who likes to wake up.. sit for about 10-20min and then go to work. It's when i wake up and sit for hours and hours before work that kills me. The anticipation of just sitting there and waiting to go to work drives me insane and then dealing with the hellish dallas traffic is another story lol.

When im in east texas it's a lot more chill but the thing is I'm working with my dad for 8hrs and then coming home to him and it's never worked out for more than about 6 months or so. I've worked with him on and off from 23yr old to now at 30yr old. I don't have the funds to get my own place unfortunately or else I would instantly get a spot in east texas and work for/with my dad.

I'm at this point where I'm wanting to fully be done with weed and I want to find "my true calling" if you will. I just hate waking up with this anxiety and it's been like this for as far back as I can remember.

My anxiety was at its worst when I was in middle and high school and was diagnosed with borderline agoraphobia. I know it's still here and I have been letting it control me so much. I cannot get a grasp on it. I can't hold a steady job even tho ALL I WANT TO DO IS WORK lol. No one around me even remotely understands how this shit feels. We all have anxiety, i get that. But some have it more and some deal with better/ differently than others.

I have no idea what I'm doing and have no idea how people can "power" through like they do. I commend yall.

Thanks again for reading and hope your day is great. ✌️.

https://youtu.be/iAT6wSqItCs?si=_BHn34530WtC9Z6K This is really a gem!

Yk things you should not be even thinking that don’t even come up in real life…but you just tend to think about them in an abstract manner of what ifs…fuck man why do people with intellect and above average iq have to be made so self aware and thoughtful about dumb things…why the fuck do i need to carry the weight of all of the world’s problems over my shoulders thinking why the fuck is the world going on like there are no problems and why are people so numb about vile things happening daily like they won’t affect them in any manner…idk my life is so in the dark rn i have so much of my own problems to deal with but yet being an over-thinker and an overly self aware person is just like piling on more problems on an already big bunch…i wish i could just make myself numb and shut my brain for good over all the dumb fucking stuff going on around me lately…its just too much its like taking a thread of information and making a spool full of it in my own mind taking me no where…the fuck why do i have to be so ultra altruistic and an emblem of what a good person is why do i feel the constant need to be a person which fits in the morally good definition…fuck man i am not any superhero if i was i could have fucking solve my own problems in a blink but i am not then why did God bestow me with such a gift to see everything…that a normal person couldn’t see yet i can’t do anything about it…what the fuck think I am losing it here

Hey y'all!

I'm an 18-year-old high school student about to graduate in 2 months. I had some hefty plans for the coming year and started the new year on a good note. But that didn't last long. So, I'm re-doing my 2025. I've decided my new year starts on 1st Feb-and this time I'm doing it a bit different. Here's how:

The goal: I love travelling. Like no joke, serious travelling. And that's all I've wanted to do for so long. I thought once I finished high school, I would like to take a gap year and travel (frugal backpacking) Southeast Asia for 6 months. Since I've obsessed over this idea for long, I'm pretty certain of my budget and how much I'd need to have to go. And that, ladies and gents is my main goal. I want to leave on 31st July and travel through Thailand, Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, Philippines and Indonesia until about end of January next year.

Anddddd these are my new resolutions!

1. Finances: The main reason why I've chosen SE Asia and not Europe is because of the general cost and viability for a first-time backpacker. I'm hoping I can do it under 6000 US dollars. That includes, hostels every night, maybe even camping etc., local food, cheap buses/scooters and no alcohol/coffee/shopping: basically, anything that costs a lot of money. It's a difficult budget, I'm aware, but not impossible. I'm also not averse to the idea of hitchhiking or world packers. But the bad news here is: I got 0 dollars in my bank account. Yep. Ok, maybe more like around 100. That's my biggest aim. Chase those cheques!
2. Health: I want to improve my eyesight. It's not that bad, but I need glasses. (1.5 in both eyes). My mom improved hers, so I know how...I just need to wake up an hour earlier and actually do it. I'd also like to get back into exercising. I was very big on that, swimming, polo, running, but the winters here are so bad I practically live in my bed. (Brr)
3. School :( Yes, that too. (Screaming) I need to score above 95 per cent in my finals to every suggest this absurd idea of travelling to my parents. Plus, I need the grade if I want to come back next year and give a few competitive exams for the top colleges.
4. Career: Not something you'd expect on this list but here it is. My dream is to become a writer. No scratch that. My goal is to become a writer. I've already written 2 full length novels (above 80k each), one of which was a finalist in an international writing contest. I'm working on my 3rd and 4th right now. I want at least one book deal for one of these. Where I'm from, having a literary agent isn't a requirement so I've submitted it to several publishing houses, just waiting to hear back from them.
5. Personal: Delete social media and stick to it for god's sake. Mediate once in a while.

That's pretty much it, I think. Now here's how I'll do it.

I've realized that my main issue is that I have absolutely no balance in life. I tend to work for 14 hours in one day and crash out for the next week, go down a spiral of stress and worry and think I'm a loser. Well, let's fix that. First, I'm adopting a 1% mindset. No, I'm not a motivational guru but I do like this idea. Repeat after me: we do not have to do everything in one day, growth it gradual.

Next, balance. I plan to divide my day into blocks of 8. Eight hours of sleep, eight of free time and eight of work. During my free time, I'll spend time with my family, my friends, exercise, meditate, try not to have a panic attack.

During my work time, I'll study, write, apply to writing gigs. (I have already to tons of places). I want to score some sort of a freelancing gig during Feb. Just find something. Anything. PLEASE GOD. Then I'll spend the rest- no that's it.

And the last eight hours will be spent joyfully asleep. Not much to say about that.

That's it folks. You may wonder why I'm posting this on reddit out of all places, and to be honest, I just want some accountability in my life. I'll update every month and let's see where we go. And yeah, any advice?

Peace out :)

It's something everyday. I just have bad energy and feelings everyday. I can't believe I'm still alive. How do I manage to survive everyday with my mental conditioning? God gave people something unimaginable when he gave people life.

I am in urgent need of financial assistance to overcome a challenging situation. Due to unforeseen circumstances, I am struggling to manage basic expenses and would deeply appreciate any support. Your help, no matter how small, would make a significant difference in easing my burden and helping me get back on my feet. I am committed to improving my situation and would be incredibly grateful for your kindness during this difficult time. Please consider lending a hand—your generosity would mean the world to me. Thank you for your understanding and support during this critical period.

Thank you for reading my reddit

I’m currently working as a Social Media Manager in South Africa. The agency where I work has seen a continuous increase in workload, but no one is addressing how this will be managed. Our team consists of only three people, and the pressure is overwhelming.

To be honest, I’ve never truly enjoyed working since I started my career. I tend to switch jobs every year, but now it’s becoming harder to find new opportunities, which is frustrating. The workload is heavy, and I feel like I’m not living up to my full potential. I’ve been wanting to start my own business or pursue other ambitions, but nothing ever seems to work out.

What’s even more stressful is the thought of losing my job. If that happens, I’d have to move back home from the city, which feels depressing to even think about. I’m worried because my motivation is gone, and I feel like I’m not performing as I should. It’s not an environment where raising concerns is easy, and I’m not the best at voicing my issues either.

To make matters worse, one of my co-workers is working extremely hard—even on weekends and late hours. I simply can’t keep up with that pace, and it makes me feel inadequate and afraid. Everyone in my life gets annoyed when I complain about work, but this pattern has followed me through every job I’ve had.

I’m worried about what the future holds and don’t know how to break out of this cycle.

Hey guys, getting a little desperate and would appreciate some help. This week I have never been so consistently angry in my life, I have never felt such an intense desire to cause physical violence against my fellow human beings. I'm trying to stay informed (because I believe that knowledge is power) but every news article I read (whether from biased sources or not, I try to read a broad selection) about the actions of the current administration has me wishing the oompa-loompa-in-chief would bugger himself with a rusty rail spike, then do the same to many of his close friends/cabinet picks.

Every news article or social media post that is posting news always has a group of conservatives posting so much bullshit and I want to literally grab them by the throat and shake them until I can make them see sense and understand the idiocy in choosing to elect the walking bag of excrement that now occupies the White House. I want to tie them up and force them to learn about Germany in 1930. How can I disconnect from this hate I feel while staying informed? I hate feeling this way, I am generally a happy person and would rather choose peace over violence but my fucking hell I want to slam some heads against cement at the moment. Please help!

I really need advice on this situation it’s driving me insane!! so, me (20F) have autsim and ADHD plus truamas such as lack of affection and abandonment (heavy daddy issues) I’m currently at university and live with my gay/possiblty bi (can expand if needed) (23M) friend. We have a weird relationship where we do super couply things such as (cuddle, play fight, kiss on cheeks etc) just everything other than sex. for conext He’s been very sweet to me and has been very attentive something I lack with my own family so, experincing this made me really happy. when it came to dating he would either try to find something wrong with the guy or just shut down anything invovling me dating. He’s also made jokes about possiblity marrying me and lavender marriges which I turned down. A few weeks ago I started talking to this guy who does physcology he is very sweet and was currently doing more studies on neurodivergent traits in Women. He was super charming and wanted to get to know me more. we talked for a while on dms and today he mentioned that he wanted to speak to me about something. He mentioned me having a fixation on this friend and that our relationship had surpassed what a regualr platonic relationship was meant to be. He told me that I have centered this guy in my life so much and that my friend (23M) was super possesive over me and was trying to groom me into settling with him. I knew our friendship wasn’t normal for a very long time and I even thought it was a crush at first but I broke down what exactly I was feeling for my friend and it wasn’t anything romantic. it was unhealthy, my friend (23M) would dismiss my feelings a lot and make me feel stupid sometimes and humilmate me infront of other friends. There was one time where we was playing a game and I didn’t know the rules and he proceeded to call me stupid and did it so much I started crying, he then started hugging me and saying he was joking and to get over it and that I was making him look bad. There has been times where I would just finish class and he would ring off my phone asking where I was and when I was getting back home. Another time (for context I journal a lot of my feelings it’s never about people it’s always about how I’m feeling its a way of regualting myself) he locked himself in my room and was trying to find the journal because he was convinced I wrote about him. He was also be very affectionate one minute then the next super dismmisive which made me feel like I did something wrong and made me feel very anxious. The guy i was speaking to assured me that these things where super common in girls like me but I didn’t want to burden him or have him ‘fix me’ it wasn’t fair so I cut things off with him mutaully which he understood. Can you guys help me get over this fixation with my friend?

I am a 17 year old female who dated a man (Let's call him James) 4 years older than me for almost 5 years. At the age of 12 I was on discord when we connected on the spot, not even a week of knowing eachother we started dating on the 23rd of May, 2020. I lied to him about my age, claiming I was 14 years old rather than 12, and he was 16 at that time. When he discovered my real age he was shocked, but accepted it. He told me we needed to keep that confidential, so we hid our age gap from our friends because we knew it was wrong..the first lie.

The first few months were built off a honey-moon phase, and then it got worse. Me being a stupid 12 year-old girl, I was oblivious to many things, especially because it was my first relationship and it was long distance (different countries, 8h difference). When I had male friends some were interested in me, and I wouldn't acknowledge that which hurt him, that's when the gender problems started. He was insecure before but I made it worse, so we set boundaries: no opposite gender friends. I agreed and we continued on. We had a very, very toxic and argumentative relationship. It would go to the lengths of miniature breakups over anything, talking bad about eachother, and even threats of hurting ourselves if one of us did something bad. This is just the summary of our first relationship.

2 years later we broke up because I wanted to self-sabotage myself. He begged, cried, everything for at least two straight weeks, I didn't listen. During the 4-month break up he dated someone for a month. He still had feelings for me and left her because either way, she was hiding stuff behind his back. Right after they broke up, we got back together.

He threatened for us to do better in this relationship because if what happened in the first relationship occurs again, he would leave. I agreed and we were fine for a few months. Again, I messed up due to embarrassment of our long distance relationship. So I hid him for over a year. I practically had another life, new socials, and both gender friends, no cheating was involved. Few months back, James discovered it through my email. If you don't understand that part, he basically had my socials, email, everything except the Instagram and discord I had created (yes, with another email). I confessed to everything and he reacted as anyone would, in shock, anger and devastated. Again we fixed it, took a toll in the relationship but we continue to stay together. After a while he also had both gender friends, which we both eventually got used to these things. James had slowly been getting distant without me realizing, as I was an idiot (still am) and shrugged it off. We were doing alright, he had all my accounts, passwords, you name it, including my photo gallery. I on the other hand did not have anything by choice because I wanted to trust him (not to say it was bad he had mine, he had every right after everything I've done) and he wanted his privacy between all friends, so yeah. The one time I did ask though was to see his female friends (he has access to my messages between guys at any time) but he got upset claiming I'd snoop through everything so there's that I guess.

Anyway, November came, he tattooed our initials, we were doing ok. By the end of Novemeber, James talked about wanting to break up. Me being shocked, was going to talk to him a few hours later once he cooled off but when I did he had already assumed we broke up and said he liked someone else. That someone else was one of his female friends (Let's call her Val). I went crazy on him, like, psychotic crazy. Threatening to hurt myself, begging for him to fix this and he refused. This was on the 25th of November.

From there it was rocky, we'd be friends to intimate, to just strangers. Eventually it got worse because of me, pushing him and begging to try again. Refused again, and his feelings for Val grew more. Although he had gotten rejected once by her since she was asexual, he didn't care and continue to get closer.

Around new years it took a turn for the worst. We had an argument, he wanted to block me, bashed me for everything and laughed at my misery. Regardless I begged once more. He said "alright, I had my fun" and blocked me on Instagram. I couldn't take it anymore and had a manic episode and went to his discord, talking about how I'd tell his university about our relationship. He said not to, that it was bad but I didn't care, I was trying to blackmail him even though I hadn't thought about going through it. He blocked me saying to do it, that I'd be the crazy ex. Not even 5 minutes later I had sent an email to his university and immediately he texted me apologizing. I confessed to what I did, and throughout the week he checked in asking if his uni had replied. When James asked his uni about anything apparently my email never went through, so it was a relief. He continued to be my friend out of fear and disgust.

As of yesterday, he said we can no longer be friends. James and Val had gotten together, and was going to remove me out of respect for her. I didn't fight, I accepted it, and here I am. Sick, with no reason for life. My entire life was dedicated to him which was ironic considering all I've done. This is a mere summary of our relationship, I did not include his problems because this is to bash me, not him.

I do not blame you guys if you bash me, this all happened because of me, not him. I had to confess it to anyone, because I'm tired of holding the truth. Thank you for reading.

If anyone can give me their insight on this I'd really appreciate it, thank you.

Sabe aquela sensação de começar algo super empolgada e depois perceber que não tinha ideia do que realmente precisava? 🫠

Gravei um vídeo falando sobre isso e como lidar com essas 'letrinhas miúdas' das metas. Dá uma olhada e me contem o que acham? 🥰

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqFfz7uUstk

I had betrayed trust, I was completely manipulative, my ego and immaturity contributed to my actions, and I deeply regret the choices I made. I've taken the time to reflect and become aware of everything I did wrong, and I genuinely wish I had handled things in a more mature and considerate way. Now, I feel overwhelmed with guilt, and it's hard to shake off the shame of my actions. I want to move forward, but I'm stuck wondering how to truly overcome this guilt and become a better person. How do I learn from this and make sure I don't repeat these behaviors? I want to rebuild trust, not just with others, but with myself, because I know I'm capable of being better than this.

“I’ll be happy when”

This phrase might just be one of the biggest reasons why we aren’t happy. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of believing that once we hit a goal, finish a project, or make more money, we’ll finally feel happy.

But let’s be real, if happiness came from money or accomplishments alone, why do so many wealthy or successful people still struggle? Depression, anxiety, and burnout don’t just disappear once you’ve “made it.”

Now, try thinking about something you chased after for a long time when you finally got it, did you feel the fulfillment, or did the emptiness inside of you just continued

We spend so much of our lives chasing something, thinking this is the thing we need. We tell ourselves, “If I achieve this, then I’ll be happy.” And yet, when we finally get there, when we achieve it… we often feel nothing. That burst of happiness we expected just isn’t there.

But why? Why can’t we just be happy?

I remember when my younger brother spent two whole years begging my dad for an expensive game. He wanted it so badly, it seemed like his life would be complete if he had it. When Dad finally bought it for him, he played it nonstop for two months. And then? He barely touched it again.

It’s easy to laugh at something like that, but don’t we all do the same thing? We set up these milestones in our minds, thinking, “When I get there, everything will be perfect. I’ll never feel lonely, stressed, or unhappy again.” But life doesn’t work like that.

The truth is, we spend so much of our lives in a kind of waiting room, hoping for the day when everything will finally fall into place when the emails stop piling up, the to-do list is finally made, and we’ve got all our obligations perfectly balanced.

The best time to be happy is right now, not when we get married, not when we make more money, and not when life finally “calms down.” Sure, reaching a goal can bring a rush of joy at first. But over time, Like everything else, we get used to it.

Even in our everyday lives, the same pattern plays out. We tell ourselves, “If I just do this, finish that, and complete this, then I’ll feel satisfied.” But let’s be honest, do we ever really finish everything on our to-do lists? And then, when we don’t, we beat ourselves up for not being productive enough.

What if we changed the rule? What if we made it easier to feel happy? Instead of saying, “I’ll be happy when I do all these things,” let’s change the rule from “and” to “or.”

We can be happy if we go for a 30-minute walk OR finish a project OR eat something healthy OR read a book. It doesn’t have to be everything all at once.

let’s make it easier to be happy because we deserve that.

Currently I am 16, it might be weird that I am having an existential thing at such a young age. However I believe it's a good & a bad thing, I say it's a good thing since I am now awakened and know have the knowledge / compression that there is a limited time on earth and I have to live life with the gifts given to me. However I find it as a bad thing since all I think about is the fear of death and what happens next, I can never get that out of my head. I attempt to spend more time with love ones but feel it's not enough in what I do. I repent spending nearly 5 years doing nothing but spending video games and doom scrolling instead of spending time wisely. I watched ALOT of videos, on managing this and they did help somewhat, but I still have that thought in my head.

It was 2 a.m., and I was just listening to Raanjhana. At the same time, I found myself scrolling through her Instagram highlights for what felt like the thousandth time. I knew exactly which songs she had posted in her stories, and I had memorized the lyrics to all of them. She hadn’t posted any new photos or videos, and yet here I was, unable to stop myself.

I’m writing this down so that I can read it in the future—either to celebrate if things work out or reflect on where I might have gone wrong.

The story begins in my first year of college. Back then, I wasn’t studying too hard, but I was doing well enough. I ended up with a CGPA of 8.66, just shy of the 8.68 cutoff needed to upgrade from ECE to IT. I was the last person who didn’t make the cut, which was a bit disappointing. But on the bright side, I had my five close friends in the same branch, and that made things better.

After first year, when I didn’t get the upgrade, I remember riding the metro with my friends. I was in a great mood, joking around with them. But during the bag-check process, I accidentally left my bag behind. That’s when I saw her for the first time. She was laughing at how someone could forget their bag. Yes, that was her. One of my friends helped me retrieve it, and although I learned her name that day, I’ll just call her “Shhh” here.

I had no idea what to do next, but that was my first interaction with her. Later, when the class lists were announced, I saw that she was in my ECE class. I had to double-check the list because I couldn’t believe it.

However, in the second year, I wasn’t attending classes regularly and didn’t really have the courage to approach her. So, nothing happened between us. By God’s grace, second year passed, and she still didn’t even know my name.

Then came third year, and everything changed. We had a minor project to work on, and one day, her friend approached me to join their group. Of course, I immediately said yes. Hearing her say “Hey” to me for the first time in the group made my heart skip a beat.

The next day, when we met our professor, she shook hands with me, and I swear my heart stopped for a moment. We worked together on the project, but I was too shy to make any real moves. Still, we had small conversations within the group. One day, we even talked offline, just the two of us.

After the project ended, I occasionally messaged her about things like playlists, and she once messaged me for help with a course. But then, something unexpected happened. After our 5th semester, on January 24, 2025, she asked me for help with one of her tests. I explained everything to her, and we ended up talking for more than an hour. That was my moment.

Today is January 27, and we have a lab together. Maybe I’ll get a chance to sit next to her. Let’s see what happens. I’ll write more tomorrow. Bye for now!

Hey dear people on this subreddit,

I don't know what to do anymore and am at my wits end. So I thought that maybe you can help me. If this isn't the right place I'd be happy about suggestions. This is gonna be lengthy.

So I (24 m) am at my wits end. I've been feeling lonely all my life despite trying to do my best as a guy with AuDHD to make friends. Growing up I've never had a bestie or someone who was interested in me romantically, just to use me for their (sexual) entertainment. Yes, I have some friends and I enjoy their company but that doesn't really fill that void a best friend can. A few years ago I cut ties to my family except for my sister bc they were harmful to me and since then I'm trying to work my way through a lot of stuff. (If I try to talk to her about it she wouldn't believe me so I'd have to cut her out of the equation sometimes)

I moved out with my first relationship, she cheated on me a year later but we're on kinda ok terms still. In the meantime I tried to date and find other people to connect online and offline but nothing would ever work even though I try a lot of stuff.

Then I met my ex boyfriend a few months ago online, as a friend at first. That was the first time I had a true best friend and shortly after he told me he was in love with me. Since I fell in love with him I told him the same and we really hit it off. I was more than ready to be in a healthy relationship and to face any hardships that may come. He gave me hope just bc he was the first person to truly love me. After a few weeks he told me that he wouldn't be able to love me the way I loved him, that he hated to be the bearer of bad news and that he wished me all the best and would be happy to be my friend. Since then I am broken. Still dying on the inside, everything feels pointless and I'm trying to not hurt myself. This relationship was everything I ever wanted and I don't know how to cope anymore. I'm going to therapy (bc of other stuff primarily), I'm working out, trying to work on myself and my future but I don't know how to keep on doing stuff. I am not able to do stuff alone anymore, my touch starvation and loneliness are indescribable, I'm trying my best to go out and getting to know new people but I can never build a connection as if I never got the connection 101 that other people just have on top of being neurodivergent. I know that I'm not a bad person and that I might be a good catch, I have a lot to offer and love very deeply but nobody has ever truly wanted me or has been interested in me and it makes me feel like an absolute abomination. I can't go through another rejection despite being through so much bs but my capacity to keep being lonely gets lower every day. I have wanted to be in a gay relationship for the past eight years so please don't tell me that stuff will happen when I least expect it or that I have to be patient or that I just have to work on myself and love myself. I'm tired of working on myself, I've done so much and still am doing a lot. I see people around me that are in a happy relationship and wonder what's the damn secret, I've redownloaded dating apps again but I can't do small talk anymore I'm not able to do this anymore, I'm crying myself to sleep more and more while I'm trying to do better and be a better person bc if it doesn't work for me there must be something wrong with me, right? The thought of being single forever terrifies me and I wish I didn't have this need for deep connection so thst I didn't have to suffer like this. I feel like that character in a sitcom that's always the butt of the joke. Everyone always leaves me and even if it's due to the natural course of things (school, work, death) it just piles up. Nobody wants to stay and fight for me.

If you've read up to this point I don't know what to say except for maybe thank you and that you don't have to comment anything. Thank you

Hey there. 30F married. Childless. Quite literally crying as Im typing as Im embarrassingly ashamed of myself. I always want other people to have crushes on me and to desire me when they show the slightest bit of niceness. Idk if it has anything to do with being ugly growing up and being told that no one would like me. Now that I look better than before, I did get asked out a couple of times not a lot and I still want to get more experiences like this maybe only to feel validated. Like I crossed eyes with this one guy in class who told me that my earrings are cute. I know he is married too and I dont even know him for 10 days but I can’t believe I got so fucking happy that he noticed me and complimented me whilst staying married. And even the fact that he smiled at me whilst crossing eyes also made me happy. Its fucking pathetic of me to want him to like me. This happened last year also around this time with another guy when I kept on stalking and wanting him to just like me and for us to have some connection. Its also mentionable that im extremely lonely and have some friends who reach out to me sometimes only. I just wanna snap out of wanting someone to like me especially whilst being married. It also happened that I got jealous that the guy I recently had a crush on hung out with his female friend. Wtf is wrong with me? I just wanna concentrate on my goals and not want so much validation and be fine with not having a long list of people who likes me. Like I remember the girls in my class when I was a teenager making a list of all the proposals they got and when it was my turn people would actually say that my list would be blank because im me. Now that ive had a mini glow up still that desire is in me to be wanted. I dont wanna feel this childish feeling anymore and just want to live with whatever ive got and go on with my life. To be happy without close friends or constant validation. I also posted my pics on reddit random chats where people called me attractive and atleast 5-6 men messaged me saying that im beautiful and if im single etc. Can’t believe I stooped that low. One time a white guy almost crossed boundaries on the bus with me because I lied and told him im single only to test if he’s actually interested in me. Ofc nothing happened and I told him to stop bothering me when it was getting too creepy.

TL;DR: I constantly want men to desire me whilst staying married and that has caused me to stoop very low such as posting my pics on random reddit chats, lying that im married to guys asking me if im taken( in person ), stalking and hyper fixating on compliments or tiniest niceness from guys.

I bought isopropyl rubbing alcohol because I saw that it helps with nausea, and it’s came today. I sniffed it about 5 times and I don’t know if it’s because I’m panicking but I feel dizzy and weird. I also hoovered up someone of it aswell and I’m also panicking about that since it’s flammable.

Some mornings, it’s hard to get moving. What do you think about to find the energy to face the day, even when it feels challenging?

Share your story—it might just inspire someone else to see mornings differently!

Don’t ever let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do, that’s only that person’s limited beliefs being pushed onto you!! Everything is impossible… Until it’s not!! So go on and do it anyway!!

Don’t ever let anyone tell you you can’t be great!! That person telling you that obviously has no clue what it takes to become great, so they’re afraid of being outshined, or they’re hating cause they could never be who you’re destined to be!! So go on and be great anyway!!

Don’t ever let anyone tell you you can’t make a difference!! They obviously never even made a difference in their own lives and don’t even realize what a difference maker is!! So you go on and make a difference anyway!!

If this hits home and is speaking to you, then you know you’re special, you have that shit they can’t teach!! People are gonna hate!!! Let them!! Let their hate be music to your ears!! Let be the soundtrack to push through the hard times, cause trust me, there will be plenty of those!! Be unique, 1 of 1, often imitated, never duplicated!! What you have inside of you is special, your special!! Let that light shine bright warrior!!

I recently looked at goals I’ve written down over the past few years and almost all of them are the same.

I’ve been able to achieve a couple of them in the last year but seeing the same goals for the past 5!years is so defeating.

I feel like I need help with planning and executing goals.

Advice needed.

So I’m not just burned out, I’m at whatever comes after, and today was such a horrible day filled with more ugly than anyone deserves, and my side of the street is far from clean, but for me especially it really just makes me feel sad for people, and takes the wind outta my sails about who I’m trying to become, why I started on the journey I’m currently on. I’m so greatfull that I’m committed to being the best version of myself, isn’t happening as quickly as I’d like, but I’m far from who started this, and am willing to keep scraping myself back up again and again and again until I get this all the way right, I will never quit because of my “Why”, but how I’ve been going about my business lately is not going to get me rounding third, and I definitely didn’t come this far to get thrown out at the plate either, then it’s all been for nothing, and that can’t happen, I won’t allow it I have way too much blood, sweat, and tears to not come out on top, it’s the only acceptable payment for all the hurt, pain along the way, the price of the pain costed me way more than I ever had to give, so this time I win, or I die trying cause I gave it everything I had… then gave some more!!!

I finally have some clarity of what I have to offer, and that I have a drive to get myself in a position that I was never even supposed to be in yet there I am cause I made it happen. My hunger is second to none, but I still get stuck, kinda lost in this journey and I’m so used to keeping everything within because until my son came along most of my life was surviving, and having to survive on my own, I have survived 100% of what I’ve been through cause my only choice was to survive. I made alot of bad choices during being stuck in survival, but all things that got me right here right now, so I have NO regrets!!

That being said I made a bad choice and got high because I’m currently in a vicious battle with my son’s mother as she knows she can never hurt me anymore, but still can through my son so she’s been trying to keep him from me, there’s all kinds of abuse going on at her house and I tried getting children services involved and even after 2 anonymous tips from 2 different sources (not me) on not just my son but her daughter, they still do absolutely nothing, and talk n treat me like I’m the bad guy!! Then I had a warrant out for me because she filed for child support and gave them all the wrong contact information, so I never even received any notice, but somehow I was at fault and didn’t show up, because like I said, nobody told me!! Then there’s the daily struggle of getting my life on track after suffering serious narcissistic abuse, and some days are just alot harder than others!!

That being said my wonderful co-workers most of known I slipped up, so they decided to kick me while I was already low!! I work at Dunkin Donuts doing whatever I have to do to get my son back, but anytime my back was turned( cowards that they are) they would spray a mist of cleaning spray on my back, or something else cause like I said they’re cowards and did it while my back was turned!! I never in my life wanted to spit in someone’s face, but that day it seemed like a great idea!!! I really need this job as a source of income so I can get my son back so I had to keep walking away to calm myself down as they all giggled cause they’re so funny!!

I know I was wrong, I own that, and all my reasons are honestly just excuses and I know better!! But people today are so ugly and it’s exactly why I started on the path I’m on cause I never wanna be part of something like that, and I definitely don’t try to be part of the crowd, I’m different, I embrace my different!! It still hurts tho when this kinda ugly shows it’s face!!

To be honest, I don’t know if it’s the feeling of emptiness or what. I usually struggle knowing how I feel but for now I think that I’m feeling empty. It’s not like i have no friends, i even have a lovely girlfriend. My life isn’t perfect but it’s also good to me. I think Ive been feeling this every since i moved out from my birthplace but im not sure cuz its been 4 years since i moved out.