I 16M need a real answer that's not the same regurgitated thing. Not just stopping talking to me after me giving an answer you don't wanna hear I want to change I really do but I am honestly too mentally destroyed to improve my routine and my lifestyle.

TLDR for my old posts my mother and I have been mentally abused and manipulated into thinking he could change for as long as I can remember and my dad who was the culprit has never been there for me even though I'm an only child.

I don't want to flood this sub with me saying the same thing over and over and all people have told me is to work on myself or find an adult I trust to talk to about it.

Working on myself just makes it worse and the only adult I trust is my mother and she already knows everything that's happened and no I don't have a school councilor I'm homeschooled.

All of my friends I don't feel comfortable telling any of this to. This will be my final call for help then I'll leave this sub alone because if I don't get anything it's a sign just to endure through it and deal with it.

Please don't try to sell me a course because I'm not interested or try to be my friend because I will assume you as a pedophile because that's the only way to stay safe on the Internet. No hotlines because I'm not even considering suicide and don't want insane on my permanent record. Thank you for your time.

I can’t find closure with ex after being blocked and need help. Worried about my future with new girlfriend because of ex

So I have a huge fear of pregnancy and someone who I used to date I slept with about a year ago, last April/May/June (I think it’s been over 9 months). I always used a condom and she wasn’t on any birth control, but I think I pulled out every time but I’m not 100% sure. And I think one broke one time. Basically I’ve been with someone new for the past 6 months and she’s amazing. She told me she loves me and I can’t say it back because I’m afraid of the past coming back to haunt me. Recently I reached out to the former partner to see how she was and she said “ I’m not sure what you expected reaching out to me but I’m not interested in talking to someone who led me on” which I don’t mean to seem that way, but when we split I just didn’t have that chemistry with her and I felt like she deserved someone who could fulfill that. I feel fulfilled with my current partner and I apologized to my ex for hurting her and that that was never my intentions. Needless to say she blocked me quick. I keep having reoccurring thoughts about what it she got pregnant and my past decisions ruining something that’s going so well for me. I’m constantly craving validation but I can’t find it because she blocked me and I never asked. What do I do?

Hello,

I’m a 28-year-old man and I’m strange .

​

explanation :

since always I have never engaged in a relationship

I’m never really looking to be in a relationship and I think I can’t be in a relationship

because I could never put myself with a person who is not in the same case as me

let’s imagine that would have been the case

if I would have separated from this person I should remain alone for the rest of my life

​

but normally the true monogamy is supposed to be only animal like some bird

and I don’t understand why I’m like that

I did not have an easy childhood, but I do not see what could have been the cause and see no logic in that

and I never find anywhere else this kind of thing for humans , or even on the internet

and it’s deeply hardcoded in me

example if one day I should be the last man on earth with any woman, his would sign the end of humanity

​

I really can’t

but but I feel good and I'm not missing anything

so I’m not feeling crazy , even though it seems like it

with a little luck a person who has skills in psychology could be tell me why or the cause

but one thing is for sure it's incurable

I (F21) have ADHD. I know this plays a role in my motivation but it is seriously derailing my life and I don’t know what to do.

Ever since i’ve been enrolled in school, i’ve always had this lack of motivation for anything. I only ever tried in stuff that I enjoyed but even then, I would sometimes not put any effort in at all. It always happens in a cycle: I’ll start something, work hard at it, then it happens: the breaking point, where all of a sudden I just lose every ability to want or need to work on something. This has been happening my whole life since I started school. It happened in my entire schooling career all the way from pre-primary to university.

I’m really not sure how I managed to make it through all of my schooling but I did.

Now, I’ve moved out of my parent’s place and living on my own since February this year. Paying my own rent and food because my parents pushed me to do so as soon as possible and it was either that or paying rent at home. I thought it would be good for me to move and take a leap because if not now when.

I am so grateful to have a job with a family member being my boss. I do creative work but sometimes not super creative as I work for brands a lot of the time. I don’t mind it but the cycle is hitting me again and I can’t afford to have this happen in a working environment. Im really at a loss and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to start.

I am on chronic medication that aids in my anxiety, an SSRI. It has helped me dramatically and I do not have severe anxiety anymore, it has changed my life.

If there’s any advice anyone can give to me to end this awful cycle of demotivation and utter lack of ability to switch off my procrastination , I would be grateful.

19F here, I’ve had awful luck with romantic relationships, and in a way it makes me not want to have one at all but at the same time I’m constantly wishing that someone would look at me one day and just fully see who I am if that makes sense, like someone who just completely understands me. But once again, I don’t want a relationship at this point in my life, so how do I get better at just being content where I am? And become content in the fact that I don’t have anybody around me that just gets me? It feels lonely, but i don’t see it as worth the possible struggle for love in my current situation in life.

help me please i live in Tn somewhere Help

just feeling kind of emotional bc i feel so bad for any pain anyone is feeling. i wish i could take everyone’s issues away. life is so difficult sometimes. i feel so much for anyone that feels like they are alone within their darkness. i wish that any pain you are going through right now could go away. i wish everyone could just feel happy and fulfilled. i hope that if you are going through something that you know that i care and that someone in your life cares too. and you matter so much. and you are more than your pain. and that your pain is temporary.

release your pain. go right through it. don’t bottle it up. express how you truly need to feel. it is important to feel our sadness and allow us to feel our emotions no matter how strong we want to feel and no matter how invalid our issues may seem to ourselves.

i care about you so much ! and you should care about yourself so much too. sending a wave of love and comfort and strength and happiness to everyone tonight 🫶🫶🫶

Long story short, I (19F) started Effexor (anti-depressant) in January. One of the main side effects of that medication is weight loss/appetite loss. Within 3 weeks I lost 20lbs and it’s drastically getting worse. No one around me except my boyfriend has noticed, although I dismiss him everytime. I noticed that I was loosing weight and I liked it. I started to realize that I actually liked how it felt to starve and be hungry as well. Now it’s been 4 months and I still find myself resisting or just avoiding food all together. I don’t want to eat. It’s not necessarily a weight thing like it was in the beginning, I just do not want to eat at all. I feel like it’s bad for me.

I know nobody can diagnose me, I just wanted someone’s opinion before deciding what to do next. I feel sick. I look sick. I just don’t want to help myself but at the same time I do. Do you think this is an eating disorder? If so, what would you do?

Sorry for lengthy message.

I want to share my story of leaving a cult, leaving an abusive relationship and breaking free from a trauma bond to both!

It took me a while to tell my story. It helped me trememdously hearing other people's stories so l finally mustered the courage to tell mine. I was in a trauma bond and I was not able to leave until I learned about trauma bonding. Here’s my Story:

https://youtu.be/Im4es209-7E?si=8cnFXZNpluIhkCUH

I'm a 22 y/o student, for the past 4 years I'm hardworking, hustling and sacrificing alot, I avoided everything, like going out, parties, enjoyment, friendships, events -literally everything. Now I can see all the people who enjoyed are getting good in life but I'm still in my struggling stage(I know it's bad to compare, but I don't know how to avoid it)

All those friends have crazy party/outing/gaming/relationship/enjoyment story to share, but I have literally nothing to share, all I have is to share about struggling, but no one gives any fuck about it.I don't have their style, vibe, funny attitude, slang, interests to movies/songs/animes, everybody is seeing me as a boaring guy.

I'm a very touchy and sensual person. Touch is how I express love, and how I most directly feel loved by others. I'm asking how to fulfill my needs for touch so that it is almost equivalent (if that's even possible) without a partner because sometimes I end up getting involved with people that I'm not even fully interested in just so I could get this need met. I really want to meet my soulmate, but I'm not rushing it. And I don't feel a need to meet them right away, I have let that go, so I'm happy for my progress on that. But touch specifically... it feels so difficult. Once I get this need met by someone else, I act in ways that would try to keep the other person around so I could get this need met instead of just being myself. And please don't tell me to "love myself" more... I already take good care of myself and I have as decent a support system as I could have right now. But this need for touch... I don't know how to remedy it. I have a weighted blanket, I have a weighted stuffed animal, but satisfying touch from someone else feels priceless. And I feel sad that this need seems to be one need that REQUIRES another person, which I don't want to feel like I need someone else because then I act desperate and lose myself quite easily in relationships. What's your input?

I'm 14 years old and I'm struggling with my stretch marks. Meron ako sa boobs, arms, and legs :<. I also have dark underarms. Gusto ko talagang mag sando pero nahihiya ako bcs of them.

So, I've been with my girlfriend for about four months now, and she's really passionate about salsa and kizomba dancing, which I totally respect. However, there's this one thing that's been bothering me lately: she's planning to go to a dance festival abroad for a whole week, complete with boat parties. Given my past experience with infidelity in a previous relationship, it's stirring up some insecurities for me. She's never been in a serious relationship before, so she's still learning the ropes, and she's generally open to discussing my concerns. But there are times when she crosses boundaries, which triggers my anxiety. I'm torn between wondering if I should just learn to accept her lifestyle or if it's a sign that I should reconsider the relationship altogether. Communication helps, but it's not always easy navigating these situations.

I have a big fear of cockroaches after an unpleasant experience with an infestation (if you also have this fear, don't look up my other threads and posts). The fear was/is so big that I was screaming at night and couldn't remember it. It made me leave my room early in the morning like 5am, just to travel half day long back home, while neglecting my classes at university.

Nevertheless, I had a dream today where I came back to my room, and found some of those roaches on the floor, some dead and some "half-dead".

But for some reason, I felt absolutely nothing. No fear, no disgust. It's more as if I saw them like flies, and just took my shoe and killed them. It was a feeling as if I have "given up" on feeling anxious, and just took it how it is? It's hard to describe. Like "Yeah, just kill it, report it (to the exterminator) and that's it".

Usually, when you dream, you think it's real life, and this was also the case in my dream.

Please help me I want to get out of my pessimistic mindset and move forward in life

when im in a genuine conversation, i always end up stuttering what i say, mumble what i say, and never know what to say.

im real awkward to majority people and have all these negatives.

im still a teenager but i feel if this lingers for too long and i never end up fixing it i will prob end up hating myself when im an adult

what do i do ?

Hello everyone,I wanna ask for your help to let me know about some psychological self help books or some tips which help me to reduce my overthinking .Lately I've been emotionally unstable and not feeling well due to my overthinking and caring about people way too much...so I wanna know how can I change myself to become someone who don't overthink and don't care about people . I really appreciate for giving your valuable time

I always end up procrastinating because I'm afraid I'll fail on doing this important project. I want it to be the best that it is. I am afraid I'll deliver a low-quality project and cause people to doubt my ability. However, by not doing the project, I'm also bound to fail.

HI! I let crippling gender dysphoria, growing up home-schooled and sheltered, ridiculous social (and otherwise) anxiety and more lead me to being a complete shut in for most of my life! I almost had to come to terms with this a couple years ago when my identity issues came to a head, but a person conveniently entered my life who wanted a romantic relationship with me who I then used as a distraction and excuse to not try and fix myself. We were together for years but had a pretty traumatic breakup just a few days ago... Dealing with that is gonna be its own can of worms. Right now I'm more immediately engaged with using this as a wake-up call! I'm 28 years old now and feel like I've grown a lot emotionally and am ready to put in the work to fix myself, as late as that is... But I'm struggling to figure out the logistics of developing a social life out of thin air as a visibly queer/trans person living in the American deep south! I don't know where to look for public places I can feel like I'm being myself and even attempt to make friends who I can show more than just the mask I wear while boymoding to survive at my crummy job. Even if you ignore that, after spending all that time doing things by myself I don't know what I'd even enjoy doing that’s any more social than videogames with internet friends! Does anybody have any advice on how someone could go about any of this, or have any ideas on what constructive things I can do to better myself in these circumstances?

Myself and my partner constantly argue since having our baby a year ago. We'll be okay for a while and then back at it again and it's always about the same things. I feel extremely unheard and unseen in these arguments as he gets so triggered which in turn triggers me and I cant seem to control the emotional outbursts then. I was diagnosed with postnatal depression as well but I'm starting to think it's all circumstances. When he's away at work, my life feels a lot calmer and easier to manage. I never have arguments with my friends and would never have these emotional outbursts with anyone else. I feel like he has checked out of the relationship mentally and is just staying as anytime we have an argument and I end up crying he does not care and just gets angry at me for this. I suspect he has undiagnosed ADHD as he has most if not all of the symptoms. I just don't know what to do anymore but the relationship is really affecting my mental health now and it's making me feel like I overthink everything and that I'm going insane.

The arguments we have are always stupid. They're never even big things but neither of us are able to resolve them without it being heated or if I try to remain calm he'll push and push his point of view and never listen to mine. He still brings up an argument from nearly a year ago and just can't seem to let us move on from any of these as he just wants to ignore them so they're never getting resolved and I just don't know what to do anymore.

Hello all seeking advice/help

I am a 20 year old college student and I think it’s time for me to just give up. In this last month I’ve been trying to become better and create change in my life but have been definitively struggling and unsuccessful. I suffer from negative self talk and a negative/fixed mindset that no one can tell me how to change and that I haven’t been able to change. While I have been given strategies to try to deploy I haven’t and don’t understand how to. I have been unable to produce results, any effort I’ve put in to use these strategies has only worked for so long. I don’t believe I can change because I haven’t and continue in the same cycle of frustration and anger, I think that because I have consistently failed and continue to be unable to change my effort I will never change and need to stop wasting the time effort and energy of those who support me and myself and quit. Find somewhere nice and just give up. No one can tell me how to change my negative mindset and perspective and I can never continuously apply effort and strategies in order to create change so I can’t do it anymore. I’m done struggling, why would I want to continue what about life makes any of this remotely worth it. Without effort failure is guaranteed but I cannot apply effort so much failure is assured. How do I go about communicating this to my family who I can no longer talk to about this because they are tired of hearing about it over and over and over again.

Doing things fast as opposed to a more relaxed manner. Do this too long and you might notice yourself becoming irritable.

You can feel the tension building up in your body.

We can't go fast too much. Some things need to be done in a more relaxed manner. And it's not just the way we do things (fast vs more relaxed) but also stimulants like caffeine and even not eating for long periods can cause this buzz.

I(M24) am going to a party on Saturday. I'm not the biggest drinker but I do like to drink a couple of beers every once in a while. Normally, I'm awkard and corny when it comes to the stuff I say in conversations. I want to try to be more cool and normal but I struggle to do that.

What are some suggestions for me to be less awkard in conversations and more normal and cool ?

Hi everyone!

Repost: Please feel free to delete if not allowed =).

This may not apply to many folks on here, but figured I’d give it a shot anyway. I am looking to recruit participants to complete my online research study to support my dissertation in Clinical Psychology. My research explores the concept of Fear of Depression Recurrence, which captures fears that people who are no longer depressed may have about their depression returning. The goal of this online study is to gain a better understanding of this concept and use that data to validate a new questionnaire designed to measure Fears of Depression Recurrence. We hope that learning more about fear of depression recurrence may present a small window into understanding depression relapse and thus lead to better informed prevention efforts.

Interested? Here is some more information about the study:

Were you ever diagnosed with depression? Do you feel better now?

The Stress and Developmental Psychopathology Laboratory at Concordia University is currently recruiting English-speaking participants for a study investigating the potential fears that people who are no longer depressed may have about their depression returning. This study has received ethical approval and involves completing online questionnaires that assess the fears you may have about your depression returning, as well as the severity, frequency, content, and triggers of these fears. It will also ask you for basic personal information (e.g., name (optional), age, gender, race/ethnicity, occupation) and questions about your current depressive symptoms, other mental health concerns, beliefs about depression, coping strategies, and quality of life.

The online survey will take approximately 1 hour to complete. All components of this study can be completed remotely, in the comfort of your own home. Participants who are eligible and complete our online survey will be entered in a draw to win one of seven $100 CAD Amazon Gift cards.

If you are interested and you:

✔   Are above the age of 18

✔   Have previously been diagnosed with depression

✔   Have no significant symptoms of depression during the last 2 months

Please click on the following link which will bring you to our pre-screening questionnaire to determine your eligibility. If eligible, you will be able to access our consent form and the online survey from this same link.

Survey Link: https://concordiaccrh.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_8v5TiIGO7rSk5kG

I truly don’t know what to do anymore.

I’m really looking for some help getting motivated. I just feel like I’m not moving forward in my life and my depression and anxiety have ramped up to absurd levels.

For clarification, I am a 30 year old graphic designer, I spent a lot of time in school trying to find my path . At the start I was very motivated and I enjoyed creating things. Within the last year it feels like things have slowed down immensely.

I’m back living with my parents trying to save money, but for what I don’t know. I have lost a lot of motivation for the things I used to do and now I’m just feeling constantly depressed knowing that there’s things I could be doing but lacking any motivation towards those ideas. It’s like my mind wants to do these things but is also putting itself down about trying anything.

I feel like I’ve hit a wall and I’m not sure how to get through it. The biggest positive thing is that I’ve managed to get myself to workout again and by doing so I’ve slowly but surely lost 50 lbs over the course of a year.

I really do need help and advice. I just don’t know where to start

I'm a 31 year old male and i have nothing going on in life besides work, eat sleep. How do i figure out what i want in life?

I buy a lot of books but i rarely read it. I buy a lot of udemy courses but i never watch it. How to stop this?

Personally, I've found that starting my day with a quick meditation session, followed by writing down my top priorities for the day really helps me stay on track. It sets the tone for the day and gives me a sense of purpose. How about you guys?