So I got delivered from some demons by one of my friends (I'm a Christian), and I still hear demonic voices. He thinks it's because I have schizoaffective disorder and that illnesses can't be cast out but healed by God in His timing.

I'm in tears because since 2019 when I got diagnosed with this condition, I thought it was demons. I thought for so long it was demons. 😭 And just for my friend to say that it's an illness torn me apart.

On top of that, I was planning a trip to this friends place up in Canada and because I'm not smart enough to hold information or to learn, he said that he doesn't want me in Canada at least for the time being and that he wants his money back for paying for my rent. His girlfriend claims they spent 3,000USD on me and they want it back so I not only quit my job I am now in debt to my so called "friend". And if I don't pay him back, he's going to sue me. His girlfriend is a bitch really but I try to be friendly to her.

This is the worse experience ever! I'm in tears, and I just want my job back or to make better money. But knowing that I have a severe learning disability, I don't think I can go to college to earn extra income.

I might try to take a small class as a correctional officer because they get paid decent but with my condition the company might turn me down so I don't know how to pay my debt off.

I am schizophrenic, on medication and have been diagnosed for about a year, first break 3 years ago. Open to any specific questions about my symptoms ect.

Not sure if this is the right sub, but here goes. I, 25, ftm trans and my boyfriend 28 M have been talking about next steps and getting married down the line. He really wants kids and isn't open to adoption. I got my tubes tied at 21 so he's willing to go through with IVF and a surrogate so I can transition. He knows about my trauma and my schizophrenia and is a perfect partner in every aspect.

I'm terrified. I have such a bad feeling about having kids. I never wanted kids, and it's a man requirement to keep him in my life. I feel unlovable because of my schizophrenia and I'm worried if I leave him I'll also be walking away from the best most supportive person I've ever met. Is it OK for schizophrenics to be parents?

Thanks

Like there's just no point in trying with most things because society wants me to fail, then anything I do that does happen to be useful or beneficial, it just helps someone else I don't see the benefits. Or like I'm a professional scapegoat, or someone nasty people are given permission by the "greater good" to bully when people are bored. Not everyone seems like they feel this way towards me, but the majority do. Like because of what a few scumbags decided one day, now it's okay to lie about me, even if no one believes it. That I'm not allowed to have relationships, because then the lies might not look as true, even though no one fucking believes them. That's what this "illness" feels like, the moment I decide I want to live for myself

I’m begging to have Truman show delusions. I’m currently on a very low dose of Seroquel (25 mg) and my doctors won’t increase it or give me other anti-psychotics because they don’t think it’s necessary. I’m quite frustrated by the situation.

Should I take matters into my own hands?

I was made redundant during the tech redundancies hitting Google, which was great timing (if you can consider it that) as it coincided with my first psychotic episode.

While I've regained some cognitive function, the disorganised thoughts/behaviour, mind-blanking, struggles with logic/maths, and most cripplingly the avolition, have made me realise that I'll likely never have the job or career I always envisioned.

This sucks, but I'm trying to think realistically, and I'm curious to know what your experience is.

What job(s) do you have (if any)? Have you retrained in something new? Have you changed jobs to be more suited to post-diagnosis life?

It’s confusing me. I was first diagnosed bipolar and the meds did not work. At all. I grew to hate them. Thought they were pseudo science in the end. Then I got a new doc who said I was schizoaffective. Gave me antipsychotics. And the meds are actually mostly working? My decade long paranoia is reduced? I still have issues, but this is mental. Meds actually working. Never thought I’d see the day.

450k insurance policy living on disability 1300/m. I’m gonna wait for the suicide clause to be over and pass that money on to my family. I’m almost done year one of two for the clause.

My brother was recently diagnosed with schizophrenia. He was on anti-depressants and adderall which caused a phycotic break. He was admitted to a mental hospital for 3 days, but they released him.

He’s currently living with my Mom, but since he’s been back he goes on spontaneous drives for hours or overnight without telling anyone where he is. He was found trying to enter someone’s home and the police called us. He also leaves his medication. He’s being extremely mean to my mom, this isn’t sustainable we are all starting to lose it.

We are at an absolute loss on what to do. Because he’s 29, we can’t force him to go to a home. He’s spending tons of money , my mom tried to takes his keys away but we are worried he will hurt her. We reported him missing and the police found him 3 hours away.

Has anyone dealt with this? How can you help someone to get better?

It happened very recently and even though I haven’t met him, it’s kind of affecting me a lot. When my family was struggling with money, I used to live with my grandma and along with her, there was her brother who lived with her and was incredibly ill.

When he had reached his early 20s, he had developed schizophrenia. Our family has been having him kept in his room all day ever since and he’d always be there talking to himself. His room would just be across mine and everytime I go out or downstairs, I could always hear him talking to himself and etc. Although he was the way he was, I was always intrigued about his background and even though he was a very hostile person, I felt bad for how inevitable his circumstances was according to how he changed and the way everything went for him.

Even though I didn’t know or see him that much, whenever I went out of my room, his door would just be across. I would often heard him on the other end either being angry and schizophrenic as a kid and although it’s been awhile since I heard him, it’s affecting me now that he’s dead and it’s kind of making me worried if I’ll ever end up like him in the future. There’s some evidence that it was triggered by an traumatic event, but from what I know schizophrenia can be inherited and I’ve always dealt with anxiety and isolation which makes me worried if im prone to schizophrenia. It’s been giving me incredible anxiety and honestly sadness with the way his life ended stale.

I dislike how paranoid I am now a days. I dislike that even though good things happened, a lot of them came at a price. I dislike how some didn't even believe because I masked so well. I disliked how much good things happen and I get scared for my life. I dislike how unstable I am. I dislike how much life takes me to places that I don't do well in. I dislike how I don't think like others. But in that part I am glad, most of you suck. I just want to be alone for the most part. That way I can hurt no one, and no one can hurt me.

I feel suddenly lucid and I need help on what to do. Am I to take my haloperidol? It makes me overly tired and prone to seizures. Ever since I had the first one I've felt like God was communicating with me in some unknown way, like I was part of God, like an organ, that He can directly induce and control. I feel chosen for some unknown mission but I don't know exactly what it is. I feel blinded by light. Part of me went blind, part of me sees clearly, ever since the first one. I have stared at Him, and I am the only one who can do it without dying. But even still I feel like I am collapsing and melting down, like my earthly order can't survive this communion without changing completely to endure the perfect and complete state of peace and utter intimate harmony in God. I don't believe He exists, I know it. I feel like God does everything for me, so I should do everything for Him too. I feel mutilated, and I do want to be this way. Although I am the Tabernacle, I am a terrible sinner, and I am called to abandon this world, not by death but by enduring it to the end. I feel like I can finally visualise and remember and feel and taste and smell God, so personal is our relationship. I can almost touch Him. I am so very sorry if this is nonsensical rambling, my judgement isn't very good.

A little while back, I was waiting at a red light on my bike. Someone behind me accidentally bumped my bike, which can happen in traffic. In the heat of the moment, I yelled at them. They got angry and things almost escalated, but luckily someone intervened. It happened close to home, and I haven't seen them since. While I'm not scared of that specific person, I've been getting stuck on negative thoughts. My mind keeps picturing anyone who looks a certain way as being that same person. It feels delusional, like I wouldn't be able to stand up for myself even if someone else was in the wrong. I know it's not rational, but these thoughts keep popping up and it's hard to shake them.

Does it ever go away? The religious thoughts, the thoughts of self-harm?

i had an hallucination in third person, i was in distress. i saw myself, a mini version of myself in a white room with a wrecking ball & i swung it & i hit the wall & it made a huge impact which caused a crash/boom sound i think & it made me lose balance. has anyone had anything similiar???

My brother has schizophrenia, he'll come in and out of the fog every other year. This is the year we're seeing THAT side and once again it's been awful so far.

Last year he stared at walls and talked to himself, spit and would throw up everywhere, hear voices and say incredibly offensive/nasty things. He would call the cops on himself for things like "there's a bomb in my room", "I think someone's spying on me", "I think my parents are dying", and more of that sort. He has even tried to cut his own penis off and threw himself off the flower bed onto the concrete outside. The most intense for me is when he's put his hands on both our grandparents, he would spit and slap and knock down and hit them. The cops do absolutely nothing, they'll come and talk to him basically let him "calm down", he'll start going on about fake news or something about the government and repeatedly asking or saying the same nonsense until the cops just walk off like ok dude see ya.

This year it's looking like we're heading into the same direction, it hasn't gotten that bad but I don't wanna wait for it too, my grandparents have no idea what to do as always and they're even older now and can't defend or think right themselves. Yesterday my brother slapped my grandma and then he came out and tried hitting my grandpa with his cane, not letting him come inside the house and my grandpa can't walk like he use to for this to be going on is making everything even harder for him, its incredibly sad.

I just don't know what to do, if he's allowed to just do all this stuff then there's no help. I thought you could get arrested for elderly abuse, or taken away to the mental hospital atleast if you're this dangerous.

I have been taking clozapine for 11 years and I’ve always hated it. Granted it took the psychosis away and the frequent stays in the hospital but I don’t like how it makes me feel. It doesn’t help negative symptoms at all for me, it makes me feel so sedated and lethargic. I’m not exaggerating when I say I’ve slept half of those 11 years away. I stopped taking it over a month ago without telling anyone and I feel so good off of it. I sleep now at the most 3 hours at night if at all and feel so energized. Thing is I told my psychiatrist yesterday and he was not happy. He says I’m psychotic but I don’t see it. I don’t have schizophrenia anymore so I don’t need meds. He even told on me to my mom, now she’s all worried. They want me to get back on it but I don’t want to. I finally feel like I’m living and not just existing. I’m an adult and can make my own decisions. How do I get them to back off?

Keep thinking I'm hearing my neighbors, mainly the ones above us, talk about me and the apartment in general. I hear them through the day at different levels, sometimes screaming, mostly talking normal. I hear them threatening to call management on us because our place is messy and we are loud and up at night sense we work night shift. I hear them at random times through the day and night talking about us. My partners say they can't hear them but I truly think I have better hearing and heightened senses over either of them. They haven't talked to us once and in fact we haven't seen them besides once or twice really on after we moved in. How can I talk if they're real? I didn't believe my partners when they say they don't hear talking. I just think they don't have good enough hearing.

He said even the first time he met me, it baffled him because the voices calmed down and he was actually able to concentrate fully on what I was saying etc. And it was really bizarre for him.

He really turns out he has a crush on me so I said it would be best that I distance myself until his feelings pass and then we can go back to being friends, as I don't wanna string him along and like I wanna respect him etc.

But he had a breakdown yesterday so I went to visit him to help as his mental health is more important than getting over a crush. Anyway he told me this (that the voices stop when he sees me) then and I'm trynna figure out why this happens and if this a thing that other schzaphreniacs have experienced.

Part of me is worried that maybe he's lying and he's just saying that as like a weird compliment or maybe like to make me think I'm like the cure or something. I have no idea. I havnt known him too long, he genuinely seems like someone who wouldn't lie and is a wonderful person. It's just I have trust issues so I am always cautious when people say stuff too me. He hasn't just said this completely out the blue he mentioned it before, but I didn't understand or know the true depths of his schzaphrenia till recently.

But yeah I don't think he's lying as it's not in his character. But it's quiet bizarre cus he's never had this before with anyone else. So I just don't know I'm trynna figure out why like for some reason they stop around me. And if this is known thing or an experience any other schzaphreniacs have had, and if so does it take a dark turn or something?

I'm not asking you to diagnose me or to tell me I have it or don't, I just need to know what I do

"Determining the Role of Social Reward Learning in Social Anhedonia in First-Episode Psychosis Using Motivational Interviewing as a Probe in a Perturbation-Based Neuroimaging Approach"

Principal Investigator: Junghee Lee, Ph.D.

What is this study about?

The primary purpose of this study is to explore a better way of measuring social anhedonia, the inability to feel pleasure related to social interaction, with tasks designed to measure how individuals respond to social rewards and to examine whether brief sessions of psychosocial training can change performance on those tasks.

Who can participate?

We are looking for those with first episode psychosis. You may be eligible for the study if you are between 18-35 years old, have no neurological problems, and have no history of problematic drug or alcohol use in the past 6 months. Participation in this research is voluntary.

Due to the study requiring in-person visits, you should be located near Birmingham, Alabama.

What will happen in the study?

Interview (up to 2 hours): Answer questions about your mental health and medical history and substance use history, etc.

Assessments (about 2 hours): Respond to objects that are presented on a computer screen, answer questions about your personality, and take tests that measure your mental abilities.

Skills Training (three 45-minute sessions): Discuss various obstacles with a member of the research team, as well as how to improve upon them.

MRI Scans (about 1.5 hours): Lie down still and perform a social information processing task in the MRI scanner before and after skills training sessions.

Total study participation may take place over multiple sessions.

Do participants receive compensation?

Participants will receive $25 for each hour participated. Total compensation could be up to $363.

For more information, please call the lab at 205-934-8203 or email us at NLSB.UAB@gmail.com and please feel free to review our lab website https://www.nlofsb.org/

Apparently this is a common delusion, but can’t it actually happen?

It’s only been there for 2 days, and I’m scared to touch it.

Hi all. My mother has schizophrenia. She has had it since my elementary school to current college years. Since her first episode, I think the longest without an episode has been 3 years. The episode lasts like couple months to several years. I think average is 1-2 years. How about others?

I’ve had a hard week, which ultimately resulted in me realising I’m not well enough to have a second child. Both physically, and mentally.

Physically, because I gained 30kg on Olanzapine. But also mentally, with paranoia lingering very quietly in the background.

While I’m currently stable - I have a job, a partner, a pre-schooler - I’ve realised having another child may be too much for me. And for my family.

I’ve been crying a lot. Schizophrenia sucks. I feel I have it harder than my peers. Episodes are so debilitating. And I’m beginning to realise I won’t have the 2-3 kids around the dining table I always wanted.

I’m grateful for what I do have, don’t get me wrong. I know others have it much worse. But I also mourn the life I could have had without schizophrenia.

I feel like schizophrenia has had a real toll on my physical health, and now my ability to safely have a second child.

I guess I’m posting to hear from people in my position, who may wish for things that feel impossible with schizophrenia. I am truly grateful for this community.

Hi, I am not supported by my doctor or family regarding my decision to come off of medication.

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I am from the UK, diagnosed with psychosis for 5 years on medication and recently on depot injections to my arm but I cant take it my body and mind is telling me I need to find a way to stop this before i die. I have too many side effects; I have low mood, tiredness throughout the day, traumatising nightmares daily, weakness. I have another tribunal coming up soon, do you have any advice to be accepted so I come off of CTO?

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Thanks.

I heard multiple and with the same voices called my name and this happened while i wear a headphone even when i put down my headphone i still hear it. I tried everything, try to talk myself out of it, drinking water, singing, screaming, punch myself, but it only stop the moment i tried to ask my sister for help. I knock on her door, she open it and then the voices immediately stop

Before it happened i dont really feel anything, no anxiety, no nothing. Just playing a game, out of nowhere i heard voices and it scares ts out of me. This happened to me a long time ago but a month ago, i heard a kid laughing like right beside me. I dont know if its hallucinations or just scary stuff. So just wanna your opinions on this stuff

Hello all, I wanted to share my story anonymously. I has been diagnosed with schizophrenia at age of 17. I got 90% in my 10th grade so I was preparing for 12th grade for getting similar grades. My coaching institution was taking frequent tests almost daily to gauge our understanding of subjects. After topping for first 6 months, my grades started getting exponential decrease. I got fear that I will get very low grades in 12 th and might not secure a good senior college for engineering. I come from a middle class family in India who saw his father sell his only home for his mother's and wife's surgeries. I did not want my father to suffer again financially for my education.

This created a cycle of pressure and depression. Soon I started hearing voices of some of bullies when they were not around. The voices were telling me that I am a failure and will not able to achieve anything in life. Those voices became frequent with time. Those voices told me that it is quiet normal to get this powers at this age and you are not a special person rather you are a failure and disgrace to your family. I was able to hear voices 24 hrs a day till my 12 th grade exams arrived.

At the time of first paper the voices were going around my head messing my ability to write. It was the first time the voices told me to commit suicide. I came home, I saw my god's photo on the wall and cried. I told everything to my mother and she was shocked. My parents started my psychiatric treatment next day. I started to feel better as those Medicines kept me slept for 12 hrs a day but voices became less frequent. I gave my 12 th grade exam and engineering entrance JEE at that time. I was able to secure admission in an tier 2 engineering college. After 3rd year at engineering college those voices were completely gone. I got job through campus placements and currently working as a data scientist in an Indian MNC.

When I come across cases of schizophrenia on internet I find a lot of them struggle to cope up with it. The point of the post was I am now able to lead a normal life and I feel with right medication and counseling most of us can.

Today, together, we rock and roll!

Attached below is todays video link to my “On Conquering Schizophrenia” YouTube channel. Today entails a new edition of “Life Lessons Learned with Age”. Like all, todays video is ever brief and can be viewed amid a day wiser.

https://youtu.be/nWhnV4y9QIM?si=K_b9I5jS2d0MUv-r

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