/r/RewritingThePrequels
Rewriting the Star Wars prequel movies
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/r/RewritingThePrequels
I’m working on a rewrite of the prequels on Wattpad, and I’m thinking of including a younger Boba Fett in my rewrite of Revenge of the Sith.
But the thing is that I want to change Fett’s origin quite a bit. I still want him to be a clone from Kamino, mainly so I can still have Temuera Morrison playing and voicing the clones in the sequels, since Morrison’s clone voice is very similar sounding to Boba’s voice in the OT.
I’m thinking Boba is still a clone who doesn’t have accelerated aging, but in my version he’s not the only one. He’s among one of the hundreds, or even thousands of clones that were created among one of the first clone batches that the Kaminoans created for the Republic, but at this point in time the Kaminoans hadn’t figured out how to create clones with accelerated aging yet, so they went to work on a new batch of clones that they were hoping they could create with accelerated aging, and those clones were created about two years later. Boba and his fellow prototype clones were still trained to be clone troopers and serve both the Republic and Jedi Order, but they’re training took twice as long as it did for the clones who had accelerated aging.
You’re also probably wondering who the clone template is in my version. Well it’s not Jango Fett, in fact Jango doesn’t exist in my version of the prequels. I’m still not sure who the clone template is, they still would look and sound like Temuera Morrison obviously, but I’m still not sure what the backstory with that character is.
In my version of episode 3, Boba would appear as sort of a special class of Clone Trooper. He’d have a very similar design to the original Boba Fett concept arts made by Ralph McQuarrie that depicted him as sort of a “super trooper” for the Empire. In my version, and this would all be explained deeper in the Clone Wars show, is that maybe Palpatine made a secret deal with Death Watch behind the Jedi Order’s back, to have select clone troopers who were some of the best of the best in the Republic be trained in Mandalorian combat and other Mandalorian techniques, and even given special equipment that was very similar to Mandalorian equipment. Boba may have had slower training compared to the majority of the clone army, but he still rose through the ranks and was selected by Palpatine to be given Mandalorian equipment and training, then he would become part of one of the Republic’s most special and elite forces that’s also top secret. So secret that the Jedi don’t find out about Palpatine’s Mandalorian clone troopers until episode 3 when they meet Boba Fett, and this is one of the many things that causes the Jedi to become more suspicious of Palpatine.
After the Republic becomes the Empire, Palpatine declares that the clone facilities on Kamino will be shut down and the clone army will eventually be replaced with recruits from all across the galaxy, and this would be how we got stormtroopers. Now that the Clone Wars are over and the Republic is gone, Boba decides he doesn’t want to stop fighting, so he modifies and repaints his Mandalorian clone armor and equipment, then he becomes a bounty hunter. Due to his loyalty and exemplary service to Palpatine, he’s allowed to go free and be a bounty hunter, but Palpatine and Vader know he can be very useful, so they still hire him a lot for bounty jobs, as we’ve seen in Empire Strikes Back.
What do you all think of this? Also how would you handle Boba Fett in the prequels? Or would you not have him be in the prequels at all?
In your version of the prequels era, what specific role do the Jedi play in guarding peace and justice in the galaxy? Under what circumstances would a planetary/sector government consider requesting assistance from the Jedi as opposed to resolving the matter through their own local police force/planetary defense force?
Just something that came to my mind in the last 24 hours.
I wonder if there's too much conspiracism in the Prequels?
George Lucas said this famous quote, "Democracies aren't overthrown; they're given away" and developed the Prequels based on that idea.
"All democracies turn into dictatorships—but not by coup. The people give their democracy to a dictator, whether it's Julius Caesar or Napoleon or Adolf Hitler. Ultimately, the general population goes along with the idea ... What kinds of things push people and institutions into this direction?"
In Clones, Lucas goes a way toward answering that question. "That's the issue that I've been exploring: How did the Republic turn into the Empire? That's paralleled with: How did Anakin turn into Darth Vader? How does a good person go bad, and how does a democracy become a dictatorship? It isn't that the Empire conquered the Republic, it's that the Empire is the Republic." Lucas' comments clarify the connection between the Anakin trilogy and the Luke trilogy: that the Empire was created out of the corruption of the Republic, and that somebody had to fight it. "One day Princess Leia and her friends woke up and said, 'This isn't the Republic anymore, it's the Empire. We are the bad guys. Well, we don't agree with this. This democracy is a sham, it's all wrong.'"
However, deep down, I don't think even Lucas believed a democracy could be murdered in broad daylight. The ways Palpatine's rise to power was written, rather than the cult of personality and populism, they are very much based on conspiracism--Palpatine engineering both sides of the war, creating the secret clone and droid armies, enacting a secret protocol to massacre the Jedi at once, and launching a coup... And that took the intergalactic war for Palpatine. Lucas didn't envision all it could take was moderate inflation and the media machine inflaming the politics for a democracy to backslide.
Thinking back, instead of focusing on that popular mandate and spontaneous aspect of Palpatine's rise, maybe I mistakenly focused on conspiracism more than the movies.
For example, in The Phantom Menace, Palpatine defeats Valorum and gets voted into Chancellorship during the Naboo crisis, whereas in my rewrite, he's the Vice Chancellor who succeeded Valorum's role after his death. The former adds spontaneity and a populist angle to his Chancellorship rather than the backhanded dealing that was in REDONE.
In another example, in Revenge of the Sith, Palpatine declares the transition to the Empire, and the Senators and the people voluntarily go along with it. In my REDONE, I changed it so that Palpatine does a public purge of the dissidents in the Senate, inspired by Saddam Hussein's Ba'ath Party Purge. It's essentially a coup, and that strikes as Palpatine threatening people to become the Emperor, rather than people making him the Emperor. (There is also a criticism as to how Bail Organa and Mon Mothma were not purged even though their conversation to remove Palpatine was wiretapped)
Agree? Disagree? Should I remove the Senate purge scene from Revenge of the Sith? Is there a way to make Palpatine's rise more spontaneous?
Mind you, I've only seen the prequels and the 2003 "Clone Wars" so I could be wrong, But why couldn't the writers have Boba Fett be taken in by Anakin and/or Padme after Jango's death?
Yes, Boba isn't a jedi but think about it; Anakin had just lost Schmi so he (or Obi-Wan for that matter) would've related to the kid and take him in under his wing. Albiet more in combat and piloting rather than the ways of the Jedi. Especially if encouraged by Padme.
Speaking of which, Padme could've taken in Boba to raise as her own. It wouldn't have been out of character; after Anakin and the Sand People, Padme wouldn't want another incident like that to happen. With Boba already having similarities to Ani, it'd be logical for Padme to try to help. Besides, Adopting Boba could've helped prepared her (and maybe Ani if in on it) for parenthood. We haven't seen Ani interract with any kids (save Ahsoka). Not even with Padme's own nieces. Later seeing Boba interact with either Ryoo or Pooja would've been interesting too.
Then, after Padme's death, Ani would grow to see Boba either as a surrogate son or (to avoid anymore painful attachments) would've seen the kid as another hitman.
Jar Jar Binks is such a blight in the Star Wars franchise that I have not seen anyone even suggesting "fixing" this character. Most of The Phantom Menace fixes, including mine, just cut the character entirely or entirely change the character into something else, such as Darth Jar Jar and the fanedits that cut the slapsticks and redub his character into a serious role.
However, could Jar Jar Binks have worked? I mean Jar Jar as this idiot comic relief concept who blunders his way from the Gungan outcast to the Gungan General accidentally. Was there a hidden potential that was executed badly? Could this concept salvaged?
Although Lucas cited Goofy as an inspiration for Jar Jar Binks, you can draw a clearer line from the silent movie slapsticks like the works of Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, and Harold Lloyd. Some set-pieces outright rip off the scenes from these films. Lucas has always said that he envisioned Star Wars as a silent movie, so the cinematic influences from the silent movie icons make sense.
Although the link no longer exists, the old article on StarWars.com confirmed the influence: THE CINEMA BEHIND STAR WARS: THE KID
"Ahmed Best’s motion-capture performance of Jar Jar perfectly captured the exaggerated physicality of Charlie Chaplin and other silent film stars. Where the droids in the classic trilogy brought us Abbot and Costello or Laurel and Hardy-style humor, Jar Jar brings us the stylings of the great humorists from a generation prior.
Taking Lucas’ inspiration for Jar Jar’s character one step further, Charlie Chaplin claimed that the walking style of his Little Tramp character was based on an old drunk he knew in London named “Rummy” Binks. Coincidence? I doubt it."
In these movies, the hero is often a clueless downtrodden wanderer but childlike and kind-hearted, who tries to do good in tragic or hostile situations. He always gets into trouble and is chased, but instead of using his strength, he uses clumsiness to achieve success. He is a victim of bad luck, but also a lucky winner, who solves the obstacles through coincidences. He is hated by the straight-faced characters but wins over them.
Jar Jar perfectly fits this description. He is a buffoonery Gungan outcast who bumps into the great historical significance, goes along the amazing adventures, guides the Jedi and Naboo to the Gungan cities, and eventually bumbles his way to the battle as a general, who fights off the threatening droid army through unintentional accidents. Innocent and ignorant, yet resourceful and devious. So if Jar Jar hits all these tropes and beats, why is he not funny, while Chaplin, Keaton, and Lloyd are?
The first big difference is, what made these silent movie icons work is that they are silent movies. The characters didn't talk. They didn't screech or blurt out the juvenile lines in the Jamaican accent. For most of the time, their facial expressions were straightforward and deadpan. The character was expressed through body language, not through annoying gags. The comedy comes from the exaggerated physicality and absurd situations. Jar Jar's loud screaming and shouting in every single scene he's in undermines the focus of his physical humor. The audience is distracted by his obnoxious lines rather than the purity of the physicality.
This matters because although characters like the Tramp and the Great Stone Face are funny characters, they don't view themselves as funny. It's literally in the name: The Great Stone Face. The characters take themselves seriously. The comedy comes from his straight-faced, earnest attitude clashing with the unintentional results. They simply do things because they believe in them. That is why the Tramp can have dramatic, emotional moments. Drama and comedy work together because the character is sincere. You can't imagine the emotional moments from Jar Jar because he is always a shithead, who tries hard to be funny, rather than naturally funny.
It also doesn't help that Jar Jar relies too heavily on random accidents. Yes, Chaplin and Keaton's characters were lucky, but they found their way through a hostile world with the help of creative thought and resilience--outsmarting the antagonists.
Another thing with the silent classics is that the shots were held longer, on a wider angle, encapsulating the visual comedy through cinematic language. Everything is captured in the same frame. The directors find clever angles that heighten the dramatic irony of each moment, creating a beautiful rhythm and timing. The audience could understand the situation just by watching one shot. The Phantom Menace didn't understand this and just cut the scenes into small bits and chunks. Watch Jar Jar's slapstick in the battle. Tanks are moving cut Jar Jar is running cut Jar Jar hides cut the rider whips the animal cut the carriage moves cut Jar Jar climbs the carriage cut the load unleashes cut... You can see every single action and reaction is separate. You can make a good visual comedy with fast editing if you do something like Edgar Wright, but the Jar Jar scenes in The Phantom Menace are filmed and edited in the style of an average action scene--flat and slow. There are no creative cuts, timing, or rhythm.
The score also doesn't support the tone of the scene. Again, the music is composed like the average epic action music. This subconsciously makes the audience take the moment as a serious battle scene, which is why the scene is so jarring. Compare this to the scene from Chaplin's Shoulder Arms, which is basically the same concept as The Phantom Menace's comedic battle. The score is lighter and fits the lighter tone. Obviously, that's the silent movie, so the one-to-one comparison might be ill-advised. How about the the scene from The Great Dictator--a talkie--in which Chaplin omits music entirely. Also, notice that Chaplin doesn't scream like a maniac.
This is not the fault of John Williams. Watch the swordsman scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark, and you can listen to the music synched with the changing mood of the scene. Indy faces the swordsman--the music goes dark. Indy pulls the gun and shoots him--the music goes funny. The composer is only as good as the director's instruction, and Lucas is not exactly the best director.
Just by comparing and contrasting with the silent classics, you could see where Jar Jar Binks went wrong. The character could legitimately be a funny addition if he just emulated Chaplin and Keaton's principles:
I haven't thought deeply about this moment in the Mace Windu versus Palpatine scene until now, and it is difficult to change a scene that has become iconic in its own right.
Palpatine shouts, "No, no, YOU WILL DIE!" and blasts the Force-lightning at Mace Windu, who deflects it right back to Palpatine, which morphs his face. Palpatine murmurs, "I'm weak", which paints himself as a victim to the Jedi. That somehow works and Anakin cuts Windu's hand. Palpatine then unleashes another Force-lightning and screams "UNLIMITED POWER", killing Mace Windu.
It's the moment almost everyone loves. It's deliciously evil. It's become a meme, which is why it has not been examined critically all that much.
But if you take in the context of this overarching scene, what purpose it serves, and the motives for each character... Palpatine unleashing the lightning and acting like a melodramatic narcist here negates Anakin's transformation so much.
First of all, who yells "YOU WILL DIE! POWER, UNLIMITED POWERS" and shoots the lightning when they are trying to pretend they are a victim? Remember, Anakin snitched Palpatine to Windu that he is this great devil they have been looking for. Anakin knows and already expects that Windu went here to uphold a lawful arrest of Palpatine. So Palpatine trying to convince Anakin that the Jedi are trying to overthrow the Republic all along, as he told him before, should not work at all.
When Anakin burst into the room, all he saw was Palpatine literally shooting the Force lightning at Mace Windu--the guy he's trying to paint as a bad guy. Palpatine here looks so obviously evil, and Anakin acts like it's not obvious that the guy shooting the lightning is the bad guy, contemplating "Oh, man, this is a morally grey situation! I can't decide who's evil or not!"
You can say maybe the lightning is there to add to the notion that Palpatine is really a powerful Sith enough to "create life". That would have been fine had Lucas not framed this scene into Palpatine pretending to be the real victim with "I am weak". There's a image on r/PrequelMemes where Anakin responds to that line with, "He's weak? I guess Sith are weak. I won't become one." It's just a meme, but it's also a true criticism of this scene. So which is it? Is Palpatine weak and a victim, so the Jedi are the bad guys? Or is it that Palpatine is so strong that only he can save Padme? Maybe you can be generous that Lucas deliberately aimed for the fascist rhetoric of "enemies are both strong and weak", but it's a stretch. The chances are that it is just bad writing on Lucas' part.
I'm thinking about changing this scene in the next revision to REDONE. Anakin's motivation to turn in REDONE is already far clearer, so that's already taken care of. I don't want to completely remove the lightning.
My plan is to have Palpatine cornered before the point of Mace Windu's lightsaber. Anakin arrives at the room, which, at the moment, looks like Windu is threatening Palpatine with the saberpoint. So Anakin doesn't witness Papatine shooting the lightning and attacking Windu.
When Windu raises the blade to strike Palpatine, instead of only cutting his hand, Anakin stabs Windu in the chest, fully committing to his choice to betray the Jedi rather than out of impulse. Instead of Palpatine using unlimited power, Anakin is the one who kills Windu and pushes him out of the window, like the Revenge of the Sith video game.
So, for now, Palpatine's face is not wounded. He does not look like the utterly evil-looking Darth Sidious just yet. Instead of acting and behaving like a stereotypical Sith Lord, he should be friendly, as he always was to Anakin, patting his back and consoling him about killing Mace Windu. He asks Anakin, "Become my apprentice. Learn to use the dark side of the Force", not in a super sinister manner, but like a father figure.
This also logically makes sense for the issuing of Order 66. Because the ways it works in the movie, how do the clones even recognize Chancellor Palpatine when he orders Order 66? He looks totally disfigured, is wearing the Sith robe, and even his voice does not resemble Chancellor Palpatine.
Later, when Yoda confronts Palpatine, that's when you can have Palpatine go full Sidious where he shoots the lightning. This is where you can carry over the "POWER, UNLIMITED POWER" line to the Yoda fight, to heighten Palpatine at the peak. When Palpatine shoots the lightning, Yoda deflects it back to Palpatine, and that's when Palpatine's face gets distorted.
In your prequels, what is the political set up?
Is the Republic divided by a separatist faction, megacorps, a proto empire or maybe something entirely different?
In my version, Anakin is a 15-year-old farmboy and Obi-Wan is a 24-year-old Jedi Knight when we first meet them. Obi-Wan was Yoda's padawan instead of Qui-Gon, although he and Qui-Gon still work together a lot in my version of Phantom Menace. As for Anakin, his name is originally Anakin Lars and Owen Lars is his biological brother who also happens to be around Obi-Wan's age. But as part of Anakin's initiation into the Jedi Order at the end of Phantom Menace, he has to change his last name in order to keep his family safe; the initiation is sort of Anakin's "rebirth" in a way. His last name is Skywalker because that's the nickname his brother Owen used to call him when they were growing up on Tatooine, since Anakin flies around a lot in a T-16 skyhopper through the skies of Tatooine. Like Obi-Wan said to Luke: "When I first knew him, your father was already a great pilot."
Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are assigned on a mission together to investiage the rumors of there being a secret invasion on the planet of Alderaan, and those rumors turn out to be true. They rescue the 15-year-old senator of Alderaan, Padme Amidala, who also happens to be one of the only human rebel fighters on Alderaan who's willing to stand up to the Separatists from her invaded planet, most of the other fighters are the gungan people of Alderaan who live underwater and don't get along that well with the human people of Alderaan. They escape the planet in Padme's personal ship, but the ship gets damaged while they're escaping, so they have to land on Tatooine to make repairs.
It's there that they meet Anakin. He's more charming, sarcastic, and kind of a smart-ass in my version and immediately has the hots for Padme when they meet, but not in a creepy way like in the actual prequels. They're relationship is more sweet and playful, kinda like how Rey and Finn were in Force Awakens. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan sense how insanely strong Anakin is in the Force. Anakin wasn't created by the midi-chlorians (which don't exist in my version), and there's no Chosen One prophecy, he just happens to be insanely strong in the Force. Qui-Gon is really amazed with how powerful Anakin is and wants to train him as his padawan since in my version he's never had a padawan before. As for Obi-Wan, he is also amazed with how powerful Anakin is, because that's what he told Luke in Return of the Jedi, but what I would do as a bit of a twist is that Obi-Wan *did* tell Luke most of the story of how Obi-Wan felt about Anakin when they first met, he left out a few details because they were still too painful to bring up. Obi-Wan is amazed at Anakin's power, but he's also kind of jealous and intimidated.
Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, and Padme meet Anakin's mom, Shmi Lars, and his brother, Owen, on the Lars family moisture farm, the same one Luke grew up in, while Anakin and Owen's father had passed away when Anakin was 3, which was also the day Anakin first unleashed the Force. Then they go to Mos Espa and Anakin still has to do the podrace to win the ship parts from Watto, since piloting and podracer are Anakin's two main hobbies. Then Anakin says goodbye to his mother and brother and he's about to leave Tatooine with Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, and Padme, but not before being ambushed by Darth Maul and escaping.
Then they go to Coruscant and Padme goes to explain what's going on with Alderaan to the senate, while Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon bring Anakin to the Jedi Temple. The Jedi council aren't sure if Anakin is Jedi-material and they sense Anakin has too much attachment to his mother and brother back home. Anakin isn't willing to back down so easily because he wants to help the galaxy. The Jedi tell him he can be a Jedi on two conditions: the first is that he has to change his last name, which you already know about, and the second is that Anakin can never see his family on Tatooine again in order to make sure that if they died, Anakin wouldn't turn to the Dark Side. But Qui-Gon is able to convince the council that under his tutorage, Anakin could still see his family and not become too attached to them. The council say that Anakin will be allowed to see his family, but only as long as Qui-Gon is his master.
Anakin and Qui-Gon really begin to bond and develop a father/son bond like in the actual Phantom Menace, while Obi-Wan is still jealous and intimidated of Anakin. Before Anakin came along, Obi-Wan was the most popular Jedi Knight in the order, basically the cool kid at school or whatever you wanna call it, but when Anakin comes along, he's the popular one because the other Jedi are amazed at how Force-senstive Anakin is.
Meanwhile, Padme is unable to prove the senate of the Separatists and Nute Gunray's betrayal, so she, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Padme's droid R4-P22 (R4 was actually first introduced very briefly in the Clone Wars 2-D mini series. In my version he's the droid of the group, similar to R2-D2, C-3P0, and BB-8 in the OT and sequels, and I have a huge plot twist for the end of my version of the prequel trilogy where we find out where R4 was in the OT.), decide to go behind the senate's back and liberate Alderaan themselves and with the help of the gungan rebels. Chancellor Sheev Palpatine secretly provides them with weapons and supplies to help liberate Alderaan, since Alderaan is also his home planet in my version. Anakin has a Force vision in his dreams where he see Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Padme all in danger on the Alderaan and he even sees Qui-Gon being stabbed, so he sneaks on board Padme's ship just before they leave Coruscant and head back to Alderaan so he can prevent the vision from coming true, but he gets caught once they land. Obi-Wan is mad at Anakin for coming along, while Qui-Gon is more understanding. They get the full help of the gungan army, then they take the fight to Theed Palace. On they're way there Obi-Wan tries to convinve Qui-Gon that Anakin is dangerous and shouldn't be trained, but Qui-Gon doesn't believe that and has feeling that, somehow, some day, Anakin will change the galaxy. Qui-Gon also tells Obi-Wan that if he doesn't survive this mission, then he wants Obi-Wan to train Anakin in his place, to which Obi-Wan is very much against.
I'm not trying to potray Obi-Wan as a selfish dick in my version, and there are even some scenes earlier where we see Obi-Wan start to get along with Anakin, but I'm just trying to add more build up to Anakin's turn to the Dark Side from the very beginning and want Obi-Wan to be partly responsible for Anakin's turn to add some more emotion and tension.
Darth Maul is there waiting for the gang at Theed Palace, and Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan duel him, while Anakin, Padme, R4, and the others go to deal with Nute Gunray and rescue the royal family of Alderaan. Anakin tries to explain to Qui-Gon that this is how they could die, but Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan don't listen and fight Maul, while Anakin and the others go to deal with Gunray. They capture Gunray, but the leaders of Alderaan, King and Queen Organa, are caught in the crossfire and killed, leaving their son, Bail Organa, to lead their people. Anakin then senses Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan in danger and rushes to go save them before anyone can stop him, and when he reaches the two Jedi fighting Maul, Anakin distracts Qui-Gon for a split second, which is all Maul needs to take the opportunity to stab Qui-Gon.
Anakin is then enraged and unleashes the Force in a less Light Side-way. He rips parts of the walls and floor out and throws them at Maul, then lifts Maul in the air and Force-chokes him, then slams him back down. Maul lunges at Anakin, but then Anakin unleashes a powerful Force-push at Maul and launches him towards Obi-Wan, who slices Maul's legs off. But don't worry, Maul would get robot legs from Palpatine and still be a villain in my version of the prequels.
Anakin then passes out from using so much Force power, and as Qui-Gon lays dying in Obi-Wan's arms, his last request is that he trains Anakin in his place, and Obi-Wan agrees. Qui-Gon's last words before fading away and becoming one with the Force is:
"Train him as his teacher, guide him as his friend, love him as if he was your brother, and never abandon him. He... will... change the galaxy."
The council approve Obi-Wan to be Anakin's master, but Anakin isn't allowed to see his family on Tatooine since that was only allowed if Qui-Gon was training Anakin.
Obi-Wan secretly blames Anakin for Qui-Gon's death at first, and he even tells the council that the only reason that he's training Anakin is because Qui-Gon wanted it. I know that Obi-Wan said to Luke "I took it upon myself to train him as a Jedi." when they were talking about Anakin in ROTJ, and that IS still true, but we don't find that out until the end of the prequel trilogy.
At the very end of Phantom Menace, Palpatine sends Maul to bust Gunray out of prison and then the Separatists declare war on the Republic. Luckily, Palpatine had a clone army prepared. The Clone Wars have begun.
At the end we do see Obi-Wan begin to like Anakin though as we see him help Anakin construct his lightsaber using a kyber crystal Qui-Gon had given to Anakin before he died. The lightsaber that Anakin builds is the same one that would be passed on to Luke eventually.
I'm still writing the rest of the story, but here's what I've got so far:
My version of Attack of the Clones jumps forward to five years later, Obi-Wan now really likes Anakin and cares for him, and he's no longer jealous or scared of Anakin and honestly sees potential in him. Anakin would still have visions of his mother dying and defy the Jedi council by returning to Tatooine with Padme and R4 to rescue his mother, and he kills the tuskens who did it, but in my version he spares the women and children. I'd even have it be implied that one of the kids he spared grew up to be the tusken who attacked Luke in A New Hope as a cool little easter egg.
Obi-Wan would possibly also go to Tatooine once he hears that Anakin's there. He and Anakin argue a bit and Anakin even kinda blames the Jedi council for his mother's death because they wouldn't let him see his family, and he's also mad at Obi-Wan not only for not trying to persuade the council to let Anakin see his family, but also for lecturing him for defying the council. But the two still put their issues aside to go help the Republic deal with the Separatist forces on Geonosis. Owen and Beru also tag along and Owen tells Obi-Wan to always be there for Anakin from now on. Owen never wanted Anakin to leave Tatooine and get involved with war and Jedi, but he makes Obi-Wan promise to be the big brother to Anakin that Owen himself could never be.
Revenge of the Sith would fast forward either five or eight years later to when Anakin and Padme are both either 25 or 28 (since Obi-Wan said it was a "young" Jedi who turned to the Dark Side and killed Jedi), and Obi-Wan, Owen, and Beru are either 34 or 37.
Anakin and Padme are married now and Padme is pregnant. I'm still trying to decide if either there are certain exceptions for Jedi to get married and start families, or if an exception was made for Anakin that he'd be allowed to marry Padme because of his service to the Jedi and Republic.
Once again Anakin is having bad Force visions, this time of Padme dying. The Jedi council refuse to help him because they're busy getting close to winning the Clone Wars, and they also consider using Force powers that could prevent death to be a Dark Side ability.
To make Anakin more angry at the Jedi, especially Obi-Wan, is that he finally sees hologram recordings of Obi-Wan back in episode 1 telling the council that he doesn't like Anakin or want him to be trained, and he hears Obi-Wan say that he's only training out of respect for Qui-Gon and that Obi-Wan blames Anakin for Qui-Gon's death.
Anakin never knew that Obi-Wan disliked him in episode 1, and Anakin's whole belief that Obi-Wan cared about him and was his brother... was all a lie.
Obi-Wan blaming him and lying to him, as well as the council not helping him, eventually cause him to turn to the Dark Side. There's still good in him since he spares the younglings and helps them escape the Jedi Temple in my version, but when Obi-Wan goes to confront Anakin on Mustafar, Anakin gives his old master a choice: stay out of his way and disappear... or die.
Obi-Wan tries to reach out to Anakin. He explains that only for a very short period of time did he resent and blame Anakin, and he tells him that he no longer felt that way about Anakin. He even reveals that he really did want to train Anakin, not just because Qui-Gon wanted him to, he just didn't want to admit it. He tries to redeem Anakin, but it's no use. The two duel.
Obi-Wan is holding back, but Anakin isn't. Then Obi-Wan has no choice and has to slice off Anakin's legs and leave him stranded on the lava shores. Anakin begs Obi-Wan to help him, and Obi-Wan almost does, but he sees the yellow in Anakin's eyes and chooses to leave his friend to burn. Obi-Wan says that he loved Anakin like a brother, while Anakin screams that he hates Obi-Wan as he leaves Anakin to burn.
After Padme give birth to Luke and Leia, Obi-Wan confides with Yoda and admits that he truly did take it upon himself to train Anakin, just like he said to Luke in ROTJ. He truly did care about Anakin and wanted to train him, he was just too proud and egotistical to admit it at the time. What Obi-Wan told Luke was true, at least... from a certain point of view.
Anakin decides he doesn't want anything more to do with Obi-Wan and doesn't bother going looking for him.
Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi died that day on Mustafar, and in their places were Darth Vader and Ben Kenobi. Both broken men, broken friends, and broken brothers.
What do you all think?
AU (ANAKIN, PLAYS UNDERCOVER BOSS DURING UMBARA) Anakin at this point has left the order, Obi-Wan was ordered to return but Palpatine Had also requested Anakin to return, However, Anakin didn't think this was unimportant so he decided to send a clone dressed up in his clothing and a wig while Anakin deals with umbara. Because he had nightmares about this. And this is the end result)
+---------
Anakin had the Jedi traitor Pong krell by the THROAT,
angered at the croaking noise coming out of the wretched vile quislings vocal cords. He felt so much fear coming off of pile of kark.
In some ways, it almost made up for all of the death that have been caused by him or already had been caused by him.
"That's enough with that." With Anakin's golden robotic hand,He grabbed straight through to krells vocal cords, then almost the precisely pulled back.
Spilling so much fluids and blood onto his 501 armor..
The armor he barely fit (as he was 6'6 and had a wide physique)was painted with blood.
The amount of power in his muscles could rival the mechanical hand. Umbara had indeed turned out to be more important than the chancellor's wishes ( He only wishes that clone trooper he sent disguised did his duty)
Krell dropped to his knees. Gasping for precious gulp of air. He could barely breathe as air went straight to his lungs but he could not speak.
He could only vibrate whatever was left of the chords. Mangled gasps and choking mucus was all that was left. Of the once famed silver tongued warrior.
Anakin's entire posture and persona changed from a rabbid animal to a cold calculating beast.
ready to pounce.
using the blood Was splattered onto him he ruffled it straight through his hair giving him more slick back look. Stained blood red.
Fuck the hair regulation. He look gorgeous. vanity was a vice that a former slave was allowed to excel at.
Intimidation was also an excellent tactic. So using the blood of his enemy as a way of preening his hair (filthy as it may have been) it still sent a message. His vanity was more important in the second then then this soon to be corpses aching pain
Unknowingly Anakin 's eyes had eyes had turned a volcanic blood red, a stark contrast tothe vivid blue That we're usually present.
Using the force he pull the dead man walking up in the air.
Rex and the other 501st members who experienced prophetic visions With their own general Had cheered when The general ripped out the spineless traitors throat. It was a glorious ruthless putdown of the man who was going to send them to their Their deaths fighting their own Brothers.
A random clone, One who Anakin was less familiar with maybe fives. had noticed Anakin about to go for the killing blow called out
"Wait sir!"
" What?! "
Anakin asked almost enraged, Is this clone about to suggest Mercy?
"His crimes were committed Our battalions, the 501st and 212th , First and foremost , secondly, he is guilty OF TREASON AGAINST THE GRAND ARMY OF THE REPUBLIC AS WELL AS CONSPIRACY TO COMMIT AID IN TREASON AGAINST THE GALACTIC REPUBLIC AS WELL AS ABETTING THE ENEMIES
"And?"
"The only valid recompense for that action is Execution by firing squad. SIR"
That had changed Anakins mind, It would be beneath him to deny the pleasure of a well-deserved death.
" Very well then ....We will reconvene for his execution"
It'll be several more hours, but the time had finally come
All of The 501st and 212th as well as any other survivors of the horrors that Pong let happen during umbara Were present. Their trigger finger was itching ready for fire. Their target was tied to a A pair of pillars, his arms holding him up.
"You have been charged with the direct murder of hundreds and the implicit attempt at decimation of a Republic battalion. Sabotage on the highest level. As well as conspiracy to aid and abed the enemy , this is treason on the highest order"
"How do you plead?" Cody askd In a serious tone. Although he knew that this was a farcical trial
They weren't even going to dignify him having his customary blindfold. They wanted him to see the killers as all were locked and loaded with their rifles trained at him.
Krell could only whimper floating in the air meekly, The chains did nothing but were a moral support for the troops.
He would have died of loss of fluids at this rate. Had Anakin not been keeping him alive through the force never allowing him to die
With his non-robotic hand Anakin
signaled for the troops all of them to raise their blasters directly at their target
On your marks men!
Ready.!
Aim! ! FIRE,!
With that, the "THE GRAND FIRING SQUAD OF THE REPUBLIC "as was it mockingly called unleashed a hail storm of blaster bolts on The traitorous Jedi scum.
By the end the Jedi would be almost unrecognizable. A burning husk That was unceremoniously dropped with a splat..
"Gentleman. ..." Anakin began to ask, "What happened here today? Or rather ..... what will be reported?"
Anakin asked The entire battalion They would either hang together or hang alone. This was a act of rebellious treason, slaughtering a High-Ranking Jedi. Even if His crimes were clear to all in the firing squad, This was clear. Their general was giving them A chance of legal anonymity. There was plenty of distaste for lying lying however, again, many of the troops knew that if they didn't lie, They would be dead. For supposed treason.
The room was silent until one spoke up.
"He was a traitor and got many of us killed! death was the only reconciliatory action" Clicker said
,He was sabotaging the war effort" ratchet roared
"The bastard dropped into a trap and got shot to oblivion? "
"He put men against each other for the sake of his own greed," another piped up
It was then then The clone Commander Rex suggested "Maybe he Tripped on a landmine?"
Commander Cody followed up " dodging bullets separatist?"
"I'm liking that , He went out like an idiot but it was his own fault . I believe the council would fall for this form of deception. All in favor" Anakin asked in a mock vote -----&----
Palpatine listening to Anakin Brag about what happened With a smile. He was annoyed at the clone deception but he figured it was fine for the most part Anakin was a war hero And his strike force leader, If he genuinely felt that some sort of issues required his attention more enough to subvert his authority, Palpatine at least trusted that Anakin knew what he was doing When it came to war.
But frankly, now he was in rapturous Joy at what his strike Force leader was at length bragging. Executing a Jedi for treasonous behavior? He simply asked
"To shreds, you say?'. He asked with a grin.
In my version they go from being noble protectors well liked by the public in Episode I to being viewed as incompetent and distrusted in Episode II to power grabbers because they have high ranking military position in Episode III.
Imagine this.
Anakin’s going to have a vision of Dooku taking Shmi and then a Blue Lightsaber killing her. He doesn’t know Dooku is a Sith, so he believes it’s him.
He goes to Tatooine, and she’s gone. He’ll get mad when Watto refuses to tell him where she is without being paid. He’ll Force Choke Watto, learn about Shmi being let go, and leave.
He’ll then go to Owen’s Farm, and Beru’s his sister, but before he left, he had a really close relationship with Owen. Owen wanted him to stay and use his Force Abilities to help with getting out slaves. Anakin wanted to be a Jedi, and promised him and Shmi he’d be back and be there for him, he never went back.
Owen’s mad that he didn’t keep his promise, he’ll tell him to bring Shmi back, and then never speak to him again. He’ll tell him that a Force-User took her.
On Geonosis, Dooku will keep saying that he has Shmi, but he doesn’t give people reason to believe him beyond just saying it. Obi-Wan, Yoda, and Windu will believe he’s attempting to egg on Anakin and tell Anakin to stay put and not go to battle with Dooku; as he’d give into fear. Windu will threaten to kick him.
After Windu and Obi-Wan get cooked by Dooku, Anakin will come in, Dooku will reveal Shmi. He’ll tell Anakin, in battle, that he’s able to kill Shmi with a flick of his wrist if he wanted to and relishes that feeling. Anakin will attack him with more anger, and then lose his arm.
Dooku will say, “If only you had stayed and kept your promise.”
Anakin gives into his rage, and will attack Dooku, about to kill him, but Dooku will use The Force to fling Shmi in front of him, and Anakin will END UP killing his own mother instead, and her last sentence is her blaming The Jedi for all of this.
Yoda comes in, does his thing, Dooku will flee, and then back at The Jedi Temple, The Jedi want to expel Anakin, although not in 100% agreement, but Palpatine will make them make him a Jedi Knight of The Republic, not a Jedi Knight of The Order, thus creating a stigma and good reputation around Anakin.
Palpatine will then tell Anakin that he’s angry, but he can use that anger for something good, and that The Jedi won’t be able to tell him otherwise. That anger almost killed Dooku, and then Anakin will interrupt.
“And next time, it will.”
So I had like a fanfic idea,
Requirements (First
Age Anakin up to be a year or so younger than padme.)
He enters the Jedi order as a angstty 13 year old
Okay, Anakin being an angry hedgehog with no or little to no friends in the Jedi Order. basically does some ROTC training for the Coruscant militia when he was 19
This is before the clone War.
Anakin and padme both marry at 19-20.
This gives them a few years of peace and he's training for the Coruscant military.
Because he wants to get experience for abolitionist uprisings later down the line.
This is also a loud by the Jedi order because of an old ruusan law that allows a Jedi to become a member of a military unit for for training, This also is pitched to the council as a way for him to learn some anger management.
This also slowly develops the divide Anakin and Obi-Wan has later on, an Anakin would be the one with the most military experience going into the clone Wars.
Eventually as Anakin rises in the ranks and an the Jedi makes its blunders
He leaves the order viewing the chains that bind the order to the senate chains that came from Ruusan
His friend Barris offee(The Legends variant where he grew up with her) leaves and ahsoka leaves
So ANAKIN Leaves THE ORDER.
And fully become a part of the grand army of the Republic as a commissioned higher officer which palpatine has control over as chancellor. Sending Anakin to wherever he needed for the war
Obi-Wan saw himself as a bit of a failure, so he asks the Jedi Order to stripped him of his leadership and he would have left
The council could not have that instead they thought it was best if Anakin as a high member of the Republican Armada
If Obi-Wan acts as an ambassador to to the order with Anakin and keep him in the view
Anakin still has a lightsaber (built from parts from scraps and palpatine provided the expensive parts and rubber stamped his licenses as a registered lightsaber holder.
Legally
he doesn't need the Jedi
hes payed handsomely as a specialist and a military high command officer and on the ground hero
Essentially he becomes The chancellors personal strike Force Commander with his personal battalion Of the 501st efforts are ensure the end of the cis
At this point Palpatine has already has the chosen one.
Obi-Wan Kenobi remains Anakin's only Jedi friend eventually when the Jedi see the palpatine's treachery, Anakin intercedes Macy's blow for the chancellor.
Anakin my friend, I feel that the Jedi are too powerful. They are too dogmatic too stuck in their ways I beg you to spare the younglings but you must cut this Hydra where where it stands use fire, Or else two heads will take its place.
And thus Anakin charges forward with the 501st leading the charge against the Jedi Order
Obi-Wan sees his friend in In the footage.
In the end, comrade against comrade brother against brother.
But In the ashes of this furious fight rises anew hero or villain for the empire Darth Vader
Just another idea I had while writing Episode 3 REDONE. I am talking about REDONE's Battle of Coruscant, not the movie.
As the story currently plays in REDONE, in the opening battle, the ARC trooper team storms into Grievous' flagship to assist the Jedi, so that when the Jedi rescue Palpatine, they meet at the rendevous point and make an escape through where the ARC troopers have entered. However, the ARC troopers are slaughtered by Grievous before they report the situation to Anakin. Clueless, the Jedi and Palpatine arrive at the rendevous point, only to be ambushed by Grievous and his droids.
I looked at this part of the story again and thought the emotional investment was lacking whenever the story switched to the ARC troopers. The story switches the POV three times to them, even though the ARC troopers don't really play an important part in the story. They get slaughtered quickly.
Another thing I thought was lacking was the interaction between Anakin and Padme. In the outline I revealed a few weeks ago, there are still too few meaningful Anakin-Padme scenes. First in the refugee camp where Padme reveals her pregnancy, second in the motel scene where they talk about the Greycoats and the future of their lives, and third in the dinner scene, where Padme and Anakin have a major conflict regarding Palpatine's ways of governance. From there, Padme is rendered incapacitated and spends the rest of the story unconscious.
It is a shame that we don't see Padme in action as a warrior princess and a Republic agent whatsoever, as we did in Episode 2 REDONE. Her role is largely relegated to the dialogue scenes like how the movie played out.
So I had an idea to integrate Padme in the opening battle on Coruscant. Not as part of the Jedi team, but she would be the one leading the ARC troopers aboard the Invisible Hand. She is wearing the same trooper armor as the ARC trooper as a space suit.
The ARC troopers get slaughtered, and Grievous takes her as the only captive. So when the Jedi team arrives at the rendevous point, Grievous uses her to threaten Anakin to put the weapons down.
When they get to the cockpit, it's Padme doing something to free Anakin and Obi-Wan's cuffs, not R2-D2. Padme is the one helping a leg-broken Obi-Wan and guarding him, while Anakin is on the aggressive, dispatching the droid guards. This makes more sense than Anakin taking two responsibilities of guarding Obi-Wan and destroying the droids simultaneously. When Anakin is piloting the flagship to safely crash land, it is also her life on the line, alongside Obi-Wan and Palpatine, which boosts the stakes.
I like this addition because this makes the opening sequence more emotionally resonating. It makes her role more meaningful and active, demonstrating her chemistry with Anakin, all the while without having to explain what their relationship is through dialogues later in the story. We can just show their dynamics through action.
However, a pregnant woman doing all this is kind of ridiculous, considering her pregnancy is what makes her stay away from the frontline on Kashyyyk, and work as a nurse in the Republic camps. It is difficult to accept that she would risk herself on such a dangerous mission, knowing there are fetuses inside her belly.
I guess the story can hint at her pregnancy by making her suffer morning sickness. Because she is wearing the trooper armor, we don't see her swollen belly, and she doesn't tell Anakin and Obi-Wan about her pregnancy.
What do you think? I think the pros of this change benefit the first act of ROTS REDONE greatly.
I believe you have seen the early draft of Episode 2 REDONE Version 10, which drastically alters Padme's characterization and role in the story. Basically, she is an Alderaanian princess, who serves as the Alderaanian Security Force, as well as Bail Organa's Senatorial Aide. After the Separatist occupation of Alderaan and witnessing their atrocities, she became hawkish. She was also disillusioned with the ineffectiveness of her job as a Senatorial Aide, believing she could not contribute to the good of the Republic, so he longed to be back as a field agent. Episode 2 REDONE pairs her with Anakin throughout, and Anakin and Padme form a bond due to their similar repressed position as well as the shared disillusionment of the status quo.
With the increased importance of Padme's character, I have also been thinking about the new outline for ROTS REDONE. It wouldn't be as big of a departure from the past versions as Episode 2 REDONE was, but I don't think I can just make her unconscious for half of the story.
I decided to make a new rough outline and post it so that I can hear your thoughts on it.
So the story begins in the same manner as the previous REDONE. Anakin and Obi-Wan's rescue of Palpatine is the same, with Maul (who filled Dooku's role from the film) dead and Grievous escaping. Anakin loses his Mastership for executing Maul in revenge, which is an egregious violation of the Jedi Code. The Jedi Council needed Maul alive as he was the only lead of this "Sidious", who the Jedi suspect to be the Sith Lord that stole the identity of Sifo-Dyas and ordered the creation of the Separatist clone army.
Afterward, Anakin sneaks out of the Temple and meets a pregnant Padme in the refugee shelter in the bombed-out city. They are now in a full romantic relationship but have been apart for six months. She is still a Senatorial Aide for Bail Organa, but she has been increasingly working more as a Republic agent because the Alderaanian Intelligence by this point has been disbanded and united into the Republic Intelligence Service. She has been given a vacation due to pregnancy. Her loyalty is conflicted between her homeworld Alderaan or the Republic. She is also being spied on, which is one of the reasons why she is meeting Anakin in the refugee shelter.
In the Security Act convo in Yoda's room, it’s Bail Organa’s hologram attending, not being there. Here, it is revealed that Padme was the whistleblower, who leaked the new amendment to Bail, using her position within the Republic Intelligence.
In the motel, Anakin awakes from his nightmare of Padme dying, but he cannot find her in the room. He searches around the room, but hears the noise outside. The Greycoats are lynching a Neimodian in the alleyway outside the motel. The civilizations and even the stormtroopers pass by, ignoring the lynching entirely.
The Greycoats are the nickname of the SAGroup of COMPOR (Commission for the Protection of the Republic). They are largely comprised of the refugees that fled the Separatist-occupied systems, and are Palpatine's tool in expanding his control in the society. As the state-supported paramilitary political hooligans, they conduct vigilante justice against suspected Separatists, propagandize the Republic, and exercise more authority than the police in the Republic-occupied systems. They became a force to crush anyone who opposes Supreme Chancellor Palpatine in the society.
Only Padme is trying to stop the lynching. The Greycoats begin surrounding Padme and threaten her. Witnessing it, Anakin jumps out of the window, drops down several floors down to the ground, and slashes the Greycoats' weapons. Anakin threatens them to leave and not tell this to their bosses, or else he will know. The Greycoats flee. Anakin and Padme talk, something like:
Padme: "I could have handled them alone, but now everyone else saw us together."
Anakin: “They're not going to report this”
Padme: "My favorite lie is that everything is gonna be okay. The Greycoats will not forget this."
Then they discuss Anakin's dream, which leads to Padme confessing her disillusionment with the war and Palpatine.
Anakin: "They are well intended, but everyone has bad days. This was one of them."
Padme: "Palpatine promoted those thugs as part of the police forces. He appointed his loyalists in the ranks of the military."
Anakin: “Everything has a bad side to it. Just depends on if you want to look at it in an optimistic or pessimistic light.”
Padme: “That was what I thought, too, but that was five years ago.”
Anakin: “You did say the Republic needs a big cleanup, but if you want to do that, don't you have to agitate? Organize? Struggle?"
Padme: "Governance is enforced through action, not by the motivation for such action."
Anakin: "Correct. You're a little confused by the change in action because up until now you've dealt with it only in words."
Padme: "From looking at the actions, the state of siege has now entered the military itself."
Anakin: "Our Grand Army has become so grand that formal cohesion is far from enough. The Greycoats need to become the instrument to overcome that. We must be more disciplined than ever before. What’s your credentials to say otherwise?”
Padme: “I’m not an idiot. That’s my credentials.”
Anakin: “You’ve changed. You’ve changed a lot.”
Padme: “But you're the same as ever: clueless. You haven't been here, Anakin. You've been off fighting the war in the Outer Rim. You don't know what it's been like, dealing with all the petty squabbles and special interests and grasping fools, and Palpatine's ruthless maneuvering for power."
Anakin: "You think anyone’s listening to you? The enemies are spreading, and you're suggesting inaction? Only the harmonious military could enforce justice, by the Greycoats if need be."
Padme: "The moment you believe that you are absolutely just, that justice is dead."
Anakin: “If we shouldn’t care what our enemies think or call us, we shouldn’t even try to pander to them.”
Padme: "Not them. Us. He carves away chunks of our freedom and bandages the wounds with tiny scraps of security. And for what?”
Padme points at the crashed Star Destroyer that has pierced the underground of Coruscant.
Padme: “Look at this planet! We have given up so much freedom for the last five years! How secure do we look?"
Anakin: “How many of the battles have been won? How many new schools, roads, hospitals, and houses have been built? How many slaves have been freed?”
Padme: “Only the human slaves.”
Anakin: “So far. Do you think any of this would have happened without Palpatine? Are you fine with that? Idealism over pragmatism? Instead of complaining, I’d like to go out and build more. We must put all of the disdain aside and join the rest of flawed reality to fight."
Padme: “The thing about denials is that they work.”
Padme then tries to persuade Anakin to retire from the generalship, which means leaving the Jedi Order. They discuss having to live a lie, wondering what to do when their child is born. Padme is scared the Jedi might take the child away.
While discussing, Padme receives a message from Bail Organa to come to Alderaan. The Chancellor has appointed the Governors in charge of Alderaan. Padme is separated from Anakin again and rushes back to Alderaan.
Then the story goes the same. The Separatists invade Kashyyyk, Anakin confesses his dream to Yoda, and Obi-Wan asks Anakin to be the Council's snitch.
Then we cut to Padme arriving at Alderaan, which is now in full military occupation under martial law, and from the POV of Padme, we witness the Republic occupation under the new governor system.
The marches of the Greycoats parade the newly appointed Governor throughout the city. The citizens are forced to kneel before the march. An old couple doesn't kneel. The Greycoat his pistol and cracks his head. Dorme goes out to protest but is beaten by four Greycoats. Padme tries to stop them by punching them, but the stormtroopers rush in to restrain her.
This whole sequence was originally written for The Last Jedi REDONE. It initially starred Kor Sella as a POV character, witnessing the First Order’s occupation, but I thought it didn’t match the more jovial tone and didn’t mesh with the plot (and who cares about Kor Sella), so I removed it, but kept it just in case I might use it in somewhere else. As I began writing this revision of ROTS REDONE, the story was missing a visualization of the loss of freedom and democracy under the newly changing Republic, so I put a subplot where Padme visits her changed homeworld. I thought that the deleted scene from TLJ REDONE would work well with Padme’s visit to Alderaan, so I decided to repurpose that deleted scene here.
When troopers beat people, three or four people concentrate one to watermelon his head. Dorme’sscalps split and his blood splatters at the spot. The trooper drags the exhausted Dorme covered in blood alongside Padme into the military speeder truck. It is filled up with people in seconds. People are thrown into it until it cannot hold anymore.
Inside the truck, a radio operator has been waiting. His face is not normal, as if drunk ten cups of Ardees. As soon as the prisoners get boarded, he pins the prisoners down on the floor like flapping fishes. He steps them with his boots as if he is handling livestock. People groan on the floor, and their clothes are ripped to pieces, and their flesh peels all the way to their back.
Then the speeder is on the move toward the Alderaanian Palace building, the symbol of Alderaan now functioning as a concentration camp. A massive holoscan of Chancellor Palpatine stands before the palace like a statue.
Another truck flies alongside the other. There, the trooper is throwing the prisoners one by one, screaming, out of the trucks. They fall fifty meters to death.
INT.Alderaanian Palace. Entrance.
Arriving at the destination, a stormtrooper kicks Padme in the back out of the truck speeder. Stormtroopers simply chuck out people and throw them out of the vehicle, but the falls and their shoves are the beginning of the torture. Padme, Dorme, and the other prisoners climb up fast to line up. Some of the prisoners are left in the truck, unable to move at all. A moment later, the army troopers get into the speeder and blast them like cleaning a truck.
The Republic transfers the prisoners to the palace. The troops are pulling down a massive Alderaanian flag and replacing with a Republic one on the wall. The building is guarded by several stormtrooper squads, each of them lined up in a V shape, holding bayonetted blasters positioned forward—their razors have a blue hue. They are aiming their rifles forward as if they are demonstrating bayonet skills. It looks like they would pull the trigger or stab anyone right away.
It is here that the prisoners are being interned. Anyone protesting the new rule—professors, journalists, intellectuals, activists, artists, students, unionists, royalists, separatist-sympathizers, workers, and every nonhuman. There are sparse blastershots across the hall, sometimes distant and near. Thousands of prisoners are already present before the building, all of them tied in the back. The injured have a wound on the right side of the head due to most Army troopers being right-handed. Those who tried to flee during arrest have wounds in the back of the head.
At the side of the corridor, there are heaps of corpses, of which there are thirty child-size ones, covered with shrouds so that people cannot see whether they are sick or dead. Some sheets are taken off, revealing the bodies. They have some parts that seem as though they have been torn off. It is something she cannot bear to open her eyes to see. All the time ambulance speeders are leaving, too, transporting the bodies which they take out in stretchers, a sheet covering them.
The speeder transports arrive with new prisoners, all come with the classic posture that almost epitomizes this planet now, hands tied behind.
Stormtrooper Sergeant #1: “Lie down!”
The prisoners prostrate themselves on the cement floor. The blows they receive when they hit the ground are terrible. Whoever struggles receives a rifle butt and a boot. If someone screams, they get a bayonet gash. Among them is a Gungan, whose hand is shattered by a boot, not just bleeding but entirely shattered, but he is so trampled that he cannot even scream in protest.
A piloting soldier in the speeder cockpit shrieks. Having experienced the shocking events of the day, even a few of the troopers seem to weep in secret. They also feel fear and anger.
As far as Padmecan see there are hundreds of troops, positioning people and beating them even before interrogating them. Army troopers are always beating people without ever stopping, hitting them with rifle butts, without worrying about whether they would leave a mark or not. She can also see the children and elders among the prisoners. The troopers force the prisoners to remain standing in line. Some people ask, almost begging the soldiers.
Prisoner #1: “Where are we going?”
Prisoner #2: “Just tell us what will happen to us—”
Anyone who moves or talks is thrown on the floor and buttstroken. The door to the assembly room opens, and a Ggreycoat waves at the troopers to let the prisoners in. The troopers would beat the prisoners to enter the chamber in a group of fifty. There is immense terror everytime the Greycoat waves his hand. None of the prisoners has a way of knowing whether they are going to die or not.
Gungan Mother: “Murderers! What yousa doen to boy?!” A Gungan mother is screaming at the troopers as they are taking her son away. The Governor is not just taking the individual political prisoners; they are taking their whole families, and all of them are subjected to continuous violence.
Gungan Son: “Stay out of disa, ma!”
The people begin to shout. Some are trying to calm down the situation. A Greycoat comes into the scene.
Greycoat #1: “Who was that?”
Gungan Mother: “Leave him alone!”
Trooper: “Sir, this Gunganis rebelling.”
The Greycoat looks at the mother.
Greycoat#1: "Come over here, madam."
She walks over to him, calm. When she reaches the greycoat, he snatches a blaster rifle from the trooper and shoots her in the face. The Gungan is missing a lower jaw.
The Greycoat then begins firing a volley of shots in the direction of where the mother came from, provoking a tremendous panic. It is instantaneous. Screams and shouts erupt from all directions. Eight people die, among them is her son. The mother’s jaw is crushed, but she is still alive and wheezing blood. A trooper nearby has to euthanize her with a blaster.
Then there is a scream nearby. The prisoner behind Padme has fallen, and the trooper has drawn a bayonet behind him.
Trooper: “Go!”
He stabbed him for not moving. Padmehurries on, continuing into the assembly room, where once filled with politicians, now with political prisoners.
INT.Alderaanian Palace. Assembly Room.
The troopers take fifty prisoners into the massive assembly room that resembles a stadium. The door closes shut. The recorded Republic anthem, All Stars Burn as One, is playing on repeat in the parliament chamber at high volume to enhance the psychological suffering. A shadow casting over Padme prompts her to look up. There are repulsorpods floating above them, but these platforms are not occupied by the politicians, but the Greycoats, who are overseeing everything.
Dorme: “Galactic Republic, Star Systems United. Under our flags, All Stars Burn As One!”
The prisoners turn to find the source of the voice.
Dorme: “We will fight to protect, Always will protect, The laws of our democracy!”
Dorme standing next to Padmeis singing the Republic anthem ironically in defiance of the Republic rule.
Dorme: “We will not be ruled by thy, Who seek to destroy, Who seek to destroy, Who seek to destroy!”
Before the rest of the prisoners sings, the two stormtroopers step in and take her out. She has to be silenced soon. Dorme becomes frightened.
Dorme: “Our lordly democracy! Ruled o'er by the people! Voices that will always, That'll always be heard—”
The troopers administer buttstrokes on Dorme’s face, dropping her to the floor, then beat her all over the body. The noise her skull makes and the blood coming out of her nose are terrible. They smash until, well, until her head is squashed. She is not dead and is just twitching. The Greycoat pushes the gathering prisoners aside and stomps her skull several more times until she is still.
Padme screams and takes hold of the corpse. They murdered her in front of hundreds of people. Seeing her on the floor invokes something. Anger, sadness, some other emotions Padme does not have the names for. The people are so perturbed they cannot move. Moments later, the Republic anthem ceases, and there is a strange silence.
Greycoat #2: “Move on, Separatist scum!”
The line of prisoners walks on, passing eight stormtroopers with each of them stationing their repeating blaster in the distance.
Greycoat: “Head to the wall!”
Stormtrooper Sergeant: “Move! Quick!”
Padme realizes they are not here for an interrogation, but to be shot. Although the bodies are gone, one could still see evidence of the execution as there is blood on the wall and at times even chunks of flesh that had been splattered. The smell of burning flesh is in the air.
The other prisoner realizes the same. He resists and charges at the door to flee, but the troopers block him.
Prisoner #3: “Forgive me! I’m not a Separatist! I’ve done nothing!”
The Greycoat shoots him in the eye. He dies straight.
Greycoat #2: “Face the damned wall!”
The prisoners comply, and the troopers aim their repeating blaster like it is their job.
Prisoner #4: “I can tell who the Separatists are—“
Stormtrooper Sergeant: “Shut up.”
Padme lashes out in a final attempt.
Padme: “I’m the Senatorial Aide of Senator Bail Organa! I must—”
Army Trooper Sergeant: “Turn, you Separatist whore!”
The trooper buttstrokes her in the back.
Greycoat #2: “If you don’t turn, you are gonna sell your body, even for His Excellency.”
Padme turns, and the Greycoat raises his hand. Padme contends that her service is done. Now, there is no hope. She will be one with the Force alongside the others on this planet and thousands more worlds.
Bail Organa: “Stop!”
The firing squad lowers its repeating blasters.
Bail Organa: “She is telling the truth! She is my Senatorial Aide!”
Bail Organa gets into the arena and finds Padme. He has been looking for her.
Bail Organa: “Your Highness. Follow me.”
Stormtrooper Sergeant: “But Senator, she attacked our troops!”
Greycoat #2: “Senator?!”
Bail Organa: “I am Bail Organa, the brother of the late Chancellor Valorum Organa! We are under the protection of Chancellor Palpatine!”
Greycoat #2: “He’s the traitor! Stop him!”
Stormtrooper Sergeant: “But sir, he’s a member of the Loyalist Committee. We can’t do anything about him.”
The Greycoat tries to object, but he can’t object to what Bail said. They are under the Chancellor’s protection. He stutters for seconds until he screams:
Greycoat #2: “Long Live the Republic!”
The soldiers all chant.
Republic Troopers: “Long Live the Republic!”
Greycoat #2: “Glory to Chancellor Palpatine!”
Republic Troopers: “Glory to Chancellor Palpatine!”
Greycoat #2: “Death to the Separatists!”
Republic Troopers: “Death to the Separatists!”
The troopers and greycoats all chant, but they have no choice but to watch Bail taking Padme away across the chamber. Without her, the stormtrooper sergeant leads the firing squad. She turns to look before she walks up the stairs. The execution proceeds. As soon as he lowers his arm, the blasters open fire. The bodies of the prisoners tear apart beyond recognition before the overwhelming blasterfires, leaving only the ankles.
She is not even fazed by this. She has reached the point where nothing surprises or disturbs her anymore. She is so desensitized. She does not know if she should be concerned about this or not.
Then we get the opera scene with Anakin and Palpatine (the opera is propaganda of Palpatine). Palpatine promises to him that those Greycoats who laid their hands on Anakin and Padme in the streets have been dealt with, and as an apology, he promotes Anakin to the Supreme Commander.
Back on Alderaan. Bail has gathered the trusted friends (Mon Mothma, Padme, Ric Olie, Iridik’k-stallu, Fang Zar, Terr Taneel, and Giddean Danu) in his residence, which is surounded by the Greycoats outside, chanting “Catching thieves may seem like oppression to thieves, but to neighbors, it is making justice. If eradicating enemies within our society is political terrorism, then such terrorism must be carried out everyday!”, “Bail Organa the Traitor! Mon Mothma the Separatist! We the people demand to grant our Supreme Chancellor Palpatine the authority he needs to assure total victory! Do Not Bind His Hands!” The discussion plays the same way as the past version, with Iridik’k-stallu being the one stealthly recording the conversation for Palpatine. Padme says using Anakin's connections she will meet face to face with the Chancellor to stop this new policy by volunteering to the Battle of Kashyyyk.
Then we see the gunship scene where Obi-Wan, Mace Windu, and Yoda discuss if they can trust Anakin as their snitch. They get to the Star Destroyer to find that Palpatine has promoted Anakin as the Supreme Commander of the Grand Army. The mobilized Republic fleet then heads to Kashyyyk to defeat Grievous.
From here, I am not sure how it would exactly play out, so I am spitballing here. Padme boards the Star Dreadnought while the Republic attack fleet is halted temporarily to mobilize the ships from other places. She can see the army gearing up for the battle of Kashyyyk. She attends the dinner congratulating Anakin's new rank as the Supreme Commander (like the dinner scene from Dune), and the arms industrialists, security contractors, corporate security enforcers, and defense suppliers for the Republic, representing Corporate Sector Authority, Kuat Drive Yards, Sienar Fleet Systems, Preox-Morlana, TransGalMeg, and dozen others, have taken their seats.
Some of the dialogue was borrowed from Star Wars Radio Drama.
Palpatine: “I am a man of my word. Without you loyal entrepreneurs, this war would not have won.”
Braig Farool: “And now to business. We have been anxious to discuss the post-war transformation of the economy.”
Palpatine: “The new stabilized economy will be deferred to experts. You, compatriots, are experts.”
Raith Sienar: “My company executive board’s already pledged its support for the new government.”
Kuat Director: “Then our corporation will produce more Star Destroyers for a smooth transition.”
ExO: “What about my Corporate Sector Authority? I’m not pledging support until we have our fair share.”
Palpatine: “When the last of the Separatists falls, their assets will be relocated to our new Corporate Sector. It will bring all of you profits beyond your wildest imagination.”
Then they discuss the recent Separatist situation.
Tarkin: “Now I’ll tell you something about these Aquilaen (it can be the other planet) Separatists who call themselves freedom fighters… they don’t understand a thing about war. The fools on that particular planet actually thought that we would negotiate with a pack of fanatics!”
Laugh
Tarkin: “So when their leaders showed up to parley, our ships blasted them to pieces!”
Laugh
Officer: “No one thought it odd to believe those Aquilaens have no values beyond enriching themselves under the name of tolerance.”
Anakin: "You have no other way to deal with them but to break them or they will break you."
Tarkin: “I don't have a problem with Aquilaens specifically. It's that everything I learn about them is against my moral fiber.”
Padme looks dejected. Palpatine, at this point, secretly knows about Padme's intention due to the wiretapping.
Palpatine: “What’s the matter, Princess Amidala? Has he failed to amuse you?”
Padme: “I’d like to think the value of lives is the same regardless of where they belong.”
Anakin: “Alderaan is a world of peace. They have suffered enough of the war.”
Tarkin: "Yes, peace. But there is always a price for peace."
Officer: "The Republic under attack must defend itself with vigor.”
Padme: “Indeed… but exactly why did the Aquilaens rebel, Admiral Tarkin?”
Tarkin: “They were Separatists.”
Padme: “They were our alliance throughout the war. They only changed when you tried to impose your governor’s rule on their system.”
Tarkin: “Nevertheless, that still makes them Separatists. Our job is to dismantle separatism as a concept.”
Anakin: "There can't be the slightest trace of separatism, whatever its manifestations in the future. It's our duty to ensure the citizens' well-being."
Padme: "Well being?"
Tarkin: “And the Republic’s unity. Our duty is to protect the seventy percent of the galaxy. As for the other thirty percent, we have nothing to appease. They will be exterminated."
Padme: “Admiral Tarkin, what you mean by unity is getting in line and conforming to your rule. Being different is a threat.”
Palpatine: "Now, Your Highness, just what was your purpose in coming here?"
Padme: “Your Excellency, if I may… I find this system of governors you have created is troubling. It seems that you are imposing military controls even on loyalist systems.”
Palpatine: "Your reservations are noted, Princess Amidala. I assure you the appointment of Governors will in no way compete with the affairs of your homeplanet.”
Padme: “I wish that you instruct governors not to interfere with Alderaan’s legitimate governance.”
Palpatine: "The governors are intended only to make your systems safer. They are not undemocratic. Far from it, they are necessary weapons of the democracy. Surely, as a victim of the Separatist invasion, you can understand this more than anyone."
Padme: "May I take it then, that there will be no further amendments to the Constitution?"
Palpatine: “Once the Separatists have been defeated, then we can start talking about the Constitution again. Once the war ends, the emergency powers expire automatically.”
Padme: “And your governors? Will they expire, too? How long does the emergency powers exist?"
Palpatine: "Until the Separatists have been driven out from the general populous. You are lucky that these governors exist. When we go, civilization will, too."
Padme: "But surely--"
Palpatine gets up.
Palpatine: "I have said I will do what is right, that should be enough for your concern."
Palpatine's aides leave the table, leaving only Anakin and Padme alone in the table.
Anakin: “Where's your civility?"
Padme: “There's no reason for me to be nice when people are speaking evil but doing so in a polite tone of voice."
Anakin: “You were speaking before Palpatine and Tarkin!"
Padme: “Saying the most disgusting words with decorum is one of the most horrible things you can do. I’m done, Anakin. I'm getting out… After this battle, I’m leaving.”
Anakin: “If you want to give up a victory, give up.”
Padme: “Come to Alderaan and look for some victory. You'll find stormtroopers and greycoats.”
Anakin: “This is a war. We're fighting the Separatists on the inside and their handlers on the outside.”
Padme: "Sometimes I wonder if we're on the wrong side."
Anakin: "The wrong side? You think everything we’ve accomplished has been for nothing?”
Padme: “What if the democracy we’re fighting for no longer exists? What if the Republic itself has become the very evil we’ve been fighting to destroy?”
Anakin: “All the danger, all the suffering, all the killing, all my friends who gave their lives? All for nothing?"
Padme: "Everything is run from the top, by the governors like unquestioned kings, and in turn, they do what Palpatine tells them. The Republic has turned on itself."
Anakin: "You're starting to sound like a Separatist."
Padme: “Anakin, Palpatine’s governor enacted a military rule on my planet. He closed down every independent newsholo and sold out our industries to the megacorporations. Am I describing the policies of the Republic or the Separatists? This was Nute Gunray’s wet dream!”
Anakin: “The present government is an exact expression of the will of the citizens. Palpatine’s authority is based on responsibility to the people, rather than institutions and oligarchs.”
Padme says, “How can you say he’s challenging the oligarchical rule when he’s now using the oligarchy as a tool?”
Anakin: “It’s to mobilize the Republic for war against its enemies.”
Padme: “What enemies? Nonhumans his Greycoats have been murdering? Or the local Senators he’s been cracking down?”
Anakin: “They are Separatist-sympathizers. It’s messy, but he’s getting the work that’s needed to be done. Because he supports people in deed, not just in word.”
Padme: “Palpatine concedes everything to the very elites he rode his horse to power. But more though I put myself into his antics more grow to resent this absolute scum.”
Anakin: “He keeps bureaucracies and institutions in check to make sure they don’t become corrupt. Everything else is a Separatist plot.”
Padme: “What happened to you?”
Anakin sighs. He gets up and responds.
Anakin: “You can’t survive a war by being an idealist. As a general, I’d rather think of those I wish to save than those I would sacrifice.”
Anakin goes after Palpatine, who had left the dinner to apologize to him for bringing Padme.
Palpatine: “It was not her bag to embrace political discourse. It makes her a nice girl, but also head in the sand.”
Anakin: "I apologize, Your Excellency. I should never have brought her here."
Palpatine: "She proposed nothing more or less than a reversion to the chaos when the Republic's fate hung in the balance. How could anyone see the conditions of that time as something ideal?"
Anakin: "She would rather be pure and lose than win. In the end with this mindset, we will lose everything."
Palpatine: "Sensible attitude, Anakin. Speaks well of your patriotism.”
There, like the previous version, Palpatine reveals to Anakin what he overheard--the Senators are moving to remove him, and the Jedi Council is in it. Obi-Wan is in close contact with them. However, Palpatine tries to persuade them that the Jedi are trying to kill Padme because they deem her untrustworthy due to her relationship with Anakin. I don't exactly know how it could play out, but Anakin needs to believe that this group is trying to harm Padme and her relationship with Anakin.
Palpatine: “I find myself inspecting every shadow that might hide an enemy. That is what I need from you. I need you to find the truth."
Anakin: "…I can do that."
Palpatine: "Good, Anakin. Good. I knew I could count on you."
Then the story plays similarly. Anakin uses R2-D2 to record the Jedi Council meeting on the Dreadnought and overhears they are considering removing Palpatine by force. They also speculate that Anakin and Padme have offspring, which means expelling Anakin out of the Order and taking the child into their custody.
Anakin confronts Obi-Wan in the hangar before Obi-Wan departs for the mission. Talking about the collusion between the Council and the Senators, and about Padme. Here, you can add that "if it works" dialogue.
Obi-Wan: "Well, how would you have it work?”
Anakin: “We need a system where the politicians sit down and discuss the problem, agree on what’s in the best interests of the people, and then do it.”
Obi-Wan: “Which is exactly what they do. The trouble is that people don’t always agree.”
Anakin: “Then they should be made to.”
Obi-Wan: “By whom? Who is going to make them?”
Anakin: “I don’t know. Someone.”
Obi-Wan: “You?”
Anakin: “Of course not me!”
Obi-Wan: “But someone.”
Anakin: “Someone wise.”
Obi-Wan: “That sounds an awful lot like a dictatorship."
Anakin: “Well, if it works…”
The Republic forces land on Kashyyyk, and Obi-Wan meets Padme, where he nudges her about her pregnancy, “Anakin is the father, isn’t he?”
Then the battle goes the same way it did in the previous version. The Republic forces led by Mace Windu land on the beach and Obi-Wan goes to fight Grievous. I'd like to amp up the troops' frustration with the Jedi commanders and generals. The conscripts have been sent to meat grinders due to the Jedi's inexperience in warfare. The Jedi Code forbade them to form attachments with troops. Combine all that with the revelation that it was the Jedi Master who ordered the creation of the Clone Army for the enemies. The troops perceive the Jedi are scheming to undermine Palpatine's rule and war efforts, so when Orde 66, they have no qualm about turning their blasters toward the Jedi.
Anakin goes to meet Palpatine to report that Obi-Wan found Grievous, and here, Palpatine at last reveals his identity as Darth Sidious. This goes the same way as the previous version did.
Anakin departs to meet Padme. Obi-Wan kills Grievous, and in his last breathes, Grievous tells Obi-Wan Palpatine is the Sith Lord. Obi-Wan reports to Windu and the other Masters about his discovery. Windu takes his Masters to Palpatine to arrest him.
Palpatine calls Padme to come over to his office so that he can discuss removing the governor system off from Alderaan. She takes the ship to Palpatine, just before Anakin finds her in the camp. She arrives at the office and finds Palpatine. We know this scene is terrifying because at this point we now know Palpatine is the Sith Lord and has baited Padme here. I am thinking about visualizing the mind state of someone being mind-tricked by the Sith--almost like the audience is being possessed. Going a full horror movie vibe. The door behind her closes automatically, and a gradual zoom toward Padme's expressions, as her surroundings darken.
Moments later, the Jedi team arrives to arrest Palpatine, with Padme nowhere to be found. The scene plays similarly to the previous version, with Palpatine trapping the Jedi in the dark side realm of sorts. Mace Windu slashes Palpatine in the darkness, and it is revealed that Padme was actually standing there and accidentally cut her down.
The rest of the scene plays the same, with Anakin arriving and finds the incapacitated Padme on the floor, thinking Windu was the one who did it. However, I think there should be more build-up to the notion that Anakin being convinced of the Jedi are trying to get to Padme, though I am not sure how to achieve that.
The next scenes proceed the same way. Anakin and the Dreadnought are ordered to go back to Coruscant to attack the Jedi Temple, Order 66 is issued, Obi-Wan gets rescued by the Wookiees and Yoda.
I have an idea about Padme being awakened in the medbay of the Star Dreadnought and mounts an escape via the speeder, and obviously, with the realization that Palaptine is the Sith, she goes to the Jedi Temple, where she witnesses the Jedi purge. Basically, replace Bail Organa with Padme. However, this idea is simply unfeasible considering the condition Padme is in... She is a pregnant woman with a lightsaber wound. So like the previous version, she stays unconscious in the medbay.
Yoda and Obi-Wan flee Kashyyyk with the starfighter, and get chased by the Star Destroyers. Bail Organa's Tantive ship arrives just in time to pick them up. Anakin is concerned with Padme and decides to bring her to Mustafar so that he can always protect her.
Obi-Wan, Yoda, and Bail discuss the aftermath of Order 66, and what their plan is going to be. They go back to Coruscant. Bail goes to the Senate to see Palpatine's purge of the opposition and the birth of the Empire. Obi-Wan and Yoda sneak into the Jedi Temple to signal all Jedi to hide and discover Anakin is the one who led the attack on the Jedi Temple.
From here, the story remains identical to the previous version. Obi-Wan goes to Mustafar and awakens Padme. Padme confronts Anakin about what he has done but passes out due to the injury. The duel ensues, and Obi-Wan defeats Anakin... etc. However, with Padme being the Alderaanian princess, she gets a proper massive funeral like she had in the movie.
Thoughts? I am currently stuck on how to get Anakin convinced of the belief that the Jedi will harm Padme. It is kind of lackluster as it is now.
I also had an idea of Bail asking Padme to assassinate Palpatine in the meeting on Alderaan, which gives her a more compelling reason to go to Kashyyyk. However, at his point of time, I don't think Bail would ask such a request.
So I'm planning on making an updated edition of my prequel trilogy rewrite with help from but I'm a bit stuck on Episode II so I'm just looking for some help and suggestions please.
Here's the original rewrite:
Here's a rewrite I saw online that I liked and I'm taking inspiration from:
https://www.reddit.com/r/fixingmovies/comments/1468xjc/the_phantom_menace_shouldve_been_about_the/
Long story short, in Episode I, General Grievous is a Khaleesi warrior hired by Gunray to lead the droid army in the Invasion of Naboo in exchange for aid to his people. Mars Vizsla is a Mandalorian and comrade of Grievous. During the battle against the Gungan army, Grievous is injured but escapes and Mars is captured.
After Episode I, the Republic judicial corps are expanded and transformed into a small peacekeeping force. The Jedi are unsure as to how they're meant to fight the much larger Separatist droid army but in reality, they're more for securing and defending Republic worlds and it's the clone army who will be doing most of the real fighting. Until it becomes public knowledge in Episode II, to prevent the Separatists from finding out, the clone army is kept secret by the Republic ministry of defence, not even the Jedi know.
Cloning facilities are built on a few different planets producing billions of clones. Each planet has a single clone donor hand picked by Palpatine (e.g. Jango) for reasons such as money or glory. Between Episode I and II, Mars is cloned without his consent so he's furious with the Republic and he escapes.
In Episode II, Mars has been organising terrorist attacks against the Republic. Anakin is escorting Padme to a pro-Separatist planet where Republic ambassadors are trying to negotiate with the Separatists to avoid war which gives us an opportunity to see that the Separatists aren't all evil.
Obi-Wan and Windu are investigating the attacks. Mars is planning a huge attack on Kamino where his clones are being grown. There, Kenobi and Windu learn about the clone army and its donors. Kenobi questions the morality of a clone army while Windu is suspicious of the clones as he realises, if the ministry of defence was able to hide a project that big, what else might they be hiding?
Alternatively, one idea I had (please let me know which one you prefer) is by the time Episode II starts, the title crawl explains that the Jedi and senate have been recently told about the clone army. The film begins with a meeting in Palpatine's office involves some debate over how to resolve the Separatist crisis and the ethics of using a clone army. What the Jedi aren't aware of until Kenobi and Windu arrive on Kamino is who the donors are, where the cloning planets are and the sheer size of the army.
When it comes to how Anakin's parents die my idea is that when Anakin lands on Tatooine, he's spotted by a vengeful Sebulba who follows him to their moisture farm (in Episode I Anakin is a teenager podracing for his family's freedom: himself, Shmi, Cleigg and Owen). Sebulba's loss in Episode I destroyed his career and reputation so be became the leader of a criminal gang. The family reunion is short lived as Sebulba's gang attacks with Shmi and Cleigg killed in the crossfire. An enraged Anakin kills the gang. Owen angrily blames Anakin for their parents deaths and tells him to never return. I'm not sure at what point does Anakin go to Tatooine, does he take a detour on his way to the negotiations planet with Padme? Alternatively could it work as a flashback, I'll say that on his way back from his first solo mission a few weeks ago Anakin stopped by Tatooine as it was nearby and he didn't tell Obi-Wan but he told Padme or Palpatine?
So to summarise, what I would like help with please:
Any suggestions please comment. When I post the updated version (likely on either this subreddit or r/fixingmovies) I'll make sure to credit you. Thank you.
P.S. for those wondering about the villains I haven't mentioned yet, Maul is the main villain of the trilogy and Dooku is a Jedi in Episode I who leaves the order out of disillusionment with the Republic and to find out how the Sith are manipulating the Separatists. I'm going to cut Ventress out my updated version as I don't think there's enough time for her.
Obi-Wan said it was a young Jedi named Darth Vader who turned evil and helped the Empire kill the Jedi. So would you have Anakin be young when he turns bad in your version as Obi-Wan described, or would you have him be a bit older than that?
In my version I’m thinking of having Anakin be either 25 or 28 when he turns to the Dark Side in my version of episode 3. I’m thinking of 25 because in my version of episode 1 Anakin is 15 when Obi-Wan first meets him, and I want Anakin and Obi-Wan to have been friends for at LEAST a decade before becoming enemies. I don’t know why it’s at least that amount of time I want, but it’s what I want. As for why I’m also thinking 28 instead, it’s because part of me also wants Anakin and Obi-Wan to be friends for 13 years like in the actual prequels. I don’t know why I partly want that, but I do.
Do you guys think 25 or 28 would be what some people consider “young” or should I change it? I honestly don’t want Anakin to be any younger than 15 when he’s first introduced in the prequels, but what do you all think?
I have been paying too much attention to the clone army and its implications for a long time. I have written about it several times before:
I highly recommend reading this post first, Attack of the Clones should have tied the Clone Army concept with Anakin's motivation to turn against the Jedi Council, so that the you can understand this post. I also got the response arguing against my original post, which makes some good points. This post, Clones should have had animosity toward the Jedi, not friendship, is also relevant in the topic I am discussing.
I struggled hard with Episode 2 REDONE in various ways to incorporate the Clone Army concept into the story. In retrospect, the entire Republic Clone Army concept was a mistake on Lucas' part in the first place.
First of all, we need to go back before the release of Attack of the Clones. When the original Star Wars came out, Leia's line, "General Kenobi, years ago you served my father in the Clone Wars", was a mystery nobody knew, even Lucas himself. It was a line George Lucas threw in because it sounded cool. The Empire Strikes Back came out and Lucas decided to write the "Episode V" text in the crawl, and that was when the concept of the prequels exploring Anakin Skywalker's past began to take shape, but even then, Lucas still couldn't figure out what the Clone Wars was going to be.
Everyone else just had to speculate what the Clone Wars was. Lucas did say that Palpatine was the "President" of the Republic and turned the Republic to the Empire, so the Expanded Universe writers depicted the clones as the antagonists against the Empire/Republic. All the signs were pointing in that direction: the Clone Wars was about the Republic versus the clones. After all, there are no clones left anymore by the time of the Original Trilogy, and the stormtroopers are all human volunteers and conscripts. Even up to The Phantom Menace, everyone assumed the Prequels were going to be all about this. Lucas kind of touched on it in the behind-the-scene documentary where he introduced the battle droids as "These guys are useless, so they were replaced by stormtroopers." Even Lucasfilm knew this and hyped this up in the marketing. The trailers for Attack of the Clones misled the audience into thinking that the clones were on the Separatist side and going to be the replacement of the battle droids.
Then the movie came out, and it is revealed the the clones were actually the Grand Army of the Republic. If you go to the threads and read fan reactions, they didn't like this direction because it was a massive retcon. The EU later explained this contradiction by saying the Empire eventually phased out the clones with the regular humans, but it was a retcon nevertheless, and the EU writers had to do a lot of dirty work to justify this sudden change.
Now that Attack of the Clones came out 22 years ago, we universally accept the clones were the Republic military ever since then. The "clones on the side of the Republic" concept has been established so firmly now that it is difficult to think outside this box. However, I'd like to rethink this fundamental element of the Prequel trilogy.
First, I'd like to point out the flaws in Attack of the Clones' political narrative:
At the beginning of Attack of the Clones, they say that the Republic had no military for a thousand years. While I get that the Republic is a more decentralized organization, not having a military force at all is just hard to swallow. Did they just only rely on the Jedi Knights for everything? Did they not have any major conflict? And everyone else was cool with the Republic not having a military?
Which makes it even more difficult to empathize with Padme's vehement opposition to simply creating a military. The story revolves around the Military Creation Act and treats it as a possible end of the Republic and democracy. Yes, that's how it worked out, but if you take the first half of Attack of the Clones in isolation, it is a major stretch.
The emergency powers just sort of blend as a background detail. This is the plot device Lucas added in to replicate the rise of historical dictatorships, yet we don't really feel the political crisis that would create a situation for Palpatine to get absolute powers. These political discussions feel separate from the actual story we are watching. Anakin has no opinion on the emergency powers. Obi-Wan has no opinion on it. Even the Jedi Masters seem ambivalent about it. Only Padme cares. Even then, it barely interworks with the actual ongoing storyline of Obi-Wan's investigation.
The Jedi are willingly okay with the Republic adopting the slave army. I can buy the Senate would accept the clone army, but the Jedi? Look, I know Yoda said the dark side is clouding their judgment, but I never knew it would also make them mentally inept. At no moment Obi-Wan tells the Council, “This assassin, who was the source for the mysterious Clone Army? That’s him standing next to Count Dooku up there. We have an army cloned from that Jango Fett hired by this dude named 'Tyrannus', a killer who was also hired to kill a senator, nevermind the army was also commissioned ten years ago by this Jedi who died misteriously, and funded by 'not the Republic'. Is this not enough of coincidences to figure that something is wrong with these clones? They were paid for waiting for the Jedi to take on Kamino, the one system not showing up in the Jedi archives. Only a Jedi could have access to erase them from the archives. Perhaps we should look into this Clone Army a little further if they are aligned with the enemy before marching right into war side by side with millions of them. Perhaps these clones were paid by the Sith. Maybe this entire war is fabricated.” There is no way the Jedi would play along and develop ties with the clones. The Jedi should be even way more cautious around the clones than they are about the droids, let alone leading them to the war.
And that isn't even considering the ethics of it. While it was understandable for Qui-Gon to let slavery go on Tatooine as it was out of their jurisdiction and they had a far more pressing matter to handle at that time, the Jedi Order having zero objection to leading a slave army is a different story. While the Expanded Universe in both Canon and Legends has touched upon this such as The Clone Wars TV series and the Republic Commando novel series, there has not been any scene of the Jedi challenging the ethics of leading the Clone Army in the trilogy. Either the Jedi were so institutionalized with the Republic that they were okay with using slaves born only to serve as disposable manpower or thought the clones were just programmable meat shields to fight the war, no different from the droids, and didn't think to examine the programming. Either option is awful.
Then how does that work into Anakin's character? There is no real reason for Anakin to hate the Separatists and be loyal to the Republic and Palpatine in the film. The only reason Anakin fought for the Republic side was that the Jedi Order was the Republic institution. The only thing we learn about Anakin's political view is "I don't think the system works". He shows his contempt for the Republic's system and the Jedi Code. So what is stopping him from becoming a Separatist or sympathizing with the Separatist cause? The film doesn't have an answer to that question.
A truly incoherent conspiracy about who created the Clone Army full of plot holes amounts to nothing with no payoff in this trilogy. Who is Sifo-Dyas and why the hell does he matter? We had this conspiracy about the production of the clone army, which was the main crux of Episode 2, and Episode 3 drops that thread unresolved because Lucas couldn’t figure out how to slot it in the film. It took 10 years and six seasons of an animated show to tell the audience who Sifo Dyas was.
These problems were all criticized since the film's release. However... let's flip which side the clones join. What if the clones were on the side of the Separatists? With this simple change, not only Attack of the Clones, but the Prequel Trilogy would have benefitted greatly.
Military Creation Conscription Act:
Instead of the Military Creation Act to counter the Separatist threat, what if it is the Military Conscription Act? Not just creating a standing army, but a full mobilization of troops, drafting people from the various systems. Now, suddenly, all those Padme and Bail's debates surrounding this Act make sense. We can understand the two sides of this issue, and why it is so hotly debated. Within the Republic, all the systems are autonomous and independent, but just how independent are they if their citizens can be forced into the central Republic government's military without their consent?
This also mirrors how Lucas intended the Clone Wars as the allegory to the Vietnam War. Lucas famously said he modeled the Emperor after Nixon and came up with the concept when Nixon pursued the third term. In Attack of the Clones, Palpatine's actions in AOTC mirror directly to the build-up to the US involvement in the Vietnam War. Both LBJ/Nixon and Palpatine were sneaky politicians who rose to power through controversial ways like deal-making, backroom intrigue, and management and started a deadly war for "democracy" via emergency powers, as well as the use of conscripts.
In response to these shocking revelations, it was declared by Sidious’ loyal Vice Chair, Mas Amedda, that, “this is a crisis. The senate must vote the chancellor emergency powers. He can then approve the creation of an army.” This is very similar to how the attack on the USS Maddox eventually led the U.S. government to draft the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution a few days later which declared that this country was, in terms of responding to North Vietnam’s actions, “prepared, as the President determines, to take all necessary steps, including the use of armed force...”
While not exactly the same, the ways that both the Galactic Republic and American government decided to quickly create legions of troops additionally share some characteristics.
With this military mindset exposed, it is truly of little wonder why many Americans like George Lucas would start to despise the draft due to not liking the idea of government officials, “lining us up for the butcher block.” In a very similar fashion, various clones such as Cut Lawquane would start to see themselves as individuals over the course of the Clone Wars and reach the conclusion that each of them was, **“just another expendable clone waiting for my turn to be slaughtered in a war
that made no sense to me.”** It is additionally intriguing to consider that, like how communism would eventually take over Vietnam by 1975 despite the ultimate sacrifices made by thousands of American soldiers, retired clones after the Clone Wars would later question, “the point of the whole thing. All those men died and for what?”
https://digitalcommons.calpoly.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1067&context=histsp
Making the issue around the emergency powers to be related to the conscription directly would make the parallels clearer.
It also ties more nicely with how the Imperial military worked in the OT. In the OT, the stormtroopers were human volunteers and conscripts. In the deleted scenes in A New Hope Biggs says he wants to join the Rebels to avoid being drafted into the Imperials. It makes more sense for the Imperial conscription system to be the continuation of the remnant of the Clone Wars, like how the US's WW2 conscription system continued up to 1973.
Obi-Wan's investigations into the Republic Separatist Clone Army:
In Episode 2, Obi-Wan does two different investigations on two different armies: He goes to Kamino and finds that the clones are being manufactured for the Republic. He then follows Jango to Geonosis and finds that the new droid army is being manufactured for the Separatists.
Not only is this messy in terms of the plot because the focus is everywhere (Obi-Wan has been looking into this mysterious army, and oh, he coincidentally bumps into another army), but the reason why we don't feel the Republic is in peril under the Separatist threat is that this powerful droid army in preparation for war is only mentioned in one or two lines:
Dooku: "Our friends in the Trade Federation have pledged their support. When their Battle Droids are combined with yours, we shall have an army greater than anything in the galaxy."
Obi-Wan: "The Trade Federation is to take delivery of a droid army here."
Obi-Wan's secondary discovery motivates the Senate to pass the emergency powers, but do you even remember the plot point of the Separatists making the new droid army in Attack of the Clones? I forgot because it was treated as such a trivial detail, even though it actually is the reason why the Republic made Palpatine a dictator.
Screenwriting Tip: If the story were to take half of its runtime to uncover the mysterious army, that army should be the villain's army, so that the audience would understand the stakes. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers didn't spend time boosting off how cool and awesome the Elven reinforcement for Rohan is. It showed off how amazing the Orc army is. It's Storytelling 101.
So let Obi-Wan's investigation play out in the same way until he goes to Kamino, finds the massive Clone Army, and talks to the Prime Minister. Let's change this one word.
Lama Su: "A clone army, and I must say, one of the finest we've ever created."
Obi-Wan: Tell me, Prime Minister, when my master first contacted you about the army, did--did he say who it was for?"
Lama Su: "Of course he did. This army is for the Republic Separatists."
He reveals this new Clone Army is the replacement of the Trade Federation's Droid Army.
Then the consequences change. The stakes are clear. Instead of Palpatine suddenly revealing he has some unknown clone army up to his sleeves to the Senate, if Obi-Wan's investigation into the Clone Army is for the Separatists, it would lead to the adoption of the emergency powers far more naturally. It also makes sense for Palpatine to use this revelation to fearmonger to the Senate.
In that way, not only do we unify these two separate investigations of two different armies into one more cohesive conspiracy, but we also see the politics interconnected to the overarching plotline. Obi-Wan's investigation feels more meaningful to the political backdrop because his discovery becomes a cause, and then effect (Military Conscription)--all building toward the villain's new military that can overwhelm the Republic. Now, we as the audience can understand why the Senate is panicking, and why the emergency powers and the Military Conscription Act need to pass.
It also makes sense of the movie's title, Attack of the Clones. In the movie, yeah, the clones do attack, but only describes one part of the story. If the whole movie is building up to the clone army being the villains, then the sinister title fits far better because "Attack of the Clones" becomes the overarching story.
Anakin's motivation to hate the Separatists and Dooku:
In light of the Separatist Clone Army--which is basically a slave army genetically bred only for war--how would Anakin react? Anakin was a slave, raised in the harsh reality of Tatooine. Being free of control is one of the important factors in his character arc, which is why he hated the Jedi Code. He wanted to be a Jedi to be free, but in some ways, he was still under the shackles.
In the film, he had no reaction to the clones fighting for the Republic. Attack of the Clones doesn't tie the existence of the Clone Army with Anakin's character development whatsoever. I remember one of the novelizations mentioning that Anakin despises the Separatists for their tolerance of slavery, and that serves as his driving motivation in the slave planet arc from The Clone Wars. The slaver queen does "no u" on Anakin being a slave to the Republic, but at no point does she point out his hypocrisy of commanding a slave army. And I know why the writers didn't have the characters mention the obvious elephant in the room. It's not because the writers forgot. It's because they ignored it.
Honestly, I feel one of the reasons why Anakin was separate from Obi-Wan's investigations is that if a former slave Anakin got to Kamino and saw the growth of human beings for the purpose of inducted into a slave army loyal to the Republic, comissioned by the Jedi Council member, under no condition Anakin would have been able to still be loyal to the Jedi, the Republic, and Palpatine at that moment. I mean, yes, in the next film he eventually has a fallout with the Jedi, but not because of the clones. The clones absolutely do not factor into his motivation.
The films never delve into the ethics of the clones at any point. The moment they do that, it shatters Anakin's motivation to join Palpatine. After all, Chancellor Palpatine was ultimately the one who authorized the use of the Clone Army for the Republic, so Anakin should resent him just as much as the Jedi. If Anakin were to be friendly with Palpatine, it has to pull the brain out of Anakin's head, which the film did instead of actually finding a thematic solution to this problem.
However, if the Separatists were the ones using the clones, this would give Anakin a motive to be loyal to the Republic and Palpatine and be against the Separatists. He already hated the Jedi for stopping him from visiting and freeing his enslaved mother on Tatooine. This new revelation would have given him a sense of direction in life, viewing the war as a crusade against the very same injustice he suffered from. He would be an active participant in the war, as Revenge of the Sith depicted him.
And like Anakin, it also might fool the audience into thinking Palpatine is a good guy. Obviously, a large part of the audience knew that Palpatine was Sidious, but many didn't. And the newcomers who watch Star Wars in chronological order wouldn't. The problem is that the film already paints Palpatine as an obvious bad guy from the beginning and when the twist hits in Revenge of the Sith, it comes across as nothing. If the films fooled the audience into supporting Palpatine, then that twist would have hit hard.
Sifo-Dyas the Traitor?:
Now, the whole Sifo-Dyas conspiracy becomes compelling in this context. What would happen if the Senate and the populous learned that it was the Jedi who ordered the creation of the Separatist Clone Army? Not just some Jedi, but a member of the Jedi Council. That's the highest it can get.
This would be a PR nightmare for the Jedi, eroding their standing in the Republic as an institution. The Jedi would be questioned, hated, and slandered as the Separatist sympathizers from the public. This would create major friction between Anakin and the Council, questioning his Jedi beliefs: what kind of Jedi claiming to be the guardians of peace and justice in the galaxy create such a slave army for the enemies?
Instead of Jar Jar coming out to voice his support for the emergency powers in the Senate, imagine it's Mace Windu brought to the Senate, being questioned about his allegiance, and having no choice but to support Palpatine's emergency powers to avoid the Jedi Order being branded as traitors in light of the Clone Army scandal. The Jedi Order would essentially be forced into supporting Palpatine's rise to power, which gives a good reason why the Jedi were so politically ineffective.
And then let's change one of the ending scenes, where Dooku comes to Coruscant and meets Sidious. Instead of Dooku simply saying the war has begun, he reveals to the audience that he is the one who ordered the creation of the Separatist Clone Army during his tenure as a Jedi Master a decade ago. He killed Sifo-Dyas and pretended to be him to contact the Kamioan cloners. It's all by Sidious's design. With this, the audience gets an answer to the mystery, and all the set-ups get proper pay-offs.
Why would they follow Order 66?:
By now, you might question, if the Republic troopers are non-clone conscripts, why would they be willing to follow Order 66? Although the current Canon says it's the biochip activating the unwilling clones to eliminate the Jedi, in the Legend days, Order 66 was merely one of the known emergency protocols.
Honestly, if Revenge of the Sith played up a notion of how normal people are able to commit such an atrocity like genociding the Jedi for Palpatine, this would give some interesting implications about the sheep mentality as seen in historical fascist dictatorships. Maybe Revenge of the Sith could focus on Palpatine's cult of personality in society throughout the war so that soldiers would be able to follow Palpatine's orders. Maybe throughout the movie, Palpatine appoints his loyalists in the ranks of the military and then propagandizes against the Jedi, saying that they are scheming to undermine his rule and war efforts.
This aspect is lightly touched on by one of the arcs from The Clone Wars, where Tarkin staunchly opposes the Jedi Order's role as leaders in the Grand Army of the Republic, believing that peacekeepers should not direct the Republic's war effort. And there is some truth to it. Compounded on the Republic soldiers' frustration toward the Jedi's tactics, it doesn't make much sense for the Republic soldiers to be coddling the Jedi in the same way the WW2 soldiers cheered for their Generals.
The Jedi are not graduates of the military academies; as Mace said, "We are keepers of the peace, not soldiers." He was correct. The Ruusan Reformation removed Jedi from military command and duties about a thousand years prior to the Clone Wars, keeping them away from military duties for millennia. No experience in warfare; some actual children who are suddenly in command of squads of clones. Even then, they didn't just lead small strike teams or outright act as their own independent units as part of the professional military. They were like the Shaolin monks conducting galactic-wide military operations.
There are multiple instances in the films, show, and the EU materials where the Jedi employ questionable tactics, like just straight up charging enemy fortifications and deflecting blaster bolts with their sabers as the thousands of clones get cut down--literally the American Civil War tactics with the sci-fi weaponry. Half of the Republic Commandos were KIA in the first battle of Geonosis because they marched them into meat grinders and got a lot killed unnecessarily. They have limited training in leading military actions and tend to plan based on what they are capable of, not what would be the best decision based on the abilities of the soldiers under them. The Jedi also wouldn't need to evolve into better tacticians because they had an expendable resource, as well as Sidious guaranteeing favorable outcomes. After all, the Jedi Code forbade them to form attachments. Combine all that with the revelation that it was the Jedi Master who ordered the creation of the Clone Army for the enemies... This would result in a lot of Republic soldiers resenting the Jedi--again, all by Sidious's design.
The politicization of the military would explain why this non-clone Republic soldier would have no qualms about turning against the Jedi once Order 66 drops. Show Palpatine expanding the military's political influence in the Republic throughout the war, making them his bulwark for his coup gradually. This mirrors a lot of military coups in history and explains the status quo of the Galactic Empire in the OT, in which the Empire is basically a military dictatorship with the Moff and Governor system and Tarkin being in charge of the governance. The historical and systemic developments give a lot of storytelling potential; way more interesting than a retcon like an inhibitor chip suddenly activating the soldiers to turn on the Jedi.
Obviously, if the Republic adopted the conscript forces comprised of humans and the Separatists used the Clone Army, then the Republic forces would equip the movie's Clone Trooper armors, and the Separatist clone troopers would equip a different design. Maybe the Republic troopers would look more like Phase 2 clone troopers and the Separatist clone troopers would look like the Phase 1 clone troopers with the more Mandalorian flairs.
I'm not sure if this is something I want to make a change to my Episode 2 REDONE. It is just one of the many possibilities I have been pondering, but as I ponder more and more, this is the only solution that makes sense. However, I would like to hear your thoughts on this matter.
What surprises do you throw into your pt rewrite which cast the ot in a different light?
Reduce each trio of trilogies to a single sentence: what happens and why should anyone care?
I’m assuming that the OT must be accepted as-is, while you are free to completely reimagine the PT and ST.
I’m trying to do several things with this little exercise. First, it forces one to get to the heart of the story, without getting distracted with the plot. Second, it forces one to sketch an actual progression that should have an actual point. Finally, it’s short enough that people will read it.
Here’s my attempt:
Any rewrite that could avoid including the character of Padme would likely be trying too hard to be different.
Boiled down to the absolute essence, Pasme needs to bear Anakin’s twins and then die. Certain plot threads leap out, young love and loss being the most obvious. The fact that Leia believes Organa to be her father certainly leaves ample room for Padme being Organa’s real daughter. And that conveniently ties into the political drama that the prequels naturally suggest.
So, where have you taken this character?
Personally, I’m against making her Force sensitive, at least to the extent that she’s an Organa. The fire has gone out of the Jedi by the time of the OT, and no one believes that were even genuine, but turn the page back a generation and you can’t overturn a rock without having Force freaks crawl out by the dozen, at least the way most people go about rewriting the PT.
In the interest of dramatic efficiency, Padme needs to play a key role in Anakin’s fall. And that’s really the central issue of the prequels. But I’ve never seen a story that felt psychologically convincing. He’s angry. He’s afraid. Boo hoo. Apart from Palpatine, everyone begs him not to head down that path. He persists, ultimately bringing ruin upon himself, his family and friends, the Jedi, and the Republic. He’s the most consequential person in the history of that galaxy, far, far away. And then he’s redeemed with a single virtuous act. I don’t buy it. Anakin needs more. And I think I’ve hit upon a solution.
My Padme is not all sweetness and light. She’s Lady Macbeth. She pushes the interests of the Organa family against the Palpatines. She pushes Anakin to harness the powers of the dark side, both to gain the upper hand over the Clone Empire, and to further his own rise. She plays a dangerous game, and ultimately loses to Sheeve. Anakin loves her dearly to the end, and remains ignorant of his children and the role that Sheev played in her death. In fact, it’s the promise of a dark-side resurrection that keeps Anakin bound to Palpatine, even if Anakin is the stronger…
Apart from Obi Wan, everyone and everything pushes my Anakin, despite his misgivings, to follow the quicker, darker path, his wife first and foremost. And if once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.
My Padme will be ambitious, strong-willed, manipulative, ruthless, and intelligent. Her hard-nosed view of the ongoing Clone Wars ultimately triumphs over Anakin’s notions of an idealistic crusade. And as much as I loathe prophecies, the original Macbeth revolves around them. And the PT includes two characters with the gift of foresight: Yoda and Palpatine. Palpatine, in particular, offers some delicious possibilities.
And that’s all I have to say about that. For the moment.
Here are two passages that feel fraught with meaning, but are never explained:
It's like something out of a dream or… This place gives me the creeps. Still there's something familiar about this place. I don't know I feel like…
There's something not right here. I feel cold… death. — That place is strong with the dark side of the Force. A domain of evil it is. In you must go. — What's in there? — Only what you take with you.
Watch Yoda when Luke goes into the cave. He’s deep in concentration. So much of what transpires on Dagobah seems like some next-level Jedi mind trick.
I have… nothing here. But Yoda is a major reason for why ESB pushed Star Wars to another level. As viewers, we find the mystery compelling. Still, Lucas needed to confront this mystery in his prequels, deepening it, illuminating it, or at least continuing it. But he didn’t.
What do you think is going on? How do you tackle it on your prequel rewrites?
I thought I’d make a few posts about various issues in the OT that have no obvious solution, at least to my mind. To kick it off…
Why do neither Vader nor the Emperor ever mention Yoda? He taught Obi Wan, who in turn was the master of Anakin; his existence could hardly have been a secret. And yet the assumption is that Obi Wan taught Luke, with never a thought to Yoda.
To make matters more mysterious, both the Emperor and Vader can feel the disturbance in the Force created by Luke’s awakening. Why not that of Yoda? Come to think of it, why couldn’t Obi Wan be felt well before that?
My PT currently has Yoda and Obi Wan faking their deaths. I suppose I could spin a theory that a padawan grows increasingly luminous with the Force as he advances in his training, only to learn to shield his presence once he becomes a confirmed Jedi. But it feels clunky. Anyone manage this better?
When Obi Wan spoke this line in the original trilogy, how did you interpret it?
What sort of piloting is your interpretation of prequel Anakin getting up to?