Why was this sub reddit created and how is it so dead?

Hello,

I recently managed to escape the Red Pill Ideology.
In the process of doing so, I gained an understanding of how and why it works so well.
The primary reason for its success, appears to be how it capitalizes on hurt caused to men and the sad part is, that it advocates for men to do the same to women for no reason.
Instead of trying to heal and help, it tries to spread hate and push men towards their abyss.
For influencers this seems to be an incredible viable way to market products and services.
This pisses me off and I am currently looking to design systems which counter the red pill.
If anyone has ideas on how this could be approached, I would be really thankful.

It's gone private, and I can't find any information about why or for how long.

This is probably overdue, but I think the purpose of this sub has been fulfilled. In the time since the creation of /r/PunchingMorpheus, other subs, with more clear purposes (and better names), have been created and risen to prominence. /r/incels has been banned /r/TheRedPill has been quarantined, and while their denizens have simply scattered to other subs and other platforms, there is a much stronger presence for compassionate relationships and equitable gender relations on Reddit and elsewhere now than there was when this sub was first created.

I believe that /r/PunchingMorpheus has done what it set out to do. It was a good stopgap for a little while, while other subs got up off the ground and other people and groups picked up the cause of flipping the table on the unfair games we are pressured to play with love and attraction.

I wanted to thank everyone who contributed here, and encourage you to visit other subreddits with a more active community. I want to particularly recommend /r/MensLib, which has our esteemed /u/BigAngryDinosaur as a moderator. I've been a member there for a few months now, and I think it does what this sub set out to do quite effectively. It has a more active moderation team and a bigger userbase than this one ever did, as well.

Please feel free to suggest other subreddits here in the comments of this thread, as well. I won't try to archive this sub or make it private. If for some reason you find that /r/MensLib and any other subs that are mentioned here won't satisfy, you're still free to post here.

Thanks, everybody. It's been great watching this topic and cause evolve, and I feel honored to have been a part of the conversation, even if only for a short time.

Cheers, everyone. Let's all continue to grow together, in wisdom and in love.

I use the term ambivert because introvert and extrovert are absolutes and I'd describe myself as a 4 if 1 is introverted, 5 is ambiverted, and 10 is extroverted.

ANYWAYS. I have managed social anxiety for 8 years and recently began the uphill battle of beating it- fun experience and heavily suggest anyone in a similar situation to start now, I'm more than happy to share about this if anyone wants to PM me. My personality thrives when it comes to meaningful relationships, but that's not why I'm here. My personality struggles when it comes to initial approaches on women.

Currently, I am working my way up the fear hierarchy. For example, gaining exposure complimenting attractive women, making a point for eye contact...stuff I ignored in the past. Also, I would have been embarrassed to share this a few weeks ago, but there's no shame in admitting you are part of the 99% who don't have the courage to simply walk up to a girl you see and think "wow, she's pretty." I've had relationships, but never where I saw a woman randomly, approached her without knowing a thing about her, and then going on a date.

What have my fellow people who struggle with cold approaches done in order to push through their natural shyness? I know I am on the right track to overcome my obstacles, but I enjoy hearing from others and learning from their experiences, especially those who have similar personality types.

Cheers :)

I just wanna say that I posted here once and got a great response by one of the regulars here. The respect, non-toxicity and clear wisdom of that post was on of the rare times an internetpost truly went to my heart and I think that it change me for the better. While I never claimed to be part of the redpill circlejerk, I had certainly become nihilistic and redpillistic in my outlook on the datingmarket. However, as the post highlighted, it drained my lifeenergy over time and I became increasingly tired of "playing", proving myself to be some "alpha", and breaking hearts. I thought it didnt matter becuase I was cheated on by my first love ruthlessy and I thought that was just how the game was played, but I know better now. Slights and evils against oneself is simply not a reason to do them to others, even if that is how it often works. I wish I remembered which alt account I posted here in so I could thank that writer in person, I think it was the creator of the sub?

After I changed my philosophy/outlook on life I shortly after met a girl who destroyed the concept of AWALT and opened up my heart again. A girl who truly loves me for I am.

I will never completely throw away the redpill, it simply has some truths to it, becuase the dating market IS partly nihilistic and frankly, economically brutal. But so is life, and living by that philosophy is a choice, not the ultimate answer. A choice who will break everyone who is not a sociopath down, slowly.

I could write longer but I gtg. Whoever you were, thank you! I just want you to know even if this sub is dead and the red/blue cultural war is relatively dead, you took part in changing one person for the better.

Sorting by 'new', the last post was about 100 days ago, and before that, 150, then 199. I get that feeling when someone deleted you on Facebook, you don't even notice when their posts don't appear on your front page and then you suddenly remember and notive they've disappeared.

Sorry if this isn't quite the right place for this..

Reddit truly has a sub for everything.

Anyways, it's a great relief to see that there are still people here on reddit with a sense of sanity intact concerning the destructive and nonsensical philosophy of TRP and its sub groups. I wish the sub was more active.I'll be reading up on the top posts for points against TRP's bs philosophy, the cycle of hate must end and that we must reach an understanding. Now that I think about, TRP is absolute in its stance, disregarding the complexity of the human condition y'know?

sSadly, the kind of people who would deliberately find a "women's space" or a "men's space"-- on a cyber-location that often has poorly-moderated circlejerk groups-- are probably actually coming here specifically to engage in groupthink.

Gendered culture is the number one form of groupthink in any and all cultures (in the sense that it creates the largest divide between the most numerous populations: women and men).

So, all that means is that a place like Reddit will be a breeding ground for that large divide to reconstitute itself, in public and in a place of relative anonymity, bringing out the worst in people.

#TRP is much larger, and is therefore the prominent, pre-eminent aggressor.

However, they believe this is justified by their idea of a "feminist culture". They believe pop culture is an aggressive misandrist, and are reacting to that-- this is basic Neoreactionary politics, even though they will often claim to be apolitical (which is basically crypto-political or just plain self-naivete).

#In defense of TBP: It's smaller, and it's still reactive to Neoreactionaries, but I believe it's simply flabberghasted that anyone would believe TRP is helpful or healthy.

You can still Punch Morpheus (reject the dualism), even if you're willing to decide which side is being genuinely more horrible and creating a power imbalance-- and I think it's the masculine side of the gender power dynamic in most developed nations.

Both sides are breeding grounds for abuse, but critical (not just reconciliatory) focus needs to be placed on culture in general to explain why women and men are both displeased with how many men resort to violence against themselves, other men and other women.

Punching Morpheus does not mean ignoring systemic causes of the gendered divide. Morpheus wouldn't need to be punched-- or would be relegated to being a laughing stock of history-- if the systemic issues of gendered culture were alleviated.

#tl;dr Circlejerks breed aggression, but Kumbayas can breed complacency if both sides are falsely equalized.

This is the top post at TRP today. As of now, there are 681 upvotes and 281 comments.
I did a little background work and this is what I found. Many of the accounts that were captured by this 'infiltrator' have been deleted or are new accounts.

There are death and rape threats, along with threats to their children, being sent to the members of this group, causing the page admin to post:
Please make sure you are messaging and commenting on the right group. This is a page and not the one where we are encouraging cheating. That's disgusting to me.

Disclaimer: I am not saying that TRP is responsible for the trolling. They just have this post as the top comment and pretty terrible things to say about military women and that AWALT.
Sluts gonna slut, I suppose, as one subscriber put it. /s

I met a girl back in January in my English 1310 class. I have a "hero complex" so I can sense when people are emotionally hurting and always want to help. I initially intended to befriend her only but slowly developed feelings for her as we chatted. These feelings escalated into me asking her out and being flaked on twice...but I didn't take the hint and kept having feelings for her, even resorting to old tricks of attempting to build myself up as more competent that I am with these sorts of things. A few weeks ago I found out through her drunkenly telling me that she was a girl who has lots of sex. She's slept with 20 guys and 2 girls. I eagerly asked her if we could, she sent nudes and seemed to be ok with it initially, but seemed more and more emotionally unavailable as we went along. Until we fought viciously last Saturday after I asked her why she seemed emotionally unavailable and told her she was about to lose me. She responded bitterly, told me she'd never have sex with me, told me I'm not the irst one who has said this, complained about how she's so busy she has no time for friends, then told me to not talk to her again. I just lost any grip on my normally kind self I have. I called her a cunt, belittled her social circle and how dysfunctional it seems and told her she makes me feel better about how inept I am socially. Looking back, I was trying to use the old RP trick of dread to try to make her "change". I'm actually very upset at myself for letting this occur.

The fact that i let myself go back to my old ways from 2-3 years ago is unnerving. Yes, i had almost all my romantic relationships and sexual activity when I subscribed to RP philosophy, but I also had virtually no friends outside of my best friend and internet buddies and a dearth of psychological issues. The girl who brought all of these issues out seems to have a lot of the same things in common with the partners I had when i was kinda an RPer. Parental issues, emotional unavaliability to hide just how hurt they are...I have a few of these issues too and its actually easy for me to see in others.

I would have never suspected I'd fall back into my old traps. One of my big character traits to outsiders is just how innocent and big hearted I am. most people I've told about what I've done have a hard time believing it. Sweet feminist SmytheOrdo who almost always puts others' feelings before his own was an ass to a girl he was into? No way. Goodness i've undermined myself.

But I've already taken steps to get better. Yesterday I tried talking to that girl again, and she told me we can no longer be friends. I understood and wished her nothing but good things, then deleted her number.(Seeing her in person is another story, I'm actually terrified about that.) I went to a concert Wednesday before we talked again and I felt in a good place socially again for the first time in months. I was surrounded by loud music, punks, goths, I flirted with a few even, and felt such an inner peace being around people like me. I want to feel that peace all the time. I want to try to go to more concerts, try to pursue my hobbies of music and skateboarding more, and just get back to the good life in general. However I feel I'm missing several things socially. The reason I'm reaching out to this sub is because I want to instill good habits for the future again.

https://www.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/4bw1du/red_pills_awalt_comes_from_fpua_books_like_why/

The ideas in the pill subs extend past there to, I found out today, commonplace dating advice to Millennial women. It started with stuff like Sex and the City and The Rules. I've just made a post on Why Men Love Bitches., above. edit: there is an obscene no. of women from UK giving this book a thumbs up…)

I hate using this term, but, I'm actually finding all this talk about manipulative women triggering

The idea of a woman being attracted to me, not to mention loving me, is such a bizarre thought. Like it just genuinely feels impossible. I'm not ugly but I just feel like attracting women these days is impossible, purely because I'm not Chad. Like I think I'm just a permanently unloveable and unattractive person to all women, and none will ever want to be around me. How do you escape this mindset?

Recent thread on main relationships sub where wife is complaining that hubby doesn't do enough. Description says he is gov.t agent, works 40 hours, earns 6 figures, they live in Silicon Valley, have family house and kids the whole shebang and all by 30...but she's unhappg eith his ambitions? What gives?

The Blue Pill is doing everything in its power to prevent men having a 'sexual strategy', not just The Red Pill, but literally any advice from any source that it disapproves of.

It says things like 'thinking you have to go to the gym all the time is toxic masculinity' but it's constantly hating on fat neck beards. One Bper recently put forward a post suggesting that It makes sense that women in online dating will not only reject but be cruel and impolite to an unattractive guy, if an attractive man rejects him. Reverse the genders on this and it's bigotry.

They say that 'thinking you can never be vulnerable is toxic masculinity' but they are always always calling unattractive men whiney self-pitying butthurt man children.

They explicit mock any man who uses PUA books or sites as an insecure man-child. They can't conceive that some guys would struggle to flirt or read a woman's intentions. If you don't get basic social skills, that's on you and you're screwed for it, a loser. They either mock you relentlessly, or start acting condescending towards you like a child.

If you struggle to find companionship, then they act all haughty and say that you're probably a creep who deserves to be alone in the first place.

They don't bother providing any alternatives, say they are purely for satire, and they are ridiculously smug and proud of that fact. Hence why we come here.

They have actually put me off using self improvement books except the ones they approve of. They recently reviewed No More Mr Nice Guy and it was not pleasant. They basically said that it's a very common sense self-help book for losers which terps masturbate to.

I am getting sick of both pill subs. I just get stressed looking at them and all this anger and laughing at the problems of others. Blue is biased towards women, red biased towards men. Why is there this desperate attempt for one side to claim power? Why do relationships have to be about power?

Seeking advice from those 23+ who have found LTRs with people they like after college.

So I'm actually gonna make a thread with a LEGIT SINCERE GENUINE question and not just drunken ranting like my last one (granted I am still drunk but coherent at least.)

How do you actually meet girls after you graduate school?

Because I feel like these days, graduating without a college or HS sweetheart is basically a sexual death sentence if you're male and not Chad. As in, you cannot meet people that you share a common interest with and are assured to either die alone or become the beta bux.

Until I find an answer to this question, I will assume that self improvement of all types (mental, physical etc.) are all just massive scams and copes. If I find an answer I will start improving my life I just want evidence that it's not all for naught. I don't want to sacrifice effort just to be as lonely as I've ever been or even worse, beta bucks.

According to TRP the only men who even need to reproduce are the glorified 'Chads' or 'Alphas'. This because they have the highest quality genetics which is good for our offspring and by extension, the human race. If it is true that the 'beta provider' is therefore useless bar for his protection, provision and affection towards his partner, and quite literally a secondary option, then a man who is incapacitated from this role is easily disposable by her (Briffault's Law). There are umerous posts about this issue: Relational Equity, Hypergamy, Vulnerability, the series on 'Love', she is not your shoulder to cry on, the aforementioned Briffault's Law, etc. I see various posts and research wrt. wives staying with their sick husbands, but I can't see why anyone would do this when younger. It is totally irrational for someone young to stay tied down to someone who is struggling when they have more options, whether or not I agree that it is shallow and selfish (which I do, yet it could easily become an unhappy, unfulfilling or even toxic relationship for the carer if they cannot leave. Sometimes we have to abandon those we care for for our own good…this applies more to abuse than poor health of course, but occasionally applies to the latter) Basically, I see little security in the event of a crisis in a relationship before marriage-and even then…now, I'm not sure whether this'd be gender neutral, I'm certainly not saying AWALT. However, I am wondering whether men would be more likely to stay, and obliged to stay, were the scenarios reversed (code of male honour, burden of performance etc.)

(Sorry that this idea is still very wooly in my mind, may tighten it up for clarity later. Just started to bug me when I was out and about today)

Second criticism: I am currently annoyed because there's a TBP thread about how 'SMV' is bullshit. A guy comes in and says that while he disagrees with objectifying women specifically, social market value is a very real thing. People are collectively and primarily valued according to their socioeconomic status and achievements, their output and extrinsic value to society (primarily through their employment occupation), whether we like it or not or subscribe to it on a personal level. A BPer came in saying "value is constant and unchangeable [sic] everyone is equal and worthwhile […]" This was used as an argument for why RP is bad to quantify people in terms of SMV.

The day before that I read a thread on "why women are kept out of engineering and other traditionally male jobs." It's full of women (rightfully) complaining about being overlooked by their fathers, prospective employers etc. for certain professions in favour of their less skilled, less qualified, less intelligent brothers or male peers/rivals. Clearly this is sexism, discrimination due to gender. However, the language used to describe these less competent men is quite frank; "losers". This might be right, in that the men are failing to satisfy societal expectations of success, especially the male gender role (how ironic)...but it definitely contradicts "everyone is equal" and "value is constant and unchangeable." Indeed, it's actually in favour of 'social market value' a la meritocracy, because the women are saying that they should have been chosen for the job based on merit, not of gender. This is a step towards progress, but far far away from "everyone is a unique valuable special snowflake with equal worth" territory. This lends me to believe that TBP is here being intellectually dishonest.

Link https://www.reddit.com/r/TheBluePill/comments/48oj9e/so_lets_talk_about_the_bestcase_scenario_for_the/d0o4xf2?context=3

I have tried asking this question numerous times on other subs with multiple alts and it keeps getting removed. No one is available or willing to give an explanation for the concept: women seem to have an 'easier' time in the 'SMP', particularly online dating.

I recently saw a post over on the Tinder sub which was basically a young woman telling the men there how to act and behave. "If you do this, I will left swipe you", "If you don't do this, you're getting nexted." On and on. I didn't learn anything about the OP, except her high standards. But it was massively upvoted. On my Facebook feed, I have random threads pop up for ads which say inflammatory things like, "Finally, a new app brings some hope for young women! Because we're sick of swiping left." On various articles, I see complaints such as "there aren't enough college educated men these days, which hurts women (because we're left with losers")-but even in places like Silicon Valley, there's a new complaint; "these guys running a startup just aren't attractive enough. They're too awkward or ugly."

10 seconds OK at 19:00 PM GMT, I Googled 'why does the dating market favour women' and what was the first article whcih came up? [Why the Dating Scene Favors Men, from Business Insider] (http://uk.businessinsider.com/why-the-dating-scene-favors-men-2015-9?r=US&IR=T) Their conclusion was: Leave New York, go to Silicon Valley where there might be someone up to scratch.

To me, this seems to be the pip of truth in RP, whatever poison you may afterwards make of the heuristics...and it's frustrating that every sub outside of PPD will auto-remove such questions. It's not like I am oblivious to women's struggles in the dating market; I quite frequently browse the subs which document women being harassed online. But I don't understand why the 'issue' (because I suppose it is just a first world problem) keeps getting swept under the rug.

Following my ban from my last online anon abode, I set up residence in PurplePillDebate. I prayed at the Church of Rollo Tomassi, and this seemed to be the basic theme; people are objects in the game of sexual strategy, man and woman alike.

I'm yet to meet a therapist who can convince me against "If my SMV is 5 and my girlfriend's SMV is 7, it is likely that she will cheat on me with an SMV8 guy in the next 12 weeks" or other basic arguments. At the same time the reduction to being a unit of sexual market value or categorised as Alpha, Beta, Omega, Incel-and within them, the (not 100% accurate) hierarchy of Chad/Alpha Fucks, Apex Alpha, Alpha Bucks, raw Alpha, Beta Fucks, Beta Bucks, Beta Orbiter, Omega Orbiter, Omega Incel…it was, well, a very dehumanising experience.

But apparently, RP is far from alone in that world view…check out the list of 'most right swiped jobs' for Tinder. It seems to all be about LMS.

It's absolutely spurred me on to hit the gym and watch what I eat more, but…ummm..I don't get out of the house much to socialise either. Which isn't TRP's fault, but I do feel that the Hypergamy boogeyman has just dissuaded me from trying to fix my social anxiety-a problem which I sense pre-existed my subscription to the Manosphere, and probably precipitated it.

I had to leave PurplePillDebate for a few weeks to stop feeding my turns-out-I'm-autistic mind's very rigid and systemic way of viewing the world. As with most of my previous special interests, I have become a master of RP theory, but actual practice in the so-called SMP? De nada, lol. Even when I get matches on Tinder

And I am still, a freaking 18 months after breaking up and 6 months after last contact, not 100% over my ex. sigh I was 'triggered' a few days ago by thinking I saw her in the supermarket, carrying a pram…I feared the worst, yet was happy. Bittersweet.

I've found PPD an interesting experiment. It taught me things about myself through trying to empathise with both pill's perspectives. I've come to the conclusion that I have co-dependency issues, a fear of abandonment, possibly some entitlement, and I'm subtly incredibly egocentric/egotistical; a covert/vulnerable narcissist I believe it's called? It's likely a bi-product of my anxiety, and being on the spectrum (theory of mind issues). Occasionally I have found myself making threads as much to leech out some form of validation supply as I did a cry for help. I wanted to teach, which was noble, but I also wanted to hear the sound of my own voice. To be fair, I am astounded by how many "charismatic" people in the 'sphere have that same tendency, and indeed how many people over on the forum have a debating style which is more talking at, than to (both pills alike).

(Don't get me wrong, I am very fond of most if not all of the faces over there, regardless of what they think of me. But I have picked up on their own little quirks and idiosyncrasies, their core values, their personal gripes and blind spots. It's rare that people open up to you like that in real life. The danger is that I start to view them, as warned in the title, as guinea pigs, science experiments to observe dispassionately-rather than the human beings they are. I suppose that's a major reason that women are sickened by TRP.)

As an example of why I think I have narcissistic traits (no psych. will diagnose me as NPD, of course); on the way home from the gym today I began to wonder: what if these rationalisations, this depressing hypothesis appeals to me as the reason for the breakdown of our relationship...because it puts me at the centre of attention? What if my ex's guy friend who I was obsessively envious of…actually did get dumped or cheated on? What if, at my birthday party, she was just trying to cheer him up? What if she was just telling the truth about having to break up due to religious and cultural differences? That would imply that the world doesn't revolve around me. And at the same time, it would liberate me, because at the time, I was enough for her. There was nothing wrong with me, despite my neuroticism about not having low enough body fat. She meant it when, that lunch break in the lecture halls after we had 'broken up' but unofficially still hanging…that she meant it, when she said I was hot, and she had "thought you were hot since the first day I laid eyes on you." What if "you can sire a thousand of my daughters" on my wonderful birthday was indeed her quirky little way of saying "please oh god fuck me now?"

But that would also later condemn me…because it would just confirm my egotism, my vanity, and worst of all, mean I have a history of mild emotional abuse (false accusations of cheating), and cope with my anxiety and obsessive streak through controlling behaviour. I've seen that play out living with my dad these past few months; not too long ago we were in screaming matches every night, until I had my way with small things.

I wonder how many people, man and women, attracted to RP have similar dysfunctions...

Quick backstory

I'm 20 years old haven't been in a serious relationship for a few years. Previous relationship barely lasted 2 weeks, last serious relationship lasted for 4 months back in 2011.

Now the present

Learning "pickup" back in high school really messed up my brain when it came on to relationships, my game is alright but when things start getting serious I don't know how to proceed anymore. Now I have a girl that loves me and I fcking love her but man it's hard to stop trying to constantly fix things and it's driving us both crazy.

Now I wrote down my inhibiting factors and I'd like you guys to help me with them because I can't lose this girl at all.

I think I'm subconsciously trying to change her. I'm doubting my ability to make her happy. Doubting that I'm a match for her. I'm afraid to get seriously heartbroken. I'm afraid she'll leave me for someone else. ( I think this definitely stems from pickup smh) I'm afraid the relationship will fail. I've suppressed my feelings for so long I feel numb to certain emotions sometimes.

I really want to get these out the way and take the plunge cause I really love this girl but unless I get these sorted out I'll destroy us.

Sighs I'm in a relationship and before everything was fine but the more we got to know each other the more doubts and fears we had as feelings intensified. I've been reading an article which I'll link at the bottom of this post.

I'm wondering how can I deal with these fears and doubts in an healthy way?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/compassion-matters/201401/7-reasons-most-people-are-afraid-love