Like debu sitting alone in the room dressing up and like the line " stuck in a man's body" hit way too close to home

1. Been a very very good student till date and never got low grades.
2. Been in a very intimate serious relationship with a girl (wlw) for 2 years and brokeup

After breaking up, the bodily stress Idk what to name it, something is eating my brain up , craving for the intimacy , for the touch , for the warmth. Cant concentrate on anything and even a small bit of something is giving me spine chills. How to get diverted or what can I do to be ok or normal ig ?

I am trying to concentrate on studies and going for a run and all but still unable to get diverted from that urges..

21 lesbian and my mom had this girl talk w me about how I'm gonna work for a couple years and then I can get married and have kids and i kind of just sat there unresponsive until she left. i can't even bring myself to cry because i'm numb to this kind of pressure now.

i 've always been an easy kid, never talked back or had arguments with them. academically and socially I've made all the traditionally "good" and "modest" choices (although that's mostly to safeguard my future not to impress them)

i never have anything beyond a superficial relationship with my parents and i guess it's the first time she's brought it up. they're going to start talking about marriage a lot often. how do I deal with it? like how do I bring it up gently so it's not a shock when I straight up refuse to get married at 23.

i am asking for genuine advice btw bc i have absolutely no idea and nobody to talk to I really would appreciate it so much.

When I was in my last year of college they made us do an exercise where they asked us where we see ourselves in next two years. I wrote down that I would be teaching people, well it took me 3 years instead of 2 to reach there (COVID f*cked up the job Market) but I reached there at the end and that's what matters.

So I want to ask you today where do you see yourself in next 5 years? your answer can be personal life or professional life, it doesn't matter. I just want you to know about how your ideal life would be after 5 years from today. Remember dreams don't have limits so don't hold back and who knows this exersise of manifesting might become your reality :)

Well to answer myself, I would be 30, hopefully I would be pursuing my PhD and probably have some money saved up by then. I would still be in India, out and proud. And my family would have been fully accepted me by then. Might have hunky body with marvellous tits and a beautiful garden with a cat. That's what my ideal life look like in 5 years.

Where are we planning our Xmas holidays? Drop your destinations! I am planning Mussorie. #gay #holidays

I'm seriously fed up with Tinder ! I created my profile on tinder last week and till now I've had almost 25-35 matches.

I was very excited and curious seeing so many matches.

However till now only selective 5-8 of the matches have actually conversed with me.

Others have not even replied to my simple Hi !

What's this obsession with these guys to collect matches and not even text a simple hello?

For General discussions and interactions\~ And anything you have in mind

This is a scheduled post, that’ll be posted every day at 12PM.

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If you’re looking for dates/friends, kindly go to the pinned dating thread.

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Be kind and civil<3

Well I don't think I'll get to see the indian society change much during my youth. I have always wondered what would the upcoming decades behold for our community.Lets discuss what would the indian lgbtq community look like in 2074.

1. Do you think the society as a whole would become as progressive as europe or us when it comes to accepting the lgbt community?
2. )Will people be still vary of coming out to thier parents?
3. )To what extent do you think homophobia would be prevalent?

4)How easy would it be for LGBT community to live openly ?

Etc

I know predicting things 50 years into the future is next to impossible. But no one stops us from contemplating(or daydreaming) how things would be few decades down the line. I really hope things would be better. I am hopeful that Same sex marriage would become legal in the next 1 or 2 decade.

A lot of my friends started jobs along with me a year ago in mid twenties and have started planning about marriage, which part of city to settle in, how much to save for marriage, child education, which country to move in with their wife, Started working out these timelines with their girlfriends. I wanted to know if there are some resources that teach such future planning for people who plan on remaining unmarried for various reasons? I think money won't be that much of a requirement so more focus should be in career growth and forming friendships that last as well as remaining healthy on your own, avoiding loneliness. What do you think?

First Diwali with a little lipstick on, and I feel like a whole new me! 💄 Never thought something so small could make me feel this good and confident. Loving this look, and the extra pop it brings to the festival vibes.

You can check picture on my profile!

Anyone else try something new this Diwali?"

What did you do to make it special?

I am 25 will turn 26 this month, never been in a relationship.. It feels kind of weird because I gir chances to be in a relationship but then guys weren't worth it..

I never had sex tbh.. I still feel I wish it I could be a in relationship but ny desperation has ceased.. I no longer care about anything but my career

My parents want me to get married.. But I don't know.. Like all I care about is my studies and getting a good jobL Every night I crave for a hug or cuddle but then that's fine if I don't get it.

I imagine it.. That's how I survive

Imagination as my better half.

A moment of weakness where i just installed Grindr and wondered if I'll find someone sane enough to date or have a potential relationship with 😭 i guess I shouldn't have. Well heres my rant!!! I did find a guy within an hour, he was good, young and totally my type (im pretty my type is exactly where we have a problem, but let's discuss that later) we were clicking with eachother, similar goals n stuff and he was bi (omg I'm not bi phobic) he was a bit too scared to reveal his social media. Then obviously i also started getting obnoxious texts so i just sort of quickly asked if we can jump to some other texting app such as telegram, but thats when he said "what if I don't like you?" Well okay reasonable. Then there was this question raised by me "what are you looking for" his answer being "anything but a relationship" "so even if we like eachother, you wouldn't want a relationship?" "no, i don't want any serious commitments" "okay"

The end !!! Story of my life 🫶

There's this movie - swag recently released and it's available on prime .

I'm really surprised & happy with the representation of a transwoman character in the film (even though it's played by a cis person)

Do check it out guysss !!

I can finally add swag to the list of telugu queer representation following awe and vedam 😭

For General discussions and interactions\~ And anything you have in mind

This is a scheduled post, that’ll be posted every day at 12PM.

​

​

If you’re looking for dates/friends, kindly go to the pinned dating thread.

​

Be kind and civil<3

I was basically forced to come out (only to my mom dad and sis) cuz my parents caught me kissing a guy (my then bf whom I HAD to break up with)... My mom and sister accepted me, but my dad is extremely homophobic... At first he was angry but later he started crying saying I'm sorry that I can't understand you because you're coming from a place which I never thought existed... This also affected his health in a very bad way... So bad that he started having panic attacks and stuff.. eventually (literally just two days later) I just lied to them that I'm normal and promised them that I'll change (because seeing how badly it was affecting my dad's health I hated myself for being gay. And even my mom also started crying), saying to them that it was just my mind playing tricks on me... This happened 3-4 years ago... And the uneasiness in my family finally dissipated and we're back to being a normal family... I'm 19 years old and I'm extremely concerned about my future because obviously I'm expected to marry a woman but I don't wanna destroy another person's life by marrying like that... I've forced myself a lot to try and become straight but that's just not how sexuality works ... You are what you are, and I am gay. But now, nobody knows. My parents think that I'm a normal human being now... And nothing is more valuable to me than my parents' happiness... Because all my life they've been the best ever... I love my parents and my sister more than anything else... They're the best family I could ask for... So I have no idea what will happen in the future....... And honestly I was thinking a lot and it struck me that lavender marriages exist... But I'm not so sure about that cuz finding a partner itself is difficult, and lavender marriages are their own war field... Anyways I just joined this sub and I wanted to share my story and ask for advice on how to proceed further with my life...

Almost always queer spaces have been occupied by left wing ideologies. But personally for me there is this right wing, individual rights based philosophy called objectivism that has helped me tremendously in understanding the whole gay dynamics, society and politics. And how to survive, live and thrive as an individual while being in this world. I wonder if anyone has reached the same paths ? If someone doesn't know, I kinda write a post about it sometime ago here https://www.reddit.com/r/askgaybros/s/9j2Nw12JxR

Hi, many of you might know me, from my post on how can i get started with HRT. A few Redditer said, I should get a new name, and be comfortable around with using it and getting called by it.

I am unable to think. Please suggest some names for a Bengali Girl. I am not specifically looking for Bengali origin as I have grown up in Delhi.

Update:- I have decided the name, my new name is, Anshiqa.

Hello, Everyone Anshiqa here.

I just wanted to share my thanks to Queer Eye (JVN and gang seasons)

Before watching Queer Eye, I had only two perspectives regarding gay people,

One, emerging from corn, just an emotionless raw animal like interactions between two people.

Another, from the sad narrative, gays are always bound by their sadness because of sexuality.

But Queer Eye changed it for me, it made me realise we are normal. We can be fit, we can be best in our professional life and lastly, we can be happy and helpful to others.

I know they are so many varied appreciably represention on media today but it was not the same before covid (Atleast in my bubble).

I heard that's it's hell a lot of scripted. But it's okay, it gave me hope. I love the show. Badly need Indian version 😭.

Friday is my exam.. I wasted lot of time in reddit.. But this kind of hate is really hurting 😭

Since adolescence I've always been scared of sex and anything sexual, and since at that time I didn't know gay relationships exist, I always avoided girls. At 18, I learnt about LGBTQ and realized that I might be gay, because honestly I was romantically attracted to certain boys. But recently (I'm 21 now), I thought that if I completely eliminate the "sex" part from my life, girls might be attractive as well. But still I find that I'm more inclined to trans girls pre hrt, like whatever I saw on Reddit on trans subreddits. Cis girls are...okay, like they can be attractive at times but the fear from my past years is there, I can't be very comfortable with them in a romantic relationship.

In fact, my previous relationship was with a transgirl from Spain, who btw didn't know she's trans when we went into the relationship. I was always supportive though and I thought that i wouldn't care about my sexuality since I'm myself not sure and just stay with her even after she came out to me. But now I feel like this might have affected me. I was attracted to her words, her nature, her eyes, etc. Her gender didn't really mean anything to me.

Question is, am I attracted to transgirls more than cis women because of their "boyish" features that are still visible? (If you're a transgirl reading this, just know that you're the prettiest girl ever, I'm writing that only to make people understand what I feel, and in no way do I endorse transphobia.) Like, I'll be attracted to a transgirl in a hoodie and jeans, rather than a cis girl wearing a sari or a salwar kameez. Is this an internalized transphobia in me? Or worse, am I a chaser? I really need some opinions regarding this.

These days this is something that has been bothering me soooo much. I feel the gay world has been shaken up so bad with the trauma of coming out and dealing with family, parents, society etc and then landing into either leftist queer politics or sex dominated hookup culture. In the midst of all of this people haven't been able to themselves as individuals, people with their own selfish interests, enjoyments etc. And I personally am trying so hard to explore that space with other guys who want to talk about how they feel, their insecurities, their vulnerabilities, their psychology and how they see themselves and the whole community around them. And what they want from life, and have a life beyond both straight and the gay world, a life that's their own, personal where nobody else exists other than their dreams and fantasies and goals and their ideas. It helps me understand myself more and also mature myself in understanding other people. Like I have tried seriously dating people and having these insights about myself and other people and what matters and don't matter in a person have been so helpful in having me navigate those spaces. And I feel this is something that is soooo missing in the community where things just don't move beyond coming out/queer politics or the hookup culture, where people are not maturing enough or fast enough to take responsibility of your own feelings and another person's feelings, and both of the lives together. One of the skills I think are so important to have a meaningful relationship with anyone.

I (24M) live with my parents in a tier-3 city. My parents are toxic bigoted UCs who constantly say hateful stuff. Yesterday my mother told me 'gay' people accosted her and my father on the road, when she actually was referring to trans people. If I were to come out to her ever, I would have to first explain basic queer terminology.

My mother has said transphobic stuff in the past as well, but my parents are especially casteist and anti-Muslim. My parents are part of a caste org and lot of their social life revolves around it. They have become more obsessed, frequenting businesses in the caste org, going to meetings, donating money, etc. They tried to get me to join it as well, but I've thankfully avoided that. They have also grown more religious over the last few years, and they ofc have ties with BJP-RSS as well. I've not told them about my school and college friends in other cities, many of whom are queer and are also from different religions.

I don't plan on coming out to them anytime soon. I don't have a job yet so I'm financially dependent on them. Given the situation currently, I feel that my best chance is to move out of the country. Paradoxically, that would require their financial support and hence would need me to stay on good terms with them until I put my plans in place. The problem is that my mental health is absolutely in ruins, despite being in therapy for two years. No amount of therapy can undo the amount of hate my parents and their relatives have spewed in the last few years. I constantly keep falling ill, dissociating, and isolating myself.

I am really bad at confrontation and socially anxious, and I feel guilty for not confronting them as well. I ended up journaling with hundreds of entries of bigoted stuff I've heard from them. The only way I can see them coming to terms with my sexuality is if they completely rethink their worldview which I don't think is going to happen. I've really moved away from caste and religion after all of this. I just can't stand religious ceremonies anymore, and festivals have been ruined for me because they're just an occasion for my extended family to gather and spew hate. So in a sense I'm in the closet not only as a gay man but also as an anti-caste agnostic while I'm being forced to follow religious and caste dogma.

i am 33 year unmarried man I have a feeling Like a woman since i was kid. but i kept this secret upto me till now, However i able to kept this secret because i have control over my feelings . i never attracted sexually towards male. but i always attracted to females . but inside me there was a woman which i can feel everytime .i cant understand what i am exactly.

So I was happily in the closet for a good 22 years. I have done my MBA and was all ready to start a new life in a new city. The sense of financial security was also there. I thought it was the right time to come out

Mom - I was sure she would be devastated, but when I told her she told me - Beta I am worried and scared for you, it will be very tough for you, my chota bacha will have to face so much pain but mujhe koi farak nahi padta, Mera ladka Mera ladka hai, chahe ladki se pyaar kar warna ladke se. And she told me she already knew to some extent always. Never expected he would be that open minded

Dad - I was a perfect posterchild. Topper throught, NIT, IIM. Never put a foot wrong. He couldn't accept that his son is not conventional here. But he wasn't harsh, he said let's deal it somehow. He took 3-4years to slowly come around. Today also he doesn't openly acknowledge it, but he is accepting in his own way.

Best friend (not now)- He was completely taken aback, went to a temple to cleanse himself, told me how dare I didn't tell him, he changed infront of me and what not. I politely told him, I loved him as a friend and never had feeling for me, he was rude and told him to fuck off

Work - This is one I regret, never expected the back lash. People were great to my face, but the amount of backlash I faced I didn't expect. I was removed of key projects, people acted weird before me, I was subtely asked not to attend a Diwali party. It was never loud or aggressive but I was made to feel all the time I was different.

Other friedns - I was shocked to see the number of people who didn't want to be associated with me, no one was rude but somehow would not invite me to things. There were so many people who were kind as well. But so many friendships were destroyed in the process

This is my story. I neither tell anyone to come out or not, it's very personal for every queer individual, you alone decide if you want to come out or if you don't ever want to also.

Some context about me: I come from a middle class family, my dad is a journalist, mom a home maker and I come from modest means.

What's your story

I’m 23 closeted MTF from New Delhi. It’s been 12years i’ve been suffering with dysphoria and existential issues. And i never had have any courage to come out to my parents like how they are going to respond over it and wht set of question they gonna ask me? Wht if i get my GD certificate first and then come out to them while present it. Will it makes the things easier for me?

I always thought I was straight, picturing my life with a girl by my side. It felt certain, like a path I’d always known I’d take. But lately, I’ve felt this strange pull—an urge I can’t quite explain, a curiosity to be close to a guy. The thought started small, almost like a passing curiosity, but it’s been growing, taking up more space in my mind than I’d expected.

Eventually, I gave in, and in the moment, it felt right, like something I’d been holding back. But as soon as it was over, regret crept in, lingering and unsettling. I’d feel strange, like I was betraying the person I thought I was. Days would pass, and just as I’d think I’d moved on, that same urge would find its way back, drawing me in again.

Now, it feels like I’m standing between two versions of myself, neither fully mine yet both pulling me in. I try to shake it off, to move on, but each time the cycle loops back, I’m left with more questions and fewer answers. It’s a strange feeling—like drifting between what I’ve always known and something unknown, wondering if I’ll ever find solid ground.

Please help me navigate this I’m tired af from this cycle !!!! 😩

Its a movie on Netflix which was originally released in 2009. I love it sm, its a great watch and if you haven't watched it, please do. And if you have, I wanna know your thoughts.