My boyfriend and I recently broke up and it’s ruined my perception of things. The breakup was over something he did and it’s made me question the validity of our entire relationship and i’ve been completely thrown off by how quickly things have ended. Because of that i’ve been caught between being hurt about what he did and being so sad about losing him that i’ve been all over the place. Long story short i regret giving him so much grace and kindness in the end and wish i had told him off because the more i sit with what he did the more cruel i realize it was and wish I had realized sooner. We’ve already talked in person for the last time and i wouldn’t say this stuff over text so how do I accept that i may never get to say what i want?

Hi I have really bad adhd and anxiety. I’m In my early 20s for most of my life I’ve been a worrier I worry about the stupidest things but I can’t turn my brain off. I just don’t know what to do I feel lost. I feel like I’m failing my kid by always being in my head. I can’t even focus on playing with him because my minds always jumping to what’s next, and worrying about things to come. I need to end this cycle but I don’t know where to start. Any advice is welcome thank you in advance!

We all do it. We set a big goal, thinking this will be the thing that changes everything. That once we hit that milestone—whether it’s landing the dream job, making six figures, or getting in shape—life will suddenly feel different.

But here’s the truth: accomplishing the goal isn’t what changes you.

The real transformation happens in the process of getting there.

It’s the late nights, the discipline, the mindset shifts, the failures, the resilience you build along the way. That’s what actually shapes your life. Not the finish line.

Because once you reach the goal? You’ll realize it’s just another step. Another milestone. And if you haven't changed along the way, it won’t feel as fulfilling as you imagined.

So instead of obsessing over the end result, focus on who you're becoming in the process. That’s where the magic happens.

What’s a goal you once achieved that didn’t feel as life-changing as you expected? Drop a comment—I’d love to hear your take!

Ok so I’m going to make this real simple for you guys. You only have so much energy to give people in a day.

How much energy are you giving the people that matter?

If you don’t know the answer to this question, take a very long personal inventory of your top 10 most important relationships in your life.

Write down each persons name, and write 3 things that you are thankful for that they bring you.

If you are spending your time giving energy to people that don’t even know who you really are, that cannot be a judge of your character, you are not giving these people that matter the energy they deserve.

The attitude that you want to display is rooted in gratitude for those that enhance your quality of life. If you are wondering why certain people don’t like you, you are wasting energy. The sad truth that will hurt some peoples hearts is that some people just suck and not everyone is going to like you. But hey, if everyone loved everyone equally, no relationships would be special and they wouldn’t mean as much. Life is about contrast and we need bad experiences and relationships to give us perspective to have gratitude for the good relationships that matter

Have you ever spent a lot of time at a toxic job or hanging with the wrong friends? It eats away at you. It makes you feel like you need to be someone that you are not. This is in my opinion what makes you feel the most exhausted and drained. This is what makes you question yourself, question the validity of your character. Before you developed social barriers, you weren’t afraid to be who you are. The highest, most authentic version of yourself is the version of you that is the most confident, which brings me to my final point

To truely not give a fuck is to consciously choose what to give a fuck about. We have to give a fuck about the people that deserve it, and not give a fuck about the people that don’t.

Some people dont like me. I'm talked about behind my back at work all the time, and some people blatantly aren't friendly with me at all. And it bothers me. I overthink and obsess on the thoughts when at home all the time. I feel uneasy around work and worried what people are saying about me to each other. How do I quit caring!? How do I not let this 'get my goat'?

Those who fear judgment often fail to fully realize how everyone is judged with minimal information. This ignorance leads them to conform in an attempt to minimize criticism. Ironically, when they still face judgment, they begin to question their worth and dive deeper into conformity, perpetuating a cycle of self-doubt.

if you fap your bonner 20 times a day, you wont be able to give a fuck because of post nut clarity.

This is a challenge for myself. Not really something to win but to simply forget I was playing it in the first place. Lack of mood swings and some stability in my life is my main goal but I genuinely want to obliterate the fear and anxiety and stress you’ve actively put me through for years. You’ve put me through so much and I did so much for you and you hurt me over and over again. And you know what? You weren’t worth it. Challenge accepted, you don’t get to break me anymore.

Stop accomodating people in their need of praise on r/howtonotgiveafuck.

It is a subreddit for how to not give a fuck for fucks sake. Do you all actually think you can learn how to not give fucks if all you get is compliments? Stop with the compliments to all the people on here fishing for it by their art works or whatever they want to hear praise about! Tell them how to be better! Tell them those colors suck, the lines are ugly, you'd never hang it up in your own living place! Help people on here to believe in themselves, instead of helping them get dependent on others by constantly feeding their need of validation!

I just feel like I've lost 10 yrs of my life in confusion anxiety fear and shame. Now I'm realizing its all about self image. Whatever I think and feel is how I'm reacting and this has shaped my life. It feels like I have stunt growth even though I'm only in mid20s stage of life. I'm just tired how I'm not taking actions and allowing self doubts and fear to control me.

Had this moment last week that changed everything. Was trying to make someone like me (changing how I talk, hiding my weird interests, the whole act) when it hit me:

Why am I trying so hard to be liked by someone who doesn't like the real me?

It's actually exhausting trying to be everyone's cup of tea. And honestly? Some people like coffee. Some people don't drink hot drinks at all. And that's fine.

Started just being myself:

• Making my weird jokes
• Being honest about my interests
• Saying what I actually think
• Not laughing at jokes I don't find funny

And yeah, some people aren't into it. But the ones who are? They're actually into ME, not some fake version I created to be likeable.

Turns out the secret to not giving a fuck isn't about being tough - it's about being real and letting the right people find you.

my tears, my hatred, my love, my emotions, my heart, my soul, my energy are simply not worth wasting on people who only care when it’s convenient. It’s a hard pill to swallow especially when the people who only care when it’s convenient for them are the people who are supposed to love you selflessly and endlessly, but once you accept that those people simply aren’t worth it and that anything you lack now you will gain in the future, you feel at peace with yourself, with your soul, with your situation. my energy and any segment of it is simply not worth spending on those who don’t appreciate or respect it as much as I do.