I (21f) have been contemplating about coming out to my mom or not a lot these days need your help regarding this.

She is a single mom(my only financial support), very traditional (Indian brow family), she doesn't even know that even girls can be gay too.

I got a younger sister she knows about me and accepts it but doesn't support it, like at the end of the day she thinks I am gonna marry a guy.

Few of my cousins know about me they are okay with it.

My best friend(Muslim) knows about me she accepts it but we really never talk about it. She never brings in up and I never bring it up too.

I dated a girl once we been in a relationship for like 2yrs. At the end she cheated on me with a guy (can't really blame her she was young and trying to explore her sexuality further).

My remaining family is pretty much homophobic and conservative and my mom loves everyone of them to the core because they are all she got...

I completed my undergrad, applied for masters in usa. Got an admit in a good clg. And I have time till aug 2024, currently applying for visa and everything.

Lastly...

The thing is I am having anxiety and panic attacks every day, I am having difficulty sleeping and concentrating on work or myself, my weight increased a lot, my procrastination is going through the roofs... Everyday I feel worthless... Like I am hiding something.

Being gay makes me feel guilty

And I know it's wrong

But sometimes I feel like ... Lighting a cigarette infront of my mom and say I am gay and be finally able to breathe and live like a human.

Uffff what should I do ?

Ignore any spelling mistakes or grammatical mistakes... English is not my first language.

I (17 f) am a lesbian. I've known for nearly three years now and still haven't come out to my parents. I recently came out to my brother (22 m) during a conversation about dating. It went well and got me thinking about coming out to my parents and sister. My sister (23 f) has recently started using a dating app and the topic of me and her dating/marrying men has come up often in the past few weeks. I feel slightly uncomfortable with the idea, but mostly I feel guilty for lying to my family and not being true to myself.

When I first realized I was gay I told myself I would come out when I turned 18, so I could have time to figure out who I was, how my family would react, and if it came to it I would be an adult who could make my own legal decisions. The problem is that my 18th birthday is coming up soon and I have become increasingly more nervous as the days go by. I think they'll all be supportive, but I'm still nervous. My mom has become more open minded over the last few years, but is still very traditional. As for my dad, I don't think I've ever heard him state his opinion on same sex relationships, since it doesn't affect him he doesn't really care. My sister is open minded, but has a very set view of the world and how she sees me.

Another major problem is that while figuring out who I am I had to break some of my family rules about movies and the internet (i.e. I'm not supposed to have reddit). Queer representation in kids movies/shows is minimal so I watched shows outside of my "rating allowance" to see characters like me. I am not allowed on YouTube if it is not a school assigned video, but watching wlw tiktok compilations and videos made by queer creators really helped me figure out who I am.

How do I come out to my family while also avoiding punishment for breaking family rules? Should I wait until I turn 18? How much do I share with them? Sometimes I feel confident and like I don't owe my family an explanation, but the rest of the time I feel nervous about how they will react and what that means for the rest of my life. Thank you for your time and any advice will help.

P.S

I'm dyslexic so please ignore any spelling or grammar mistakes.

So. I’m planning on coming out to my parents soon as genderfluid and omnisexual, which is great, but I’m young (13), and they probably won’t believe me. They also seem to have some level of discomfort they feel towards nonbinary people (enbies) and my dad has a bad experience with gay people and has shown a strong dislike towards they/them pronouns.

That’s my first problem. Here’s my second one.

I take ballet, which is a very gendered sport, and I’m worried about that a lot. I‘m not sure if the haircut I’d like would be appropriate. So, that’s that. I’ve also started preparing for pointe and have been exercising in a certain way that would help me dance as an female, but not as a male. I also don’t have the same levels of testosterone as the male sex, so I wouldn’t be able train as a male or, at least, it would be harder for me to do so. And, if I were to dance as a female, I’d have potentially to keep my long hair, and therefore, keep the dysphoria that came with it.

So… Should I even come out? I’m ready, but I don’t know about the other factors in my life.

i'm coming out to my mom as bi or pan (i'm still not 100% sure but i think i'm bi) and non-binary may 4th. I'm coming out through a google doc and i'm wondering if it sounds good or not, and I cant contact my friends because my phone is broken.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello, you should be seeing this on your birthday of 2022. There has been something I have been holding in for a long time, and I decided this should be your present.

I think I might be bi or pan, and non-binary. I'm not 100% sure on my orientation yet but I know that I don't just like guys and that I'm not a girl or boy. Please respect my privacy, for example please don't ask stuff like “anyone in mind?”. Please don't go telling everyone because if i'm telling you I trust you. Also don't go looking for “conversion therapy” i'm NOT confused. I trust you with this and I will tell you when I come out to people like my friends or the rest of the family. Also don't ask how i know this, i know this because i have had crushes on boys girls and non binary people (will NOT disclose their identity). If you have any questions don't be afraid to ask me whenever. Like I said, just respect my boundaries and I'll be happy. The reason I'm doing this is because I finally feel comfortable with myself, I have accepted the fact that i’m not a cis/het. Please don’t be a bigot and I love you guys.

then i have stuff like how to help me, my preferred pronouns, flags to get me or getting me binders etc. It would be way too long for this.

I wanna come out by telling two closest sisters first but I don’t know how or what to say. Also I’m nervous about it even though I don’t have to be because one of them is gay.

Hello! I came out sometime a few months ago. Though, I haven’t been able to talk much about my experience.

To be honest, I’m in an odd place. It’s something I’m still struggling with, and I’m in a position that really, there’s no good choice no matter what I do. My mother told me I broke her heart, over and over again, and she cried. We didn’t talk about that again for a long time, and she told me she wants me to be bisexual, not lesbian. She believes I’m forcing it on myself, (feel it may be important to note here I am 17 years old. I am capable of deciding my sexuality.) and that I’m too stubborn. Really, if I don’t end up with a guy, which probably won’t happen, as I’m not attracted to them, she’s going to say I forced myself to be that way. Anyways. Thanks if you’ve made it this far. Hope you’re all staying safe, and I wish you the best of Look in your endeavors.

Right off the bat, I'm gay. Well I have known since middle School my attractions towards guys, I've always hid it as best I could. I didn't come out to anyone until my second year of college, that is, 2 years ago. But at that point I was still hiding the truth. I stated to friends I was Bi, but eventually slid the scales to being gay because I was testing the waters with them. Pretty much all of them were okay with it, and still are, at least the ones I still talk to. This however, is only friends I've made at college, and definitely not family or anyone I grew up with. I ponder whether I should wait until I can actually support myself before I come out to my parents, or if I should do it now. I feel like my mom would honestly have some issues, but overall be fine "as long as you're happy". My dad however... Has made many slurs towards the lgbtq+ community. This makes me feel like he'd be likely to not want me to be in his life anymore. But then I get the thought of him doing a complete 180 like how my grandma did when she found out my mom's cousin was gay... I dunno, kinda just want more opinions on this, or even links to others threads on the subject.

14,M need help coming out as gay to my gf I've been seeing for 3½ months.

I wanted to make some community oriented videos since trans day of visibility was two weeks ago there may be a lot of new people in the community, I hope this helps ☝️💔🥀💯

https://youtu.be/rNHk1zweb7M

So there’s no surprise that I’m a gay male age 19, and I’m worried to come out to my family. They keep on going on about that they don’t care if any of there children are gay. But not caring and actually having a son that is are two different things. And I really want to come out I just don’t know what’s going to happens.

So i am 14 years old(M), and i think im gay or bi, im not sure. I just dont know how to come out to my friends/parents. I think my parents will be ok with it because they have gay friends. But im worried about my friends and how they may not accept me.

I dont know how to do this, i dont know what to do, anyond agve an ideas?

I am a gay (17yo M) and i want to come out to my parents. I stopped dating my girlfriend and she knows that I’m gay and we’re good friends. But my parents don’t even know that I’ve broken up with her and they definitely don’t know I’m gay.

I’m a 12 year old bi male and need help coming out to family I have already told friends however I’m terrified of telling my parents any help would be greatly appreciated thanks

I have had homosexual feelings since I was ten. I am fourteen now and just realised my parents hate LGBTQ and now I am scared please send support

I'm a girl and have recently figured out that I'm bisexual. My mom has talked to me about this, that only a man and woman are to be together, since God made Adam and Eve like that. I don't know what my dad thinks about the topic. I'm scared of what my mom will say about me when I tell her, but I'm more scared of my dad's reaction since I don't know if he will yell at me, which I always find scary. My friends I know will accept me but as for family I don't know.

Any tips on how?

I always looked at my friend Marcos as someone who had his head on straight and was always 100% driven to make his dreams come true. However, between 2009 and 2012, Marcos vanished from our lives and became somewhat of a mystery. However, one can only be so mysterious in the age of social media. He appeared online to have had found Jesus and was pictured wearing a shirt that read ''ex-homosexual.'' I, we and I'm guessing anyone who knew him at the time was befuddled by it. But by the time our paths recrossed, he was back to normal and seemed to have embraced his identity. Today, I'm getting the story directly from Marcos on my podcast Them, That and This. What was going on in his life during that time and why did he feel the need to suddenly reject a part of himself and embrace the Jesus?

I need help my family and friends are going through a lot. There all very supportive of the lgtbq+ community but they don’t think you can know unless you try things. I’m a virgin and if I tell them they will think I’m not. My family already thinks I’m slutty. Help I just need to tell someone. I don’t even know for sure if I’m bi or something els because I don’t have much knowledge in this subject. I just now I’m not fully straight. Help me please.

I'm a girl, and I'm a pansexual, my family are all asian, and my parents are homophobic, my mom and i talk about LGBT 2 or 3 times before and she's is absolutely giving me mixed signal, the first time she said she wouldnt mind my sis being gay but one time when I mentioned lgbt she seem disgusted and absolutely hate it but lately she said having daughter that have a girlfriend is just like having the gf as another daughter so I'm very confused, I'm still young and will probably come out(if I want to) in another 3-4 years or not my mom will just think I'm too young to know my sexuality. I recently got a gf. We both are willing to go as far as we can, but we had another problem. In my country, most people don't accept lgbt and its illegal (my country is Islamic) I need a little support and help on what I should do.

14 Male , BI thinking of coming out but I'm terrified what my friends and family are going to say. Reading the bad things that have happened to others who have come out I'm afraid, that my parents are putting on a act to seem inclusive but if I say anything my relationship with them will over.

Hi! I'm exploring how to come out this year. I KNOW I'm going to, and I'm also scared shitless. Those closest to me know I'm gay. I'm out where I live. I'm not out with most family or publically like Facebook.

I'm trying to sort out what's the best way for me to come out... and well, I'm not sure! :) Do I call family members and tell them one on one? Do I just come out on Facebook (and other channels) and let the chips fall where they may?

I'm in my late 30s. I was married to a woman years ago. And I also worked (years ago) in a place that was not very accepting of gays,... so this will probably be a surprise to most people.

I'm hoping for sincere, honest thoughts as it's a bit uncomfortable to ask about this on Reddit.

Thanks everyone!

So I'm a 24 f and I know I'm bi but I'm afraid to tell my family . My mom always rants that if you are gay you are an attention seeker if you are trans you are disgusting and mentally I'll and if you are bi you are hated by the LGBT community because bi people are desperate attention seeking ,idiots who cant get anybody and that those kind of people aren't allowed in her family and, i think my dad might know but he's really accepting of it. I'm afraid of what my family will think of me, and I dont know how to go about it with out worsening my anxiety or depression.

So I’m bisexual(I’m pretty sure) and I was thinking about coming out to my mom. Me and my 3 friends are bisexual and I was debating on telling them. I think they once said something and it being homophobic. I’m really worried. Should I just send a text to her saying I’m bisexual or a gif saying I’m bisexual? I watch a video(50 ways to come out) and it said that they can make a video for me to come out... I’m not sure.... I need advice. One of the YouTuber I watched is bi and she said that she heard that when you come out, your life will become better. I need someone to help me.

I am a 48 male and I have known for a long time of my attraction to men, but have denied it. I cant anymore. I want to come out and free these feelings I have, but I am not sure of my first steps. I know at my age it should come easy but it is not. I guess the hard part is trying to act on my feelings. Where to go to meet other men and such. Anyways, any help would be helpful. Thanks

Hi everyone! In the past year I've been trying to find myself and I'm sure now I'm Bisexual. At the same time my mom mostly (My dad kinda) are homophobic. My mother thinks anyone that is LGBTQ+ is sick and I feel like I only have my brother to accept me for me and not just see my sexuality. Since I'm so young though I can't go anywhere and I feel trapped and I know my Mom will never accept me. What should I do?

Im pansexual, and I really want to come out to my parents. They don’t really understand sexualities other then gay, lesbian, and bi. So this is might be a doozy for them. But I can’t keep this part of me hidden from them any longer. It’s so tiring to have to pretend all the time around them and I just want to be able to me myself around them. But I’m worried that if I come out to them that they will ask if I’m in a relationship, which I am. And I don’t know if they would react well to the person I’m dating. Along with that I’m not sure how they’ll take it. I don’t know if they’ll be okay, confused or won’t let me hang out with my female friends anymore. I don’t know what to do. Do I wait to come out to them when I’m older? Or do I sit them down and tell them? If I could get some advice on this it would be g r e a t l y appreciated. Thank you.

i just came out to my mom as bi, she was in denial, and wouldnt look at me in the eyes, she said that shes disappointed but that she accepts me, but just needs a moment to process. i told her that i wanted to tell my dad, and she said not yet because he’ll get mad and that she should talk to him first, and then i should, i told her not to tell him directly because i want him to find out from me, how and what should i tell my dad?