I'm just writing here so I can let out my feelings and find comfort in others in the same boat. My dad who is 59 got diagnosed with liver cancer in September of 2021. He was very healthy, never smoked, only drank on special occasions, and was very active, mountain biking almost everyday. He went through 2 cycles of chemo and was in his rest period back in March, however he got pain in his chest and went to the hospital. I remember I was driving home from school and an ambulance passed by, when I arrived home, I found out my dad was in there. about a week in to his stay at the hospital, he got covid. since he is very weak from the chemo the doctors don't think he can fight it off. so they put him in hospice and informed me about 2 hours ago that I should come see him soon, as they are afraid he might not make it another few days. My mum, my sister and I am sitting beside him in his room. He's sleeping and snoring away so I guess it's good to know he's not in any pain. All of his family except us are in the UK. (we are in Canada) . he was the best dad I could've ever asked for and I feel like my life is spiraling out of control.

Lost both parents to covid 11 months ago. The world is opening up now and everyone is living a normal life. Time has stopped for me and i find myself almost wishing that the pandemic continues on. It's painful seeing everyone around me visiting families and being happy about the removed restrictions.

Just a message in the void. Thank you for listening.

I lost my dad to covid after he was in an induced coma for a month. In the end, he couldn’t hold on. He passed on the 31/01/21.

It’s been over a year now but I miss him so much and I feel so alone in my grief at times. I couldn’t even be with him because he was in the USA. I live in New Zealand, where it wasn’t hit as bad as other places like the states. People here seem sheltered to how bad Covid is. People crack jokes about it, and I hear about Covid every single day.

I can’t help but feel frustrated and tired because no one around me understands the pain of losing someone so traumatically to Covid. We couldn’t even have a funeral. I’ve had no closure and every day I’m reminded about Covid. Every single day.

If anyone can relate to me, it would help ease the loneliness even a little bit.

I miss him so much. I wish I could just call him and he would pick up. I just want him to pick up. But I know he never will. I didn’t even get to say goodbye.

March 10th 2022, marks the 6 month mark of my grandmas death.

I remember people telling me the grief would become easier to bear, eventually you would think about it less, but when you did think about it, it would be more painful.

They were wrong and right.

It’s so much more painful with each passing day, there isn’t a day where I don’t spend at least 20 minutes crying over her death.

I remember our last call, and even though the doctors said she would be going home that week, she knew. She told me she loved me so much, and she would always be proud of me. And so much more.

I can never describe to those who don’t experience it, or see it, what intubation looks like, especially when it’s a loved one.

Seeing her like that still haunts my nightmares. Every night, on the nights I can remember my dreams at least, she appears, and so does her dead body they tried to semi-reconstruct after intubation.

People still try to ask if she had any underlying conditions, they try to tell me COVID is fake, all that political shit. But it doesn’t change the fact that COVID is real, and COVID took away the one person who will always love me unconditionally.

I hope there’s an afterlife, because everyday I wish I could see her again, just hear her talk to me one more time.

6 months and it still hurts more than ever.

I lost my Dad, Mark, to Covid on June 30, 2020. It still haunts me that I couldn't be with him.

On Monday, March 7 at 5:00 PM there will be a virtual vigil to honor and remember our loved ones. It is co-hosted by Marked By COVID and Reimagine. Marked By COVID is the group I started to call for permanent memorials and accountability.

• You can learn more about our work for memorialization by visiting www.CovidMemorialDay.org
• If you'd like your loved one honored in the vigil, submit photo of your loved one for the vigil here.
• Register here for the memorial. I hope to see some of you there.

I lost my dad a few years ago, but this loss hurts much more. This friend was my everything. The death cert says covid, but his family says it definitely wasn't covid. Their reasoning: he just collapsed one day without warning (while doing yard work outside), and that's not a covid symptom. After the collapse, he did live for another 2 weeks or so. Is sudden collapse with no prior symptoms a feature of covid?! What about having a weird/different sounding voice - is that a symptom of covid? (That's what I remember from talking to him 1.5 weeks before he died)

And why, you ask, am I hyperfocused on whether he died of covid? Well, if he did, I believe I might be to blame. I saw him about 3.5 weeks before he died, and hugged him indoors. I tested positive for covid 3 days later and started isolating. I believe I was exposed the night before I saw him. So what if I gave it to him, and this is why he died?

I'm in a really dark place about this, and am feeling obsession and guilt around it. The thing that would be most helpful to me, right now, is anything logical that might help me convince myself I didn't kill my best friend. For example, someone told me the "incubation" period is 24 hours or something. So if I was exposed 12-15 hours before I saw him (we spent about 10 minutes together), maybe the virus wasn't active in me in order to spread yet. That's comforting - but I haven't found enough evidence to back that theory up :( does anyone else know anything?

And yes, maybe obsession and guilt is just a grief coping mechanism, but that's where I am, and I'm looking for anyone who's willing to meet me where I am right now.

My ex called to give his condolences but then made the conversation all about him. I could go on about what he said, but what really made me mad was his final thought.

“Even though your mom died, things are already getting better and we should go out again.”

WTF?! Maybe I don’t want things in this world to get better because my mom isn’t here. It would be nice to know she dodged a bullet. However, I also don’t want anyone else to die. I can’t deal with another loss. Does anyone else have this mixed feeling of wanting the world to explode because then your love one really is in a better place?

Side rant: I’m starting to feel anger

I should be thankful my ex reached out, but it really triggered me. He isolated me from my own mother and did not display any respect for either of his parents. I use to be slightly bothered by the entitlement, but now I’m really bothered and was about to lashed out. I don’t want any other ex’s to contact me, not even a card. They can think and pray for my family on their own. Maybe I’m also alone in this thought. The combination of digging up past emotions mixed with grief is too much for me to deal with.

Mom died at age 56. No one expected her to die so damn young, or for her to die before Dad.

I'm the eldest of two, my younger brother and I have ASD.

Maybe it's due to being the eldest, but I've tended to have my stuff together and was more independent. Married, living in my own place, working, etc.

My brother still lives at home. He's working but relied on Mom heavily.

Dad relied on Mom to handle stuff like finances.

Gram lives in the in house, but she's Mom's Mom, and can be stubborn as Dad.

My aunt helps but she's on oxygen due to a preexisting lung condition. Plus she's raising a 13 year old, and my uncle is a disabled Vietnam vet.

My uncle lives far from home and has his kids to worry about too.

Mom was the glue that help the family together. From the moment she was hospitalized, I handled forwarding her texts to family and friends who wanted to be informed, and did the twice daily phone calls to check on her condition after she was on the vent. In fact, Dad asked me to be the contact person and talk to the doctor because he was having such a hard time coping with telephone conversations. The first time I was allowed to see her, doc wanted to meet and discuss what was next. They talked about DNR and comfort care because she had been on there for over 2 weeks, no improvement. Neuro showed decreased brain activity and I had to relate that to Dad. Then I called the social worker and had to coordinate getting everyone permission to come say goodbye. We were going to pull her off when we had to deal with the organ team. Then it turned out she was not viable.

On the morning of Feb 3, Dad and I made that last trip to the hospital.

When she was extubated, I was the one holding her other hand and trying to support Dad as he watched the love of his life die. That woman also was my mother...the best mother and confidante anyone could ask for. That night, I had to help my brother file for TCI because he was all spun up about HR at his job.

Dad made the urn, I embroidered the pall. He wrote the eulogy and I read it. I wrote the obit and coordinated with the police Dept (dad is a retired LEO) so they could escort us to the church after the wake. We picked up the ashes together. I organized the meeting with the priest to plan the memorial.

I'm beyond exhausted. Today, I helped Dad shop for dinner, and took care of his TCI, life insurance claim and FEMA assistance claim.

Now, we will also have to deal with probate, and getting Dad's affairs sorted. Everyone keeps telling me I've been the rock of the family, and that's awesome....but it's a lot. Also, until Dad and my brother get all sorted out, they'll be looking to me for help.

Is there any advice on how to shoulder that burden? I'm only 31 but lately have felt much, much older.

Right now we're all still grieving and returned to work. It feels like so much to juggle but it feels like there's not much of a choice. It just...sucks.

In the end, all I want is my Mom back. For her to tell me it's okay, and that I won't have to do all the errands and favors she would do for others. Mom was fully vaccinated but dammit underlying medical conditions and Delta did her in. She fought with the heart of a lion, but now she leaves these great big shoes to fill. 💔⚱️

She was 67 going on 68 this year and was perfectly healthy. The sweetest woman I’ve ever met and always knew how to put a smile on my face, gone. I still remember giving her the biggest hug the last time I saw her. It feels so unreal.

What pisses me off so much and puts me in such a depressed state is that she didn’t get to see anyone the last 10 days she was alive in the hospital. She died alone, and we didn’t even get to honor her properly. This f****** virus restricted any of us to see her one last time. The people we had to bribe just to have an open casket rushed her into the ground while we were giving her prayers and respects. I miss her so much and it just feels like a bad dream. It hurts me so much knowing my mom won’t have her mom to talk to anymore, that I won’t have my grandmother to see my future achievements. We’re devastated.

I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to feel, I don’t know how to cope. I’m so mad at this virus that my grandma didn’t get to continue to live and didn’t even get a proper burial.

I’m 20 and am going to school, but it feels so wrong and I have so much guilt trying to do schoolwork. It feels wrong to distract myself from this heartbreak when she didn’t get the proper honor her life deserved. Please, for the love of my grandmother, what do I do?

I lost my dear grandad to COVID last night. I found out this morning and I just feel so so numb and angry and in disbelief all at once. He was only 70 years old, active and the life and soul of every room he went into, I thought we'd have him for years yet. He brought me up until I was 6 years old and I've been so close to my grandparents ever since.

I'm just so angry and frustrated that both my grandparents were too scared to get vaccinated because of health conditions. My mum and I tried so hard to convince them and reassure them. I wish so so much I had done more and I'd convinced them sooner. They had finally agreed when unbeknownst to us they caught COVID and ended up in hospital the next day. They didn't tell us for two weeks because they didn't want to upset us. Once we knew, my grandma was out of hospital, whilst my grandad was in the ICU, but doing better. Until Sunday, he was in rehabilitation and a lot better. He was calling us, sending us panda and loveheart emojis and pictures of kittens to make us happy. And then yesterday, within 30 minutes all his organs had failed. I just can't believe it at all. I'm so angry at all the misinformation out there and all of my extended family that didn't push for them to get vaccinated and that have fake covid vaccine passports etc. I feel guilty I didn't do more and so angry that his death was perhaps preventable.

To make it worse, the funeral is in Ukraine so I can't even say bye to him because of the situation with Russia and the risk that I might end up trapped in a war zone. I sent him a message yesterday night that I didn't know he would never get to read and it just breaks my heart. I just feel so numb. He was my greatest cheerleader and my everything. I can't believe he's gone.

Doesn't make any sense. He was healthy, had very good kidneys, and went onto the ventilator and never made it off. I feel lost, confused, indenial. He passed on the 29th of January and we buried him this week. I miss you Dad

Does anyone know of online support groups using zoom or another similar platform? Specifically for people who've lost someone to Covid.

I was wondering at first about IRL support meetings, but that might not be realistic given the pandemic, so I thought zoom (or something similar) might also be good, if such a thing exists?

Back in August of 2021 I caught covid and ended up spreading it to my mom. I've been her primary care giver since my dad died in 2011. She was in poor health she had Parkinsons and in July she had a seizure that lead to the hospital finding two strokes.

She left with ems on a Saturday, we found out she had pneumonia and a blood clot in her lung. She ended up on a ventilator and then passed away in September. I feel this immense guilt, I should have been more careful I should have sent her to my brother's while I quarantined, I should have seen the strokes. I'm the reason she's gone.

My aunt feels the same that I'm the reason she's dead. I didn't force her to get the vaccine, I didn't get the vaccine. She went around my mom's funeral making sure I was in ear shot, asking "are you vaccinated?" If the answer was yes she responded with " oh good she wasn't." It seemed like she made every attempt to twist that knife and make sure I knew she saw me as a murderer.

I've been suicidal for months the only thing tethering me here is my pets. No one would take them in they'd end up in shelters where they would die. But the thoughts are so loud. "I'm a murderer" "I'm a horrible daughter and person" "Mom would still be alive if it weren't for me" I feel like I'm drowning.

My dad was 45 years old when Covid took his life. No pre-existing conditions, non smoker, non drinker, he was a healthy guy. But for whatever reason, Covid hit him hard.

When I tell people how he died it is immediately “well what else was wrong?”

Or when people say stuff like “you know an 84 year old smoker made it off the vent and is just fine” (this one really gets me angry, why did an old person live and my dad didn’t?)

Never in my life have I seen so many people dismiss and justify the deaths of others. When someone dies of cancer you don’t immediately ask “well did they drink a lot?”

I lost my Dad last May to COVID and I've been working hard to make sure that he is not forgotten. We need a federal COVID Memorial Day to honor, mourn, and heal. If you believe we should recognize a national COVID-19 Victims and Survivors Memorial Day, send a letter to your elected officials to tell them that it cannot wait! We have made it really easy to do using this form, and you can also find more info on the cite:

(https://actionnetwork.org/letters/send-a-letter-tell-congress-a-federal-covid-memorial-day-cant-wait/?source=web)

Please comment with questions or your reflections.

Hello, I'm Anna, a freelance journalist currently working on a commission about bereavement and work. I hope it's okay to post here, but please remove if not.

I'm looking to speak to people from the UK who lost someone during the pandemic and feel that they weren't adequately supported by their employer. For example – maybe you were didn't get enough bereavement leave, maybe you had to attend a zoom funeral during lunchtime then go straight back to work, or maybe you were told off for not being as productive as usual.

Ideally I'm looking for under-30s as that is the publication's target audience. You can message me on Reddit or drop me an email at annavictoriasamson@gmail.com. Thanks!

I can’t take it anymore. Everywhere I look someone thinks it’s funny to make a joke of covid. No one makes memes about cancer, dementia, strokes, etc. because that would be wrong in society’s eyes but somehow people got comfortable joking about covid. I wish it would stop

My beautiful, smart, amazing, loving mother is being taken from me before my very eyes. She did everything right, she was vaccinated the very SECOND she could. She stayed at home diligently, only leaving for her required appointments. She suffered from kidney failure, but that doesn’t make this okay, that doesn’t mean it’s justified that she’s dying at 53 years old. She was at a stage where it was still highly treatable and her prognosis was great. I can’t believe people are asking me “Well, was she sick already?” Does that mean this is somehow magically okay?

I’m 24 years old. I don’t have any other family. I’m dealing with this all alone. My brother told me to my face when mom dies, I will never see him again. He told me that while I was begging him to stay in contact with me, because I’m alone. He struggles with addiction and treats us all like he doesn’t love us. My grandma says we shouldn’t have a funeral for mom because “She didn’t have any friends, anyways.” That’s not true! And my mom deserves better than that!

I didn’t get to say goodbye before they put her on the vent. I didn’t think I had to, because she was getting better! She told me, “I’ve turned the corner, baby!” I will never forgive myself for that. I hope she knows how much I love her.

I’ve been there with her every day, holding her hand and talking to her and singing to her. The nurses said she can hear me. My own grandma and brother refuse to go. It infuriates me. I know if it were us in that bed, she wouldn’t leave us! She would physically fight anyone who tried to make her leave us. That’s the kind of mother she is.

They can’t stabilize her anymore. They haven’t been able to since they flipped her onto her back again last night at around 5. The medical staff has lost hope, and are telling us to prepare. This can’t be happening. I can’t live without her!

How will I ever do anything without her? I’ll just give it all up. I told my fiancé that we can’t get married if she doesn’t pull through. It wouldn’t even be worth it without her love and support. I can’t ever have children, because I can’t imagine giving birth without her to hold my hand, I’d have to do it all alone. And she would never meet them. Nothing in my life will ever be remotely okay if she’s not here. I cannot function as a human being without her. That should be me in that bed.

(I will add flair, on mobile, trying to figure it out.)

I’ve spent so much time feeling guilty for not forcing my mom to take care of her health, to take vitamins, to exercise. Now I (25 F) and fully vaccinated got covid for the second time and my symptoms are pretty similar to my mom’s before her immune system went haywire. I’m not overweight, have perfect blood work, been working out and taking dance classes consistently, been taking vitamins religiously and even tanning to get more vitamin D and STILL got terrible symptoms. Makes me feel like my mom didn’t even stand a chance. There’s probably nothing I could have done to save her.

Hey guys lost my parents last yr to covid five days a apart and now my siblings want to sell my parents house.. it's officially up for sale today and I saw the pics and the way my mom decorated it it was her pride and joy..I've been there since five years old and now 30 years old.. all three siblings live outside the country incl myself and only have one sibling left in the country where their house is.. it's not a great area but for me it's home..and my siblings being much older don't have the same attachment to it..it's sooo hard for me..can someone give me any comforting words or experiences or ways to deal with it ... Selling house is making their death so real

I'm so grateful to have found this sub. I've been browsing through stories, and this helps me a lot.

My dad died a few days ago. He had a lot of other health issues, too. He was neglected by the assisted living community. When I checked him back into (after a hospital stay), they needed to charge extra for the additional level of care he'd need. That was fine with me and him. But they completely overpromised on everything and delivered very little. (I'm angry at corporate, not at the overworked aides and so forth)

He couldn't walk and they would leave him sitting in his own piss and shit or not give him water. For a large monthly fee, he was promised constant help. He didn't even get a shower or bath. I was there constantly, trying to fill in the gaps. When he got covid, I made the choice to go into his room a lot (I'm self-quarantining still.. [fully vaxed, but just in case) because they just basically abandoned him. I wish they could've said "We can't provide the level of care he needs," so we could've made different choices. Near the end it was so bad, and he was deteriorating so quickly because of the covid. We were even trying to get a private nurse in there that he would pay for out-of-pocket, but they still were either unreachable or evasive and put barriers to that happening).

My problem is that I'm still so angry. My siblings agree that he was neglected, but they don't think I should still be angry or talk about it, that I should try to celebrate his life (I will eventually). I was his primary caregiver and I worked so hard to bridge the gaps, take him to appointments, get him in and out of his wheelchair, get him to the bathroom... Family weren't much help then either.

He wasn't ready to die. It wasn't his time. I think I'm feeling gaslit a bit, too, by the facility. If I called right now, today, to ask for a welfare check or for water, help, meds -- I think there is even a real possibility they'd say they just checked on him and he's doing great.

I'm also feeling guilty because I decided not to go down the night of. I had a bag packed. But I thought I'd go in the morning instead, but then it was too late. He died being not able to breathe.. I feel terrible now. I know it's not my fault. Just feel guilty.

Everyone keeps saying he's in a better place, or that now he's out of pain. These things are true technically. But it wasn't his time, and I can't cry because I'm still kind of in shock and angry and feeling guilty, too.

Today marks one year since my Mum lost her fight against Covid..in the end it completely invaded her body and it was more than she could take. She was stressed and exhausted from being my grandpas caregiver making her the perfect target for Covid.

I’ve missed my mother more than I could ever imagine. Sadness and grief has taken up residency in my brain , in my heart , in my soul really. I know it’s part of life, part of the healing process and it really sucks. I don’t feel healed, grief has no timeline, no schedule.

After taking on the very honorable role of caring for her father, it was meant to be her turn to live out her golden years.

The plan after Grandpa Ray passed, was for her to move to Texas so I could look after here. Life would’ve been easier for her and she could take it easy. I looked forward to it..even though I knew she might drive me crazy (lol). Sadly, she didn’t get the chance to be with me and my family , her grandkids and great grandkids. I didn’t get to take her out for errands or shopping along with many other things.

This breaks my heart.

Not talking to her every day sometimes more than once a day breaks my heart. She was the one that I could call and talk her ear off and make her laugh.

I still have so much to tell her.

It took her a long time to come to me in my dreams, and I was so happy when she finally showed up. In my dreams ,she tells me she misses me,but that she’s happy. She looks bright and beautiful and her hugs feel SO real. Dreaming of her isn’t enough ,but I guess that’s life and how it’s meant to be. I’ll take those dreams though and squeeze my eyes tight too stay asleep, be with her a few seconds longer.

As I said in my recent post about my grandpa’s passing, this year has been a total blur.

I turn 50 on Monday and in my head I imagined this picture of myself in a powerful stance, my hands on my hips,glowing perfect skin, my cape blowing In the wind with a crown on my head looking 50 square In the eye and saying “yep I’m fifty and fucking fabulous” Well, I’ll still be that woman when I wake up on Monday ,my hair might be a bit messy and my crown a bit askew but I’ll take that first step and think of my mother and continue to live a good life. I’ll choose kindness and I’ll try my best to happy. I’ll do this for me, but I’ll also do it for her since she didn’t get to.

Take my story as a cautionary tale , to love those around you to the absolute max.

Be good to Yourself ,take CARE of Yourself, eat that cookie.

Appreciate life and never take it for granted.

I love you Mum, I’ll be waiting for you in my dreams. 💕

My dad made it off the vent after 1 week. He was doing phenomenally and was supposed to go to rehab! The doctors were so happy. He ended up developing another lung infection and died as a result. I’m just struggling because we were so excited when he got off the ventilator and talked to us! I remember the exact location I got the call (while driving) that he was off the vent. I was so happy- I had to pull the car over! I was lucky that I had a week to talk to me dad and he was coherent and talking up until a half hour before he died. But just struggling to cope when I had so much hope. Just curious if anyone else had that experience. Hugs to you all!

I live in a place where you are not allowed to visit your relatives in the hospital. My deaf grandpa is dying, all alone, and we're still not allowed to go see him. They might let us see him once right before he dies, but it'll be too late by that point, and some of us live abroad and can't even enter the country. It's really cruel. I'm so worried that he'll think we've forgotten him, or he's desperate to speak to someone, but he can't communicate or hear anything. He must be in pain, confused, and lonely. I'm certain overworked nurses will not have the time to make sure he's drinking enough water and he'll sooner die of thirst. I feel angry toward people who are breaking the rules, not wearing masks, and prolonging the pandemic. My grandparent isn't dying of COVID but these hospital rules make this process so painful. My heart breaks for those of us who aren't able to reunite with our loved ones before they pass.

I feel like everywhere I go there’s always a reminder, its torture.

This isn’t for condolences, more to tell her story and my own.

US based in the midwest for context.

Mom was 69 years old in January 2020. I had just started a new job. We talked daily, sometimes several times a day over the phone. Our favorite topic was world affairs. She saw 13 Presidents, some pretty big accomplishments as well. Mom was a huge sci-fi fan. She found a ton of simple wonder in the moon landing, missions to mars, Star Trek. Mom got me hooked on Trek, Star Wars, Stargate, at a young age.

I asked her in February 2020 if she thought humanity could come together again. She’d tell me about this feeling she had in July 1969 when the moon landing happened. It was like the whole world was gathered in wonder. Bare in mind she had the perspective of those she knew at home and work. Not really anyone else over in the USSR, China, or the UK. Still that feeling she described sounded awesome. A collective planetary feeling of accomplishment. Then March 2020 hit. She told me she saw and felt like humanity as a whole was feeling the same thing again, but fear instead of pride.

Mom did all she could over the course of 2020 to protect herself. She was an overweight person, diabetic, terrible arthritis, and her medications for her arthritis lowered her immune system. Groceries were ordered online, delivery for stuff, I’d drop stuff at the front door, would do all I could to avoid direct contact with her even though I myself was doing much of the same measures.

Then in early July 2020, mom had a stroke. Got her to the hospital, sadly she spent her 70th birthday in a hospital. She was ok and healing, but not everything was coming back with her mental faculties. Doctors set her up with a long term rehab facility that would take her through 1 more month to get her on her feet again. Docs were certain she’d be good after another month.

August 2020 she goes to a nursing home, as they were the only long term facilities with stroke rehab in our area. Well the only ones her insurance would cover. My sister and I pooled our money trying to see if we could get her a nurse at home, it wasn’t enough. We had to rely on what was covered.

Ever have a cold chill run down your spine? Like you know shit is about to go really wrong. I had that.

I’ll never forget the day or the last phone call I had with mom. September 21st, 2020. Called to check on her. She was out of breath, coughing a lot, struggling to get air, and they had her on oxygen. They confirmed she was positive for covid. She was stable and able to be at the nursing home for treatment, until she wasn’t. Then she went to the hospital, to the covid ward. She fought like hell. Her grandfather was a boxer, fighting is in our blood. For nearly a month she went toe to toe with this damn plague. October 13th, 2020 she coded and her heart stopped. Doc got her back.

They tested her made sure she was clear and my sister and I got to go see her. To be blunt the lights were on but she wasn’t home. I held her hand, told her I was proud of the fight she put up, and it was ok to go. I know how fucking lucky I am that I got to see her. So so many never got that luxury.

Docs asked what my sis and I wanted to do. Mom didn’t want to be a vegetable. The plan was to cut the machines, give her a last round in the ring to fight back, but if not she’d pass away.

October 18th, 2020. Mom loved Christmas and snow. It was cold that day, with a bit of snow coming down. At 10:00am my phone rang, she was gone.

The thing I fight all the time now, is anger. I can’t put it into words, anyone part of the “lost a parent” to covid club knows what I mean. You can’t fight the anger it just sits there. I meditate a lot, and try to do constructive things with it.

Anyways that’s my tale. I just wanted to get mom’s story out, I’m dealing with my loss as well as I can.