Some cunt rolls up in his Ferrari to panic in the Aldi purchasing department. "Our supplier has changed the look of the Basa fillet packaging". Having no idea what basa is the executive takes another snort of cocaine and totally off his tits, declares his great solution. The ubiquitous epithet.. Said cunt staggers off to the board room to find out what his annual bonus is..

That old dear across the road, the old giffer walking his dog, your local MP - how are you supposed to know if he's far-right wing or not?

Never fear, this guide will help you decide, and what action you should take.

The old giffer and the dog, is it a British Bulldog? Yes, then he's certainly right-wing, but maybe not far-right. He needs re-educating.

Your local MP. Does he wear a "Migrants Welcome" or "Free Palestine" badge? If he doesn't then he's certainly a racist and far-right wing. Time to organise a protest outside his home.

Ambulances - Red cross on a white background. St. Gearge's cross. That's no ambulance, it's probably a bus being used to ferry far-right wing thugs from riot to riot. Glue yourself to an ambulance station.

Overheard a pensioner muttering complaints about migrants? DANGER she's probably got an AK47 stashed in her handbag or a bomb or a tactical nuclear weapon - start running.

Remember Nazis are hiding everywhere. Disguised as nuns or priests, circus clowns and who knows what..

It's their mess, let them sort it out.

You know it. :)

That'll get the Tories out.

Settle it once and for all.

Clarkson, Farage, Piers Morgan, the Queen, whoever else they love...maybe they'll listen to them.

Piers Morgan vs Jeremy Clarkson, Gemma Collins vs Scarlet Moffat, Katie Hopkins vs Jenny Bond