(Tried posting to Canada and it was auto-blocked ^((probably because throwaway)), moderator blocked on /r/britishcolumbia because it's "not in the spirit of the sub")

TL;DR - Half of Canadians cannot afford to take the time off the try accessing (the inaccessible and inadequate) mental health services. If they manage to get time off, they have to deal with counsellor turn-over ^((counsellors quitting, being fired, moving, or just not being the right fit),) financially prohibitive specialized help, ^((ie; trauma therapy, oft confused with counselling, which cannot be legally provided by a gov. paid therapist)) and financially & physically prohibitive medications. Also crucial are: access to transportation, access to a phone, and access to internet. PLEASE NOTE, care is not culturally responsive across the board, and issues like racism, fatphobia, and sexism dramatically impact quality of care. The solution is to address these problems, discrimination included.

Hi, so, let me start off by establishing some background on how I'm qualified to talk on this. Also, before you get disheartened, I will be explaining what services are accessible but, in doing so I acknowledge that an informed doctor (general physician/family doctor) is CRUCIAL, rare, and remains the largest single obstacle besides money that I've encountered to date. If there are questions that I can answer, please ask and I'll do my best! Also, you might start reading and know immediately who I am. In which case, hieeee.

Okay, to work!

Herein I'll be outlining my experiences within BC's healthcare system, and more specifically my experiences as a young, low/no income girl/woman who has been ACTIVELY and CONSISTENTLY doing "everything right" to get help since I was 14 years old. This year, I turn 26. Throughout the journey I've received varying diagnosis' but presently I'm diagnosed with PTSD. When I started seeking help, I thought I "just" had really bad anxiety.

Diligently, I've followed up with every professional I've been able to access in order to relieve my symptoms. I checked my records and I've spoken to at least 8 counsellors, 3 GP's, and 2 psychiatrists. I've spent more than 200 hours in doctors appointments, and I've taken (starting at age 15) more than 23 medications. (I have a list! it's depressing.) I'm lucky that I've recently been able to get in touch with a psychologist, but they're only available through a region and age specific "test drive" type of service which is funded largely through donation and not the government. The same goes for the psychiatrist I see presently. They remain inaccessible to most low income individuals. They, along with my good doctor, have kept me alive. What I'm saying is, I'm lucky and most people don't have the time or ability to do all of the things I have. (I've just been too scared to do much else, so, I mean. not that lucky.)

So, lets start with meds. Having tried more than I hope you ever have to, I can pretty comfortably say it's not realistic to expect someone to be 'all better' when they start taking medication. First, medication is not free. If you thought "universal healthcare" meant universal, I'm here to break your heart a little. On Effexor alone, I spent more than $6k - considering the withdrawal is literally described online as being "worse than heroin" this means I was unemployed, unable to pay, and physically depending on a medication I couldn't afford and was not allowed to wean off of FOR YEARS, despite proof it didn't work. People who loved me and didn't want to see me withdraw paid for my medication for me. I couldn't apply for special coverage for the medication because it didn't work. Literally. What??? I was so physically dependent on it that if I missed a dose by 7 hours I would start to have heart palpitations, and if I fell asleep without taking it the whole next day would be a write off, and that's just ONE medication. OF MORE THAN 20. I can safely say at least 6 others made me very sick at least while adjusting to and weening off of them, even doing so exactly as instructed. About 16 of the medications were at least not notably disruptive (so still decent odds) but I've still had to pay well over 10k over the last 10 years combined, all with money I could have used to build my credit, buy food, buy clothes, pay bills, fix my teeth, and get specialized help which is also not covered. While most people my age are working on building their lives, I, like many other people struggling with their mental health, will be playing financial catch-up probably for the rest of my life. Despite the Human Rights Code of BC technically protecting my right to work, I've seen enough and worked enough to feel that finding an informed and compassionate employer in this climate (read: a boss who won't fire me for crying when a guy comes in who looks like my dad) is basically none. I'm in school because at least its therapeutic in a way I can get a loan for, and I can't be expelled for having flashbacks. I don't know what's next. I'm hoping I can fix this for other people and get paid for it, but I'm wingin it out here, maaan.

While I apparently trust the science enough to have tried more than 20 meds, the take-away here is that medications are often financially prohibitive. Beyond that, the physical toll from a medication, even if it works, can be significant enough to impact employment, relationships, and education. If you symptoms are not disabling, medication may take you out of the game for a bit. It's important to be ready for that. For a medication that works, it's worth it. For a medication where there are more cons than pros, it's not. Either way, nearly half the population can't afford to take the time away from work or they won't be able to pay rent and/or eat. Some people can't afford to see their doctor for a prescription, let alone take one.

"But, dude" - you're thinking - "that's like, still so many meds. Why?" Well, friend, that's a good question. I've taken so many medications because, despite often being disabling and financially prohibitive, it's a lot easier to get a prescription than it is to get affordable specialized help. This is true for people with physical disabilities, too, who would like to reduce their symptoms and cannot afford to. Essentially, in my case, the government has put no restrictions on the medications I can have (MAOI's are lethal when combined with many common foods and OTC meds, pain meds) but the government has used "safety" as an excuse to limit the services it needs to provide to me to reduce my symptoms. Literally, friend, all I need is trauma therapy. I can't have that, but Medically Assisted Death is no problemo. What does that say about my worth? I'd love to ask Zaddy T why the liberals voted against the program that currently covers my medication. Conseratives are a whole thing but they aren't helping either. I'll let that there, but it brings up the societal aspect of it all.

We know the government isn't doing enough to ensure access to basic healthcare and isn't planning to change that, at least meaningfully, any time soon. So, like, why can't people just call one of those hotlines or see a counsellor? Well, the hotlines you might see at your workplace or school, while a useful tool in a crisis, are a band-aid on an open wound. A counsellor is not a trauma therapist, and the distinction is an important legal one because not only is the term used interchangeably, no professional being paid in any part by the government is legally allowed to administer trauma therapy, and I'm hoping you remember what I said about the MAOI's because the reason is, as you might've guessed, an increased risk of death. (LIKE, I COULD'VE DIED ON THE MAOI'S BUT OKAY. NO REALLY. THAT'S FINE. DO I SOUND MAD BECAUSE I'M NOT NO REALLY NOT AT ALL.) So, therapy and trauma therapy are also financially prohibitive. Gaaaaah. Dead end after dead end.

Counselling and, if you manage to find it, general therapy ARE helpful, but finding the counsellor for you often takes time. You might find three that do nothing and three that make you feel worse before you find one who makes you feel better. That comes back to what I said, earlier, though, about what people have access to. Half of Canadians cannot take the time off to test run half a dozen counsellors - they cannot take the time off to help their children access counselling, either.

So, since you're probably tired and sad now, let me get to the point.

Because mental health support is limited and inadequate, cost prohibitive, and not distributed evenly across the country (towns with no psychiatrists, I see you) the best thing you can do to help the people around you is listen and be open to educating yourself. You don't need to get read every single wiki on every single disorder. You can start by reading about what interests you or applies to you or someone you love. I'm in school now studying how to address this problem, and what my research shows is that community support makes a significant and life altering difference. In statistics, it shows up as reduced criminality and suicidality. (I'm not linking my sources because idk if that's allowed but I can if requested.) If you want to help, talk about your feelings. Give people the benefit of the doubt that they're doing the best they can. When you see someone struggling, please understand that they are doing the best they can - and when hear someone say "oh, they could get help if they want it, they just don't want it bad enough" please tell them that wanting it is not the issue. Access is. The government just doesn't give a singular puck. ^((get it? like hockey.))

If you're struggling and discouraged, you can DM me - I have time for you.

Not sure if this is going to be enough about covid to justify this rant, but this seems to be the place to go in order to vent for a bit. The past couple years have seen me be extremely dissatisfied with life. I have moved out with my partner, gotten a puppy that ive always wanted, have a secure job and just went on a vacation that ive wanted for years, but I still feel "nothing". Its like these things dont fulfill me. I feel trapped living in BC and feel like ill never have the life I want to if I continue to live here. Ill never be able to afford a home that I want (even though I am good with my finances), the weather is depressing and dragging me down, the cost of living keeps rising, and the policies of the government just make life more and more challenging because they keep funding their vanity projects with our money and taxing us into oblivion. I would love to leave, but my job and family are reasons enough for me to stay. Everything else suffers though.

I have spoken to a counsellor for a few months and it had little to no effect and just resulted in hundreds of dollars of wasted money. I am more concerned with money than I am with my mental health at this point, due to inflation. I know its in the shitter, but I genuinely feel like my mind cant be helped unless there is some optimism to be had in Canada (for the entire population). I have a hard time living in the moment and just enjoying life, when there is so much crap going on out there. I feel like its more important to be informed and be angry, than to be oblivious and happy. I dont know if this makes sense, but its how I feel and im glad I shared it.

I’m currently undergoing chemo treatment for breast cancer and am due to have a mastectomy in early to mid April (have to schedule my surgery after my next chemo treatment). I’m worried that it might be delayed like it would be in other provinces. I’m basically wondering if the province has made cancer surgeries more of a priority than say back or hip surgeries. I’m just worried my surgery will be delayed.

Usually Christmas and New Year provide a break in the regular monday-friday routine.

Instead of being a fun holiday, I'm getting extra stressed out trying to do all my work and preparing Christmas "gifts" and desserts. Usually I love this stuff, but I think I'm too burnt out this year.

I’m not gunna lie I’m really bummed out. I know some lost much more (their jobs, income etc) just literal days before Christmas and with almost no notice. But the gym was the one thing I started this year that really kept my head above water mentally through all this Covid stuff.

Not to mention I just found out my sibling tested positive for Covid and I won’t see them now this Christmas. Then hearing my best friend won’t be able to see her family because it’s a big family so it won’t be within the 10 person limit.

I’m just exhausted, feeling like I’m doing my part and continually getting shit on.

Again I know there’s so much worse happening to others but damn this new news on restrictions really hit me harder than the other times. Anyways, how are you all coping?

It hasn't been easy - not by a long stretch. So many things have been thrown at you in the past couple of years - curveballs you could have never imagined. You have faced multiple major simultaneous events in your life and around the world that no other generation has dealt with in the history of humanity.

You take a few to the face and body and aren't sure that you can get up again sometimes. But you do. You get out of bed again and again, even when you don't feel like it. You power through the anxiety, fear, hopelessness, sadness, and anger. You fight through it all even when you're running on empty. Sometimes, it feels like the only light coming down the tunnel is a train. But you get up again and again and tell that train to pound sand.

For all that you are going through and have gone through, you need to know that you are a fucking boss. You are doing your absolute best in the face of a wild and unprecedented shit storm. Getting up each day is a win. Brushing your teeth or taking a shower or a nap or a walk is a win. Celebrate those small victories. Recognize that you are going through/have gone through a lot. Be kind to yourself. Be proud of yourself. I'm proud of you and I am so grateful that you're here with us.

If you need a friendly ear or someone to lean on, just say the word. Keep fighting the good fight.

Hello all!

I am working on a list for mental health service and I want to include a list of resources for those who prefer to read a book or web-articles to that speak to mental health.

Here are some of my recent reads that I found helpful:

Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse: https://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/0997829087/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Raising Human Beings: Creating a Collaborative Partnership with Your Child Creating a Collaborative Partnership with Your Child
https://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/1476723761/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

​

Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder
https://www.amazon.ca/Stop-Walking-Eggshells-Borderline-Personality/dp/1572246901/ref=sr_1_3?gclid=CjwKCAiA4veMBhAMEiwAU4XRr2SWQqp-2Ek7pyK9f6l5TTejlkOz0P-vxRStCNDtQUnaJbH-gjvH-BoC64UQAvD_BwE&hvadid=208428560321&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9001502&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=7874195732636854669&hvtargid=kwd-297786884316&hydadcr=23314_9622011&keywords=walking+on+eggshells&qid=1637787158&sr=8-3

I will start with these, but I would love it if we could share what worked well for us!

We're quite active on Discord these days, but there's a lot more people in this sub. Just wanted to check in with everyone and see how you were doing this week.

Girlfriend broke up with me, losing connection with friends, work contract expires in December, grocery prices increasing by the minute, holidays coming and nothing to show for it.

I have not achieved anything this year. Only thing keeping me afloat is playing Valorant and playing badminton once a week and I’m in my late 20s

I need a change but dont know where to start. I wanna start going to the gym but the prospect of doing that alone AND with no idea what I’m doing is daunting.

Sheesh.

Went down to Seattle yesterday and relief of just being able to leave the country after nearly two years...The feeling was indescribable.

Yesterday, I was emotional crossing Peace Arch and the border officer asked if I was ok and I just told him how much I missed just being able to do something as simple as crossing the border.

I didn't even have anything planned for the day other than to go to my usual stops - Trader Joe's, Target, etc...but I found such comfort in it. I used to cross the border on a semi-monthly basis, whether it was to go shopping, catch a Seahawks game or just because it something to do.

Returning to Canada, when they asked me why I went down for the day, I responded, "The last 20months have completely destroyed me and I needed this drive to help my mental state". She wasn't really prepared for that answer, but she responded with, "I'm happy you did what you needed to do".

I didn't realize how much I needed that drive down the I-5; it was beneficial to clear my head and to be able to finally leave the country. Mentally, I already feel like I'm in a much better place.

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend and great start to your week!

Name at least one thing you are grateful for today!

I’m grateful for my day off today so I get to pick up my son from school and spend some quality time with him ♥️

I am trying a new thing where I don't do anything in particular on the weekend and instead try to get all my stuff done during the week with a larger cleaning day in Friday night.

It didn't really work this weekend. So I don't really feel like I got a weekend at all.

As a person with some sort of mental health condition, (no idea what yet) I have taken up making chocolate. Its super fun. I just put my first batch in the fridge. Will take pictures when I am done.

It made me feel good! I might be able to clean the house or go to work with spouse later!

I'm a former recruiter and hiring manager. I also moderate the r/VancouverJobs subreddit. If you have any questions / need any advice related to your job search please let me know. Finally, I have a large LinkedIn network also and am happy to point you in the right direction (people-wise) if I can.

As an aside, I'm thinking about adding a tags requirement to posts like the one above so that they can be filtered easily (e.g. [Support Offer] and [Support Request]). Let me know your thoughts.

Business is hard enough without COVID. Not everyone starts off with a strong network and support. And it gets especially difficult when you drift away from friends, as a result of time and relatability.

I am a web & product designer/developer, with deep experiences in business development and marketing. If you are needing some help, connections, or just need someone to talk to, I'm happy to chit chat.

I've been known to be helpful ;)

---

A bit about me: Before I fell in love with design, I helped build 2 local, award-winning businesses, 1 award-winning international startup. However I got sick overseas, which was the worst thing one can do... Upon returning to Canada, broke, I almost died in surgery. It was a long road to recovery, which took me to a very dark place. By happenstance, I started a design agency and reinvented myself. Pretty good now.

I just thought I'd let you all know that CityNews reached out and wants to talk about the r/Vancouver thread that brought us together as well as this new community of support we're building.

I'm really excited to raise awareness about what we're trying to do together and the struggles many of us are facing.

Let me know if you have any suggestions for topics to touch on. This is definitely not about me. It's about all of us and I'd love to have your feedback. Interview is at noon today.

How do you unwind?

What activities do you do that are just for you?

What are your daily self-care rituals/routines?

How do you prioritize time for yourself with everything else going on?

Going to test this out as a daily thread and see how it goes. Please share your struggles and challenges.

As part of your post, please also include some self-care / self-love activities that you are going to do today. That way, we are all sharing our struggles, but also sharing some solutions / options that we can all benefit from. It is important to acknowledge the problems / struggles, but equally important, is that we are all taking positive steps each day.

Thank you for feeling vulnerable and comfortable in sharing.

I've never drank this much tea, coffee, and hot chocolate before moving to Vancouver. Loose leaf tea? That used to be weird to me. Now I'm researching brands and flavours and wishing I had a nice shop nearby to do taste tests.

I'm even putting together a tea corner near the window with plants and nice lighting. I can watch the rain, have hot tea, and cozy into blankets. Just 10 minutes in the morning is so uplifting.

I don't think I'm an expert in helping people, but I figure lots of people need someone to help figure something out, bounce some ideas off of, or just to exchange a few words.

If anyone wants to chat, feel free to send me a DM!

Some people are here to be supported.

Others are here to be supporters.

Some are here for both.

Some are here to brainstorm and problem solve and take action.

What brought you here? What do you hope to get from (or give to) this sub?