Is bleeding after fingering normal?

Hey everyone, so my girlfriend and I recently started being sexually active with each other. We've had sex a few times and it's always such a wonderful experience. We love each other so much, and want to make each other feel good. We're both also very open and comfortable with each other, and always communicate really well.

However, we're both inexperienced. Before each other, neither of us had any sexual experience, so we've been slowly learning each others bodies and also ourselves in this intimate way.

But recently she started bleeding after we have sex, after fingering (before this we had sex maybe 3 times and no bleeding). My nails are pretty short and blunt (as short as they can go), and we've discovered that it doesn't matter how many fingers we use (it's always either 1 or 2), she always bleeds afterwards. It's not just spotting either. I wouldn't say that it's extremely heavy but it's definitely a sizable amount. The bleeding never lasts very long and is usually over in a few hours after. It doesn't seem to be continuous bleeding but the most recent time I have fingered her, it was in the early hours of the morning (around 5am), she bled after and some more at around 2pm that same day. She doesn't experience any sort of pain or discomfort whatsoever at any stage.

We have no idea why this is happening, and while I want her to feel good and finger her the way she likes, I'm really concerned that I am doing something wrong. Or perhaps it's a bigger issue that we're not clued up about. I love her so deeply, I would never want to do anything that would cause her distress like this.

So any advice is greatly appreciated!

I feel so disconnected from my body during sex and it’s affecting me mentally. During sex, I aim to be a great lover and will do anything to make my partner feel good. Whenever it’s my turn to receive I feel so disconnected from my body. I can barely feel any touch (fingering or oral) on me. I have tried everything to fix like kegels, pompoir, etc but it’s always been hard for me to cum during sex. I wanna try blindfold to see if it helps me stay focused. I’m so frustrated with myself and I feel like a terrible lover because of it. I get a lot of satisfaction pleasing my partner. I’m sad that my partners may never experience the same satisfaction from me. I can cum using sex toys and have incorporated it during sex but I don’t feel anything. I’m so jealous of my lovers that can cum easily but unfortunately I am not like this. I know that a lot of women experience this but I can’t help but feel broken.

Does anyone have any tips that could help?

Gonna sound weird, maybe I’m the rude one here so correct me if I’m in the wrong. I’m in a friendgroup with 2 other people. One is a girl who’s OBSESSED with making lesbians jokes. The thing is, she’s not a lesbian. She’s bi with a preference for women, which is fine of course. If she made the jokes because she was questioning if she’s a lesbian that would be fine too. But she always been attracted to men, still is attracted to men, and is still willing/wanting to date men. But in every conversation she feels the need to call herself a lesbian and at this point she’s made it her whole aesthetic and personality. She saw pillows that vaguely looked like the lesbian flag “oh they’re selling me here”. She adds the lesbian flag colors to all her social medias, even conversations that aren’t about sexuality at some point she’ll say something like “I am so lesbian”. We’re talking about the gym, “I work out to pick up my future gf cause I’m so lesbian”, “I really like this game, but only the women in it cause I’m so lesbian”, “my knee hurts… I Hope my future girlfriend has strong knees cause I’m so lesbian” we get it!!! I’ve asked her if she’s still attracted to men, and she herself has said she is and that she knows she’s bisexual. She even DM’s me about cute guys she meets. I understand making lesbian jokes because she can be in a lesbian relationship but she actively makes jokes specifically about being a lesbian in EVERY. conversation. Which she’s not. How do I tell her that we get that she likes women but that’s she’s bi and that we don’t have to hear it every conversation

Hello my fellow lesbians. If you could be so kind, I could really use your advice.

Have you ever met a guy who seems like he could be the exception to the rule? Even if it were just a fleeting thought and you never took any steps to act on it?

I’m 34. I have been a lesbian my whole life. I’ve only dated women, and have only ever (seriously) considered dating women. I’ve always been at peace with this.

The reason I’m looking for insight here, is because there have been a small handful men in my life (like 3) who have caused me to rub my chin and say “…huh. That hits different.”

They’ve all been good friends, and I can see us being very compatible partners. They’ve always been into me in return, but were respectful enough to keep it at friendship because they knew I was as gay. They’ve all treated me like a queen, checked all of my boxes, and are truly beautiful humans inside. I knew that if I decided to try it, the only thing I would need to do is reach out and grab it (pun not intended)

What’s missing is the obvious romance and chemistry ….but sometimes I think there could maybe be a glimmer of it in there. Sometimes I wonder if I could be blocking it somewhere deep.

Whenever this has happened, I’ve been open to the experience, and took my time feeling and listening to myself, my body, my heart…but I’ve never felt sure enough to let them know that I was thinking along these lines because I didn’t want to hurt them or lead them on if I decided down the line that I’m just too gay. I didn’t want them to feel like they were some experiment. SA adds another layer. I knew that if I were ever to consensually and completely allow a man access and share that space with him, it would need to be a very tender and slow process.

Much too slow, it would seem. It wasn’t long before these exceptional men, beautiful as they are, found partners who showed no hesitation and curbed no enthusiasm.

Then there’s this guy. I love his family (I was friends with his parents first) and I love him. I can honestly say I will never meet a better person. So kind and caring and gentle. A farmer with the most beautiful mountain acreage I’ve ever seen. His values align with mine and there is a calm, safe energy. Aesthetically, he is a Greek god. I want to have children with him (something I never thought I would want). I want them to have him as a father, I want them to have his parents as grandparents, and our community as their community. I want them to experience growing up in the freedom of those mountains. I want that for myself too.

He hit different right away, and I admitted to myself that if there were ever a guy to explore this with, it would be him. But I was never going to initiate anything, because I still am not sure and I don’t want to break his heart.

With women, the feeling of attraction is SO in your face. There’s positively no denying it or confusing it with any other feeling. It’s pure sexual magnetism. I’m an animal for a woman I’m attracted to. With this guy, I don’t feel like an animal, just a person- but I feel like the best person I could be.

Last night, while he was helping me dig up a Christmas tree, he told be straight up that he has a huge crush on me, knowing full well that I’m gay. It took me by surprise, and shocked me out of my limbo stay that I’d been living in internally when it came to thinking about him. So later on, after we finished decorating the tree, I decided I should just kiss him. I thought maybe it might answer the question of if it were possible for my body to react to his.

But when I looked into his eyes, he said “are you gonna try and kiss me?” And I said “um…I was thinking about it?” He said “don’t you think it’s a little fast? Should we go on a proper date?”

I’m telling you, this guy hits different.

We talked about maybe this weekend…but then I texted him and told him I needed the weekend to ground…and I’ve kind of been avoiding him all day 😕

I really don’t want to hurt him.

Does anyone else have a story like this to share? My friends are all telling me to lock down that gorgeous beast asap and my mom told me that if I didn’t marry that man and have babies she would slap me sideways (my mom and friends have always been supportive of my sexuality by the way) but I’m having trouble getting them to relate to my feelings of wanting him in my mind and heart, but feeling like my body needs time to catch up …and the fear that perhaps it wont 😔.

Thank you for reading

Hi!! about 5 years ago I realized I was bi… I’ve been nervous to talk to girls because my mind jumps to being a literal wlw virgin (and I say jumps bc just bc you’re talking to someone doesn’t mean yall will sleep together)

But any tips for someone who gets nervous easily, for first time wlw sex? I’m lowkey embarrassed that i’m asking Reddit this… but I don’t have many female LGBT friends in my area ):

TIA💗

EDIT: Crossposted on another subreddit; I didn't think a post that was auto-removed would end up being posted

We usually have a great relationship outside of this. She is usually a responsible and considerate person, but there are certain instances where she is unreliable. For context, we are both 24 years old and we do not live together (I live 20-45 minutes from her depending on traffic).

My girlfriend really struggles to get up early and if she manages to do so, her mind may not be awake yet. Trying to talk to her while she's half-awake makes her upset, so I have to wait for her to wake up. I have to get up early for work once a week and I appreciate her for driving me there, but something always prevents us from leaving on time. For example, she loses her keys or her jacket, or she has to take out the trash right this instant, etc. She has made me late for work on multiple occasions, which really overwhelms me because I hate being late.

She also falls asleep at random times and misses plans/deadlines because of it, and it took her 7 months to try any of my suggestions. I have made similar mistakes (I relate due to inattentive ADHD) and I know that she's trying her best, so I try not to bring it up too much. However, sometimes she makes it really hard for me to avoid talking about it.

We are currently trying to make plans for tomorrow night, but I have to work early in the morning the next day. I know she struggles with getting up early, so I said we can see each other as long as she brings me back home the same night. She keeps asking me why I can't spend the night and I don't know what to say because it is her fault. I am already under a lot of stress (holidays, end of semester, etc) and I can't deal with the additional stress of wondering if she'll wake up on time, trying not to make her mad by talking to her too soon, constantly watching our ETA while she's using the bathroom, trying not to look or sound too stressed when I remind her that we have to leave soon, etc. What I need right now is a peaceful commute to work and she can't give me that.

(Also, she was supposed to give me an answer on a related time-sensitive matter by 7 am today and I still don't have that answer at 7 pm because "her phone was under her bed", I'm assuming she fell asleep again)

What should I do if she keeps asking me to spend the night? How do I tell her she's unreliable without telling her she's unreliable? How should I go about this without being too harsh?

I want to date a woman, but I’ve never been with one and have no experience with even myself because I’m not a fan of it. I’m scared I won’t be enough or good enough, especially when a lot of people who I know are bi/lesb have already been with multiple women and had relationships with them.

How do I tell when a woman is flirting with me or just being a girls girl? Or that she’s into women? And how do I find a woman that’s okay being with someone that’s UTTERLY inexperienced?

I came out back when I was 15, but at 16 got into a very intense, toxic lgtr with a man that found me being into women disgusting, so I convinced myself that I was straight, and told friends I just had that typical teenage phase, but the questioning is inescapable now.

Do other lesbians actually scissor/trib and how do you make it more enjoyable/comfortable? I recently tried again w my partner for the first time in a while and it felt amazing! So many people don’t think it’s a thing.

Both my gf and I are Child free .

I am curious to know if you feel more comfortable talking to gay women than when you talk to straight women.

Honest question!

I'm trying out dating apps for the first time and I have a general complaint about all the fem ladies with long-ass acrylic nails. Maybe there are some particularly talented women out there who can make it work, but to me it just screams "I have no idea what to do with a woman's body and just put 'bi' on my profile because I'm curious."

Am I unfair in my assessment?? What's your experience

EDIT: I feel like a lot of the responses focus on how having long nails works for them either in their current relationship or because they're happily single. And in each case, hey, more power to you. But I feel like those are both markedly different than the choices you make for your online dating profile.

Those of you who are saying I'm making an unfair judgement, your opinion is heard: I get where you're coming from. I can't honestly say it won't still be part of my vibe check on swipes though. It seems like considering small things like that are all fair game when you're trying to make judgements based on something as abbreviated as your hinge profile (or whatever.)

Hey everyone!

So, I’ve been using a strap on my current girlfriend and she really enjoys it, and I really enjoy pleasing her, but don’t really get much pleasure out of it since I’m not feeling anything. Are there any products or anything for the person wearing the strap- that may help them experience more pleasure?

Does she like me?

So im studying for nurse We had to learn bandages today And im having that practice with a teacher i see only on lectures She’s pretty We are like 15 ppl on that all girls and one boy The teacher (let’s name her Zoe) needed a model to show different bandages (today was on head )right She pointed at me and said ,,You.Come here ‘’ She started bandaging my head while explaining on the others how to do it She is a little taller than me At one point when she finished third type of bandage she casually said to me ‘’wow…you look beautiful though’’while looking in my eyes Maaamm slow down i just saw you that close Every time she finished bandaging me and removing it she fixed my hair cuz it was all messy 🫠🫠🫠 Also im 20 she’s well…old But she lives alone so no husband.Her son is older than me though

Hey I want to buy my first strap on and I'd love to get some recommendations. I want something good but not too expensive... I would be grateful for any tips / suggestions!!!

Hey everyone! I don't feel almost anything when I receive orals or scissoring because my legs are spread. I also don't have anorgasmia because I can achieve orgasm when I masterbate with my legs closed and my hand between them pulling my wrist up with my other hand which means lots of pressure on the area and stimulating a nerve called pudendal nerve (unfortunately it seems I can't post the picture of the nerves here so please search for yourself). It's very similar to what is explained in this video:

https://youtu.be/hO9VGu289AA?si=stf_PeFOonMMnxyM

Anyways, I think everyone knows about kegels but I want to know if there is an exercise similar to that or any treatment like electroshock therapy or cream that can enhance the nerves outside (vulva) especially when legs are spread because kegels is only good when you close your legs. I also saw a post online post recommeding an exercise for achieving orgasm with legs spread but it was for inside the vagina but I couldn't find anything for this. It strengthens the ubturator nerve and the muscle is called hip flexers for anyone interested. But please tell me something for outside to achieve the orgasm during oral with legs spread please. Reading reviews of the O Shot cream it doesn't seem to working that much so is there an exercise or electroshock therapy? Btw, I want to achieve orgasm with my partners body not plastic so please don't advise any sex toy.

throwaway acc bc omfg.

yesterday i (18f) got rlly high and broke down in tears when i realised: im a lesbian. however im in an impossible situation.

my boyfriend (20m) is really kind, charming, etc.

kindest man you ever met, any girl would feel safe in a room with him.

very shy, very classic golden retriever, subby, etc. hes very kind and patient with me despite me being his first girlfriend and me having bpd, which is notoriously known to make relationships harder. we are also long distance. hes very handsome and attractive and i can see myself with him sexually - in theory.

the only thing we have in common is our sexual tastes. we are in a bdsm relationship where i am the domme and he is the sub.

we met in a BDSM discord server (yeah ik cast ur judgements now) he says he likes that i was goth in the beginning, but he knows nothing about the goth subculture, which rlly threw me off bc i thought id be able to talk about my interests with someone finally.

we have 0 things in common. the meyers briggs personality test? we got complete opposite results. we grew up very differently, which makes him very out of touch with financial matters, i grew up constantly moving due to the foster system and hes done the same thing his whole life. he describes his childhood as pretty good and his teenage years as boring. thats not to say he isnt insecure or doesnt have anything bad going on, but his life compared to mine is very very different, and bc i grew up in such a traumatising setting, he doesnt understand a lot of what im going thru and i cant really talk to him about it.

we have different sense of humor, different morals, different styles, we dont have any interests in common, he likes video games like league of legends or dead by daylight, and i prefer the sims 4 and minecraft. we dont have similar music taste, or movie taste.

anyway, all this to say,

my boyfriends parents split before he was old enough to remember. he says the divorce didnt affect him that much because he was too young to remember nd it affected his siblings more.

they split because his mother was a lesbian. his mother is currently remarried to a woman and i think that maybe it affects him more than he tells me.

im his first gf and it took a long time for him to introduce me to his family.

i need people to understand that while i dont love him as a partner, i love him as a person. he has such a tender and open heart and i know this would crush him.

i cant find the guts to break up with him bc hes one of my only supports. i go to him when i need to talk and while hes not as helpful most times, he cares about me and just wants to ease my stress.

i know the more i put it off, the more itll hurt when i break it off.

im not asking "should i break up with him" bc i know the obvious answer is yes.

im asking how to live with myself afterwards.

Hello! I’m bi and have a crush on a girl in my program. Unfortunately I am super quiet and shy, and a complete awkward mess when it comes to socializing in general. My program is pretty small and we mostly have the same classes everyday, and there’s one girl that I’ve noticed since the start. I first met her at the beginning of the semester when I sat next to her in a class and she introduced herself. From then on whenever we’d see each other she would always say “hi my name”. There is also a class where we have designated tables, luckily we are in the same group and she ended up exchanging her number with me and the other person at our table, I assume for class/assignment purposes. That day after class was over she actually walked with me as well, which I thought was nice. I didn’t initially have a crush on her, but it’s grown over time. She is very sweet and friendly.

Unfortunately we don’t really see each other often anymore as she has a somewhat established friend group, but when we do come across each other we’ll say hi. There have been times where I’ve wanted to sit next to her in class but I get hesitant, plus her friends are usually sitting opposite her so there isn’t really space for me to sit directly next to her. I really, really wish I could talk to her and get to know her better since the semester is almost done, but honestly the thought of talking to her terrifies me even though she’s kind and not intimidating. I always worry how I’m perceived, even the last times I’ve spoken to her I worry that I come off as boring, uninterested, and I always run out of things to say.

Recently there have been opportunities where I could have gone up to her or sat beside her, and now I kick myself realizing I should have. Like today for the first class, I sat at the back and I seen her sitting near the front with her friends. Then in the next class, I planned on sitting in my usual spot at the back, and surprise, she was sitting at the back. Her friends didn’t end up coming to class. However, I went to sit somewhere else as I suddenly felt weird (which I’m now profusely kicking myself over.) I should have sat beside her, but the only thing is I feel like it would be awkward to just pull up next to her, especially because it’s a big classroom and there’s lots of other places to sit. She also set her belongings on the seat next to her and there was someone else opposite her, so if I had ended up choosing to sit there, I’d be awkwardly cramming my way in. Ugh idk I think I’m over analyzing it. I’m curious why she chose to sit at the back where I usually sit instead of sitting at her usual spot, although it was likely because it’s the closest seat available from the entrance, plus her friends didn’t go so it was probably just random seating choice.

I really would like to start speaking to her, but I don’t know where to start because my anxiety always gets in the way. Another thing is I don’t know her sexuality or if she has a bf, and I have a feeling she might just be straight. I tried using a dating app to see if she was on it, but no luck. I’m worried that I’ve come off as unapproachable, as the times that we have spoken I’m really quiet. I do look at her in class, but I don’t think she notices me. And as mentioned before, I do have her number but I feel like just texting out of nowhere would be weird :/

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for starters i just want to say that any help and response would be appreciated since i have no one to talk to about this and all of this is sort of new to me so thank you in advance! (and sorry if its long)

i am a freshman in college and i have a huge crush on a girl. i’ve been aware that i liked girls for a while but i never had a crush this big and its honestly making me question everything lol. she’s a junior and we have one class together. i am 99% sure she’s queer because i’ve seen that she follows lgbtq pages on instagram and she’s a masc i think.

anyway its gotten to the point where im so infatuated that i am considering approaching her and idk trying to start a conversation or something even tho i am very much intimidated by her as well lmfao (mind you i have never done this, i was just never a proactive type and i was never even attracted to someone this much) so how do i do it?? like i genuinely have no idea how to do it and i am generally a bit of a socially anxious person which makes this 10 times harder for me. also i look veeery straight and we live in a bit of a conservative place.

also how to deal with potential rejection, like i am aware that its seriously not a big deal and its normal but i am chronically embarrassed so pls help me!!

(btw i don’t think suggestions of asking her something class related would work bc she doesn’t pay attention in class at all so 😭)

I'm curious about going to a pride parade and or event but am scared, either of being called stupid from the way I identify or actually being validated which is something that barely happens within my own life. I just would like to know what it is like. Any input would be appreciated. Thank you

So my friend(37,bi,f) recently left her man(valid reasons) has recently shown interest in a woman(35,divorced,lesbian)but is too shy and is scared to make the step but wants to date but is also worried what that means to her and what others would think(shes been with women but never romantically). I(37,bi,m) see how how she brightens up with joy talking about it/her and i listen and try to be encouraging and supportive to the best of my ability and clearly she likes said woman a lot. i suspect comphet and want to help her out to the best of my abilities. So is there anyway discussion or way to help her feel more comfortable so she would feel more confident and comfortable?

I am sexually attracted to men but I have yet to have a relationship with a man that is “healthy”. I have realized that I am attracted to women emotionally. I have a “type” of woman that I am drawn to. I have never had a relationship with a woman- or anything sexual. I am so confused. What does this mean!?

I know that I taste different depending on where I am in my cycle. I’m not comfortable asking for this when I’m on my period, but I’m curious to know which week is preferable!

It just feels like the only place I can openly be a lesbian is online. I live in fear that my parents will want to send me to a re education program or just throw me out of the house. They openly discuss how being a lesbian was because Hollywood promoted it to keep the Catholic Church from getting bigger. At night I just cry sometimes at the stupid stuff and laugh how they think it's a choice who I'm attracted to. Just sometimes it just feels like I'm just shouting into my pillow just wishing some day I can just be myself.

I'm sorry I'm a little emotional if this isn't appropriate I'll delete it

I’m 🤏🏼 this close to coming out but I’m overthinking things again. I’ve always identified as demi because I was like I like men but only if they’re decent and I can have an emotional connection with them. But I don’t know.

My girlfriend is still friends with her ex, and I’m not sure how to work through my feelings about this.

For context, we are in a happy long term monogamous relationship and we love each other very much. This has been the most special relationship either of us have been in and I trust her completely.

However, she is still friends with her ex, who is someone she went through some significant life events with. Her ex is in a new relationship now, and my girlfriend and her ex had broken up a year before we even met. They share mutual friends and still talk about deep personal things and I know that they both see each other as special people in their lives.

I’d say I’m usually secure but this whole thing makes me feel really wobbly. I know it’s quite normal for lesbians to still be friends with their exes, but the whole thing makes me feel jealous, insecure and sad. I’ve spoken to my girlfriend about this a few times before, especially when certain things have upset me (they have exchanged gifts, or my girlfriend has attended a significant event of her ex’s) but my girlfriend reassures me that they are just friends now after their past. I have met her ex a few times briefly at parties but I don’t know how to act around her because I feel so uncomfortable and I feel weird seeing her around my girlfriend, and seeing them and knowing their history (and all the inside jokes and history that comes with that).

I can’t get over that they were in a relationship once upon a time and have been intimate with each other etc. I know my girlfriend used to love her. I don’t want to tell my girlfriend to stop being friends with her ex as I’m not a controlling person, but I’m not sure how to navigate this feeling as I know it’s a situation that is not going to go away.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can manage this? Thank you 🙏

The amount of times I've seen this in TV shows is insane.

Cute girl chats up cute bartender, turns out both are lesbians and immediately hit it off.

Is this a common fantasy or do tv show writers just think all girl bartenders are lesbian?

I was really drunk if that helps. Has anyone else experienced this?